Conflict of heart

[Kimme]

I just got offered an amazing internship position in Florida for second semester of school. I really want to take it and my SO who is studying in Germany for the year is telling me to take it there is just three problems:
1 I am the maid of honor in a wedding and others schedules seem to be more important than mine so I have to plan the wedding shower and bacholotte party around their schedules
2 I have a planned trip for Germany in march I'd have to cancel
3 I have problems with anxiety and don't want them to control my life anymore.
I'd make about seven grand and I'm wondering what you all think

[true_survivor_586]

3 I have problems with anxiety and don't want them to control my life anymore.

im not sure what this means, but over all i would take it if i were you, if you are serious about your career everyone should understand, not everyone is as lucky as you to get this chance, yeah whoevers wedding is important, maybe you can ask to just be a brides maid, that you cant put your all into being her maid of honor and you think someone else could do a better job? that way she doesnt feel like you are choosing this over her, donno if im helping,
why dont you give us some pros to taking this internship?

[LadyMarchHare]

Sounds like you're a bit of a people pleaser bordering on a doormat. The only issue I see is canceling the trip to Germany, but that can be rescheduled once you get settled and so forth. I think this job opportunity is just what you need, especially if your SO is supportive of it. The wedding can get planned by someone else, you're not getting paid (at least I don't think you are) to do it therefore it's not an obligation no matter whose wedding it is.

[mllebamako]

amazing internship position

I really want to take it

I'd make about seven grand

Those three quotes say it all. In this economy it is rare enough to be offered a job or internship let alone one that PAYS! If it is an amazing opportunity, you shouldn't let these things hold you back.

As for the wedding...as long as it's not in the next month or two, I would say, talk to the bride and ask her to choose another MOH. You could either ask that she replaces you and puts you in as a bridesmaid or that she takes you out of the wedding party completely. There is nothing wrong with that. Explain that this internship opportunity came up and you hope she understands. Tell her that you were honored that she asked you but that you would rather she finds someone who can really commit herself to it.
I've turned down bridesmaid offers before the same way. Just because she asked, doesn't mean you are obligated to do it.

[Andy]

I'd be taking that if I was you

Simple as that for me. And I'm awful at making decisions

[DarkSolitary]

I would take it if I were you. If your SO is supportive of the internship, a trip being postponed is understandable and as for being maid of honor you can turn her down, just because she asked doesnt mean your obligated. She will be bummed for sure but your future is more important than her wedding and she will understand Plus your getting paid! Paid internships are rare :P

[Caitlin2009]

go take the job!!! especially if he's very supportive of it go for it!!! hell i would love 7 grand in my pocket and in my paycheck!

[AshleyH]

If you go, you'll make money to fly out to see your SO more!

[DarkSolitary]

If you go, you'll make money to fly out to see your SO more!

Yes ^ Very good point =3

[sabby64]

I'd say take it. It's an amazing, probably once in a lifetime opportunity!! You can always plan another trip to Germany later, and I'm sure that your friends would understand about not being able to plan the wedding if you told them early enough. Like you said, you really want to take it, so don't let anything or anyone hold you back from that!

[squiddie]

I just got offered an amazing internship position in Florida for second semester of school. I really want to take it and my SO who is studying in Germany for the year is telling me to take it there is just three problems:
1 I am the maid of honor in a wedding and others schedules seem to be more important than mine so I have to plan the wedding shower and bacholotte party around their schedules
2 I have a planned trip for Germany in march I'd have to cancel
3 I have problems with anxiety and don't want them to control my life anymore.
I'd make about seven grand and I'm wondering what you all think

1) You are not obligated to throw wedding parties. The bride is not entitled to them, and your personal schedule is just as important as everyone else's. A maid of honor is just that, an honorary position. It is not code for "party coordinator". If she decides to demote you or remove you entirely, that's her deal.
2) Talk to the internship coordinators. You may be able to work that out. Otherwise, will pushing it back 2 or 3 months really kill you? This is something you clearly want, I'm sure your SO will support your decision to take it and understand a delay in visit.
3) Most university student health centers offer counseling to students. Try and get an appointment. Talk to a therapist about your plans, and your concerns about your anxiety, and develop a plan for you to address these issues.

You clearly want this, and your SO seems to be okay with it, so I think those should be the only two factors in play. Take the internship! This may be a once in a lifetime opportunity, and if you want it, then you need to go for it.

[paulawriteslove]

It sounds like your SO wants you to take it, so why not take it? Plus it has some great benefits!