I need help with my LDR

[ErikaCrane]

My name is Erika and in August my boyfriend of 3 years moved to Texas, over 2000 miles away. I live in Washington. Its been really hard to trust him lately, and I don't know why. Also we fight so much since he moved. He calls me such horrible names and screams at me and says he wants to hit me every so often. He never would have acted like this if he was here, I just don't know what to do anymore. Any help?

[mllebamako]

Well, there must be SOME reason that you are having a hard time trusting him...

And that is normal for people to fight more once they go long distance, it's how a lot of people deal with it. But what ISN'T normal is him calling you names/screaming at you/threatening to hit you. You need to tell him that is NEVER okay.
I understand that he didn't act like this before. But having a hard time with the distance isn't an excuse to treat you like this.

[Caity]

I agree with mllebamako. It is never ok for him to threaten to hurt you or scream at you. I can understand that he may be frustrated because of the distance, but that is no way to deal with it and he needs to learn other ways to cope. I think you need to send him an email explaining how you are feeling and try and talk this out with him without fighting or arguing. You need to make him understand that you are losing your trust in him, and you need to try and figure out why this is. Once you know the cause you can try and repair it and fix your relationship. Also try suggesting to your guy to take up a hobby or something that he can use to vent his anger or frustration. Something like a sport or anything that'll distract him from missing you. I hope this helps a little. =)

[Fadzi]

I don't know guys, I agree with you that fighting is normal and that him calling you names isn't...however, it is not just abnormal, IT'S UNACCEPTABLE!!!! Is that what he does when he throws his toys out the cot? Threaten to HIT YOU???? CALL YOU NAMES???? NO WAY! This, to me, sounds like a much much bigger problem that you might be aware of...or maybe you are. You should really have a talk and find out if either of you want an LDR.

[ErikaCrane]

In June I went to D.C. and when I came back I found out he got 4 topless pictures from some girl because I had refused to give them to me, I gave him a second chance and he started changing and treating me better, then we found out he had to move. We want to be together, we have been through everything, I mean everything. He proposed in July but now it's been harder and harder. I don't want him to be happy down there when I'm not happy up here, and His new friends are players and I believe he will turn out like them.

[Butterfly]

I don't know guys, I agree with you that fighting is normal and that him calling you names isn't...however, it is not just abnormal, IT'S UNACCEPTABLE!!!! Is that what he does when he throws his toys out the cot? Threaten to HIT YOU???? CALL YOU NAMES???? NO WAY! This, to me, sounds like a much much bigger problem that you might be aware of...or maybe you are. You should really have a talk and find out if either of you want an LDR.

^^^I completely agree. Fighting is usually inevitable in a LDR, but violence of any kind, is NOT. Nobody should ever call you names and they certainely should NEVER threaten to hit you.