Friend in CDR can be very frustrating!!!

[Talent_2]

First annoying thing i suppose is when im with her and her boyfriend they are constantly all over each other, and me and my friend spoke and she said if it ever gets too much especially if im missing my SO just to say and she would cool it (aw what a great friend i thought) well one day i was having a really bad day and mentioned to her she was making me uncomfortable and she went mental!!! telling her boyfriend he couldnt touch her in front of me(total over exaggeration)!!!!

Ok and secondly well i went to hand out round my friends today and we were talking about her boyfriends working long hours and she turned round and said to me that she feels she is in a LDR because she lives 20 minute walk away from him but only sees him like 3 times a WEEK!!

I had to laugh at her, i mean i would love to see my SO 3 times a month let alone 3 times a week!!! I just kept quiet as she told me how hard she is finding it and how much she is missing him!! I almost felt insulted lol!!

Sorry a bit of a random rant there lol!

Anyone else have friends that infuriate them sometimes????

[MoonWatcher]

Yes, yes, yes. I am RIGHT with you. Especially right now. My very best friend, whom I love dearly, was dumped by her fiance about 2 and a half months ago. She recently has been going through a "I don't care about anything/anyone, so I'm just going to make out with any hot guy I can find". Not only is it bad for her... it's bad for ME because I have to hear it!! And she's the type of person who goes into MAJOR detail (almost uncomfortably so :P) about what they do when they fool around and stuff. I think the worst time was when she described how he did something romantic and then they shared this perfect slow kiss, and I ALMOST lost it. I wanted to cover my ears and go "Shut up, shut up!!!". It's even worse seeing it. It's really tough having to be surrounded by that, and it puts thoughts into your head... and you can't do a damn thing about it.

But, on the upside, my relationship is actually going to last and we'll have super-hot welcome-home make out sessions all the time once he comes home ^_^ Then SHE'LL have to deal with it! (She's my SO's cousin, so she'll probably get it from both sides :P)

[LadyMarchHare]

That's really inconsiderate (not to mention gross) of her to be pawing all over her guy when they're around others. When you're with friends, you cut that out, no one needs to watch you swap spit and try getting your hands in clothed areas. Her reaction when she promised she'd be alright with it was worse, she needs to get over it. It is not the end of the world if you can't shove your tongue up his nose for five dadgum minutes.

Her comment about being in an LDR was also rude, especially since she knows you're in a true one. 20 minutes is not long distance, it's a hike or, for me, a walk around my mall's perimeter. My guess is she wants the attention she thinks you're getting by being a relationship "martyr".

I had a friend that was like that about my relationship. It caused her to go after guys like she was in the Sahara and they were bottles of Dasani brand water, and she'd BRAG about getting offered random sex at work as though I was in this to get laid, and would actually turn around and call me the whore when I'd share a dirty joke he told me with her or talk about him in any way, even in passing. "Oh you just want to lose your virginity." Because, you know, long distance is totally the way to go for innocence-losing.

[hissouthernbelle]

It is my experience unfortunately that people in CDRs can be really inconsiderate sometimes. My best friend is newly married and I understand that but when i am over at their house they often sneak off to their room WHILE I AM THERE. It really hurts me, esp when they complain that they havent had sex in OMG TWO DAYS and i havent seen my SO in months...

[elina]

My best friend is newly married and I understand that but when i am over at their house they often sneak off to their room WHILE I AM THERE. It really hurts me, esp when they complain that they havent had sex in OMG TWO DAYS and i havent seen my SO in months...

O_____o while you're there?! Oh god, I'd be sooooo pissed off. Should at least ask you to leave or something before doing anything.. that's unbelievable.

I haven't really experienced anything like this, thankfully. My friends have been pretty cool when it comes to this One of my friends has said how much she misses her SO when she hasn't seen him in a week or two but that's kinda understandable, if you're used to seeing your SO every day or really often, of course you miss them when you have to be apart for a longer period. Didn't think like this before, but I've realised that and changed my attitude

But yeah.. that 20-minute walking distance is pretty.. absurd And I don't really understand your friends behaviour either. First she tells you that you can ask her to tone it down and then when you do, she flips out? Make up your mind, woman -.- I wouldn't appreciate a friend like that

[LadyMarchHare]

They go do the horizontal tango while you're there? Geeze, who slipped hormones in THEIR Cheerios that morning? If they ever did that to me I'd be bringing a loud alarm or a fog horn and giving them 15 minutes before letting it go off and screaming, "time's up! Pants on and back to the guest who hasn't had any in longer than you!" Then again I'm a little mean.

[nicole]

They go do the horizontal tango while you're there? Geeze, who slipped hormones in THEIR Cheerios that morning? If they ever did that to me I'd be bringing a loud alarm or a fog horn and giving them 15 minutes before letting it go off and screaming, "time's up! Pants on and back to the guest who hasn't had any in longer than you!" Then again I'm a little mean.

ROFL that made me laugh!

Yeah I get frustrated when one of my friends is like "He's at football practice so I won't see him all weekend" I bite my tongue though, I know I was like that when I was CD, it's what you're used to in the end. But what REALLY annoys me when someone is like "I wish he would get home earlier, I haven't seen him all day!" He's at work love, he always go to work for that amount of time on that particular day, what's the problem????

It is inconsiderate when they are all other each other infront of you, they shouldn't do that in any company in my opinion. I think the most I did with my SO when we were CD was hold hands under the table when we had company, then maybe a kiss on the cheek if one of us was going to go get a drink or go to the bathroom.

It's not fair to push your relationship on other people, and besides, things like kissing and such are "Intimate acts" in my opinion. It really ceases to be intimate if you're doing it in public. Don't worry about it hun, they may be CD, but I bet you two have a better, stronger relationship anyway, it's a lot more than a physical relationship for one

[Veronica]

I get really frustrated every time one of my friends starts talking about my LDR..he is a good friend of mine and we study together for a couple classes, but he just doesnt understand why me or anyone would do 'something like that'.. He keeps on telling me how im wasting the best years of my life..and how it is so unfair for my boyfriend to ask that from me and make me wait and all..and how i might regret all this waiting when im older...jesus, some times it is a bit too much! But again you cant expect everyone to understand what we feel..and sometimes its not even worth explaining

[folclor]

I totally agree ^^; I've had to deal with friends in CDRs since high school. sometimes they're really accommodating and...sometimes not. When Alex and I were together the most intimate thing we did in public consisted of me sitting close to him in a booth and whispering to him every once in a while. his friends were there but they were trying to make us uncomfortable. at one point when they were distracted we kissed.

but I totally understand =/ it sounds ridiculous

[LadyMarchHare]

ROFL that made me laugh!

Yeah I get frustrated when one of my friends is like "He's at football practice so I won't see him all weekend" I bite my tongue though, I know I was like that when I was CD, it's what you're used to in the end. But what REALLY annoys me when someone is like "I wish he would get home earlier, I haven't seen him all day!" He's at work love, he always go to work for that amount of time on that particular day, what's the problem????

It is inconsiderate when they are all other each other infront of you, they shouldn't do that in any company in my opinion. I think the most I did with my SO when we were CD was hold hands under the table when we had company, then maybe a kiss on the cheek if one of us was going to go get a drink or go to the bathroom.

It's not fair to push your relationship on other people, and besides, things like kissing and such are "Intimate acts" in my opinion. It really ceases to be intimate if you're doing it in public. Don't worry about it hun, they may be CD, but I bet you two have a better, stronger relationship anyway, it's a lot more than a physical relationship for one

Oh I agree, it's what they're used to, but see the problem is they know someone has it worse and consciously refuses to take that into consideration. You can whine, but you have to choose the company you whine to because you may not get any sympathy. That's like losing a finger and crying to someone who lost both legs, you're going to either get a very stern "you're stupid" look or it's gonna be a peeing contest to see whose problems are bigger.

Me the most I'd do in public as far as affection is a hug and hand-holding. I'd be eerily aware of an audience if we kissed, I'm very conscious about what I do in public sometimes. To go "oh excuse us we're gonna go play 'hide the salami' for a sec" and run off is pretty much inviting some sour feelings. And God help you if the person you leave unattended has a camera.

[Silviar]

Man, all I gotta say after reading this thread is we should call it the inconsiderate friends thread.

Sometimes I wonder why we keep dummies like this in our lives, and I figure - they've always got something to keep you coming back, otherwise, why bother being friends with that?

[Talent_2]

Thank you for all your kind words and sharing your stories!

I have known my friend 20 years and i really do love her dearly but she can be pretty hot headed! For the majority of the time she is pretty cool, but your all right i really dont need to hear slurping every time im around them it kinda makes me distance myself from her when shes with him, which is annoying.

I totally believe me and my SO will last forever because its alot more than physical attraction i fell for him long before i fell for his looks lol!

Ive basically decided to throw myself into my job and getting my debts down and although ill still see her ill try to limit it when it comes to them being together its hard enough being in an LDR without being reminded every two seconds that i can have a hug when i want one

Gotta say i love this website its full of great amazing helpful people!!!

[LadyMarchHare]

Man, all I gotta say after reading this thread is we should call it the inconsiderate friends thread.

Sometimes I wonder why we keep dummies like this in our lives, and I figure - they've always got something to keep you coming back, otherwise, why bother being friends with that?

Agreed. It's why I hung on to the one that called me a whore for 9 years. There's always something keeping them at your hip, but there is a point where you have to distance yourself to save your own sanity if not outright drop them like a hot potato.

[Puramu]

I have two friends that are literally attached to each other, I swear. It's actually SCARY seeing only one of them and not the other. But yeah, first of all, they live right next to each other in the dorm rooms. Hmm, weird. Then they have classes together (they used to have like 3, but they guy dropped 2 of them). Even if they don't have classes together, they walk each other to and from class. They have lunch and dinner together, study together, go to the organic garden together, UGH!! It's too much, I would be going INSANE if I spend that much time with my SO, lol no offense. But I would need space. But they don't seem to mind at all, I wonder what's going thru their heads. Oh, and for breaks? They go to each other's houses. *facepalm* I don't understand it, I find it so weird. -_-

[Pixie]

I actually kind of have the opposite problem. My friends here are all single or they like someone who doesn't reciprocate so I feel guilty mentioning my relationship because they aren't in one/are having trouble. I always feel like me talking about my SO is rubbing it in their face that I have someone and they don't. Which is kind of silly because they're my friends and they say it doesn't bother them. It does make me a little wistful when I see random couples in public holding hands and stuff though.