30+ I love my LDR

[JeanJean]

My wonderful BF and I have been together over a year now. and I have learned so much in that time. I just wanted to share what I think makes a LDR special.

1. You know it's not just about sex
2. You have to talk more and express what you really think
3. You know that every time they choose to call, text or email you it takes effort. It's easy to spend time with someone who is close by, giving time to someone who is far from you is a choice not out of convenience.
4. You don't lose yourself in their life. In the past I would re-invent myself to fit what I thought the other person wanted. This time I am 100% myself and 100% loved for it.
5. Taking it slow- I have been pressured to move to fast into commitment before, this time I am taking things one step at a time. At first I hated it, but now I appreciate every moment and every milestone.


These are just a few of the things that I have learned to appreciate about being in an LDR.
Don't misunderstand, missing him all the time is hard, but knowing that this is for now and one day, when its right, we will be together makes it worthwhile.

[R&R]

Very well put!!

[JeanJean]

Thank you.
Congratulations on your engagement.

[staruletto]

This x1000! My bf and I have also been together almost a year too. I think it's just the kind of relationship I needed.

[Moon]

I'm very happy in my LDR also. Sometimes I think that's age related; being secure in yourself and your relationship, not being worried about marriage and children, and each of you having responsibilities in your own areas that you can't just up and leave. Having had been previously married, I very much appreciate my independence.

[thelittlepanda]

I completely agree on all counts. My boyfriend and I haven't been together that long but I do know that we will have a more emotionally strong and stable relationship because we had to go through this long distance...and will probably have to go through it for a while. I am happier in this relationship than i have been with people that i spent day in and day out with. For some reason it feels like you grow closer even though physically you are far apart. <3

[JeanJean]

Littlepanda
I agree with you also. I have been in relationships where I was always on edge, thinking that the other person was cheating, or just not that into me.
When I first started talking to BF I was convinced that I would be even more on edge because of the distance. He has never given me any reason to doubt him. If I do start to get a little nagging feeling, we talk about it. I realize that at those times it's not about him, but about my past.
I don't think we could have grown this close if we saw each other every day.

[thelittlepanda]

Exactly, we have talked about trust and what not. And we both trust each other completely. We have both been cheated on, so that's something neither of us want. Nowadays with most relationships being just about sex or people just wanting to be friends with benefits and never defining anything it's hard to figure out whats real or not. Also, it makes the times that you are together that much more spectacular.

[80anthea]

I have been in relationships where I was always on edge, thinking that the other person was cheating, or just not that into me.
When I first started talking to BF I was convinced that I would be even more on edge because of the distance. He has never given me any reason to doubt him. If I do start to get a little nagging feeling, we talk about it. I realize that at those times it's not about him, but about my past.
I don't think we could have grown this close if we saw each other every day.

Yes, I completely agree with this.