Goodbye, I guess

[Rusty]

So, as I mentioned, the reason I flew over to my SO last weekend was that we've been having problems. Well, since I got back, I've been hearing from her less and less, and just got this dread feeling of inevitability in the pit of my stomach...

She ended it yesterday. So that's that. Tried and failed. Bugger.

I just wanted to say thanks for the support that you guys gave us - it really was appreciated. I don't regret having tried this for a second. I don't regret having flown out there. I don't regret the time, the effort, none of it. It was worth trying.

For anyone else who is new to this (like me), and reads this: please don't be put off. The potential is worth struggling for. I had a wonderful time with Jess, and I was proud to be in an LDR with her. I love her, and that was worth fighting for. It's a shame it didn't work, but sometimes these things don't. Do keep trying yourselves - you'll find plenty of great examples here of people who do make it work. Look to them, not me.

Gah, that was a bit pretentious, wasn't it?

I had a dream last night. I normally have very odd, almost kafkaesque, dreams. But this was straightforward. I was looking for someone in an American shopping mall. I found them. It was her. She hugged me. At least I could draw on real life for that dream.

Thanks again guys. It's been great. Crazy, but great.

Russ

[paulawriteslove]

I am so sorry to hear this. But it seems like you're taking this rather well. I'm going to miss you around here! *hugs*

[MissShortie]

You don't have to leave this site just because it's over if you don't want to leave...
I'm sorry things didn't work out for you both, I don't know how I would be right now in your shoes, more than likely a huge mess. I'm sorry

[Silviar]

I'm sorry to hear this. I enjoyed having you around, Rusty. If you ever have another LDR, we're here for ya mate.

[noodle]

Im sorry to hear that :/
It kinda sucks that it didnt work out, especially since you made such an effort to see her
But hey you at least got to see the states right (I know this might not be appropriate but hey lol life goes on eh)
You dont regret it so it's good Regrettin makes you fall into a big black whole and thats nooot good >_> lol
And just as Jess said you can stay on here if you want to! *hugs*

[Rusty]

Thanks guys. I imagine I probably will keep dropping in - I've become quite attached to this board - although I'm not sure how much I can legitimately contribute now...

But it seems like you're taking this rather well.

I don't know how I would be right now in your shoes, more than likely a huge mess.

Yeah, well... I've been preparing myself for this over the last couple of days (as I say, I just had this growing expectation that this was coming), so at least it didn't come completely out of the blue. I did deal with it last night in the sensible and mature way of going to the pub, and then getting a bottle of wine on the way home...

I just feel rather lost. I don't really know what to do with myself today, and I'm so used to constantly messaging throughout the day that now I'm not, the day seems strangely empty. Incidentally, I don't work on Fridays, and as a result I haven't actually gotten out of bed yet (got to love laptops). I just don't really want to do anything. Shall I get up? Nah. Shower? Nah. Find a bonfire/fireworks display tonight (remember, remember, the 5th of November and all that)? Nah. I'm sure I probably should get up and do something, but I just don't have the drive in me to bother today.

And, yeah, I've had myself a couple of cries over it. I'm sure more will come.

It kinda sucks that it didnt work out, especially since you made such an effort to see her
But hey you at least got to see the states right (I know this might not be appropriate but hey lol life goes on eh)

Well here's the thing - there's a side of me that is rather dispassionately analysing it all, and I'll be honest... I know I've got one hell of a romantic story out of it ("You mean you flew around the world to meet her for only one day to try to save the relationship?") That's got to earn some brownie points, right? Plus, you know... it's something I can look back on and say "yeah, I actually did that!"

[mllebamako]

Yes, you get brownie points! haha

But seriously, I'm sorry to hear this. At least you can say that you really gave it your all and put your whole heart into it. I think that's amazing. I know you feel lost right now, but with time you will fall into a new routine, a new reality.
I hope you'll stick around here. Just because you're no longer in a relationship doesn't mean you can't contribute/give advice/etc.

[noodle]

It was just one day? O_o Or was that a joke? lol
and yes you can have bunch of brownie points xD
but yea I get your point lol But oh well as I said life goes on I mean I know it might sound cruel or mean but what else can you do? Drown yourself in depression? >_>

[Rusty]

It was just one day? O_o Or was that a joke? lol
and yes you can have bunch of brownie points xD
but yea I get your point lol But oh well as I said life goes on I mean I know it might sound cruel or mean but what else can you do? Drown yourself in depression? >_>

Well, it was supposed to be both Saturday and Sunday, but as she was ill it wound up just being the one day...

But yeah, you're entirely right - life does continue. All I can realistically do is take what I've learned from this (and I've learned a lot) and take it with me into the world. To do any less is not only a shame, but a waste. I told her once that she's helped make me a better man, and I truly believe that. Do I let it slide now? Of course not. I carry it with me.

[mattheww65]

Well, it was supposed to be both Saturday and Sunday, but as she was ill it wound up just being the one day...

But yeah, you're entirely right - life does continue. All I can realistically do is take what I've learned from this (and I've learned a lot) and take it with me into the world. To do any less is not only a shame, but a waste. I told her once that she's helped make me a better man, and I truly believe that. Do I let it slide now? Of course not. I carry it with me.

That one gives you at least +50 man points! Sorry to hear about that mate, but like you said some things just aren't mean't to be. Thats a great way to look at it. I wish that after any breakup I could handle it like you are.
Good luck mate

[Rugger]

I wanna hug you so much right now! I'm sorry it didn't work out least you can say you gave it your best shot ( you flew around the world for ONE day, if that isn't your best idk what is).

*sending e-cupcakes*

[Karringtyn]

I am so sorry. You are quite the guy...you have earned LOTS of brownie points. You are a very caring and loving man. I am sorry things didn't work out the way you wanted them to, but your positive attitude is wonderful and refreshing. Harboring bitterness won't do any good.

[Dauntedpoet]

All I can realistically do is take what I've learned from this (and I've learned a lot) and take it with me into the world. To do any less is not only a shame, but a waste. I told her once that she's helped make me a better man, and I truly believe that. Do I let it slide now? Of course not. I carry it with me.

and THAT is exactly why you are still a very valuable part of this community Rusty, don't deprive someone who is struggling in their LDR your experiences and the example of your courage and commitment. HUGS

[Zephii]

I never spoke to you much, but I always liked your posts. You're a good bloke. I hope you come back and visit us some time, just for the hell of it.
I'm sorry too for your heartbreak

[Caity]

I'm sorry to hear about the breakup =/ But if you ever do want to drop in for a natter, we'll all always be here and you will always be welcome. It's good that you have a positive outlook and that you've learned from it and become a better man for it. It takes a really strong person to be like that. Hugs =)