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Possible monkeywrench in the mix.

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    30+ Possible monkeywrench in the mix.

    ...Because I know you're all just dying to know what new perceived drama has come about now ...

    In the midst of all of my stress over my relationship, I have been presented with a career-growth opportunity that could affect things with my SO. I have been asked to step into a new role at my organization that has a different and broader (and thus more versatile) classification than my current job title and classification. It is an exciting chance to grow and my supervisor told me that the broader category should mean more options later on and thus increased opportunities back where my SO lives. The catch is that I would have to commit a minimum of another year to this office, meaning another year apart from my SO. On the other hand, for all we know, it could take that long to find a job near him in our field anyway. If I accept the new responsibility, I might as well start looking for a new job right off the bat because the process takes so long.

    It may sound like an obvious decision but I am not going to officially decide until talking with my SO. He is off-grid right now for a few days while on a hunting trip and we are supposed to meet up this coming weekend--I don't want to over-extend him when he's just getting back from his trip, but he felt confident that this weekend should be fine. Thus, that's the soonest I can tell him the news.

    So external forces are going to prompt some kind of a relationship-future discussion that will override all of the worries that have been dogging me for the last couple of weeks. I almost want to ask the masses if ten months in is too soon to talk about making this work across the miles for another year, but I know that every relationship is unique and I have to use the next few days to figure out on my own how to bring up the topic and choose my words. In the meantime, I hope he's still up for meeting up for Halloween--we'll see how his hunt goes.

    #2
    You need to think about YOU first. What if things don't work out? What will you have left? Regrets?
    If it gives you opportunities to find a job closer to him as well, its almost a no brainer... plus I see you are less them 500 miles apart. That is an 8 hour drive ish for 1 person, or 4 hours to meet in the middle, so that really isn't hateful. You can do long weekends

    I would go for the career move for myself first. I know I need to stay in my job 1 more year to be 100% vested in my retirement. I am staying. Its the logical choice.

    I think you already made up your mind, and I cant see why your SO would not be in full agreement

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      #3
      Originally posted by sasad View Post
      You need to think about YOU first. What if things don't work out? What will you have left? Regrets?
      If it gives you opportunities to find a job closer to him as well, its almost a no brainer... plus I see you are less them 500 miles apart. That is an 8 hour drive ish for 1 person, or 4 hours to meet in the middle, so that really isn't hateful. You can do long weekends

      I would go for the career move for myself first. I know I need to stay in my job 1 more year to be 100% vested in my retirement. I am staying. Its the logical choice.

      I think you already made up your mind, and I cant see why your SO would not be in full agreement
      As it turns out, I was informed today that I should not owe any minimum time commitment. With the amount of time it would probably take to find a job where I want to be, I could be here a while anyway. Looks like it's a moot point unless I'm offered some kind of incentive in exchange for a minimum commitment. Too bad I can't delete this thread. LDRs are good test of sanity and now I can go back to worrying about everything else!

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