Optimism

[stacyrose]

So I'm just curious where everyone's mentality is on their relationship with their SO. I know most of us have our off days but for the most part, how is everyone feeling about the direction their relationship is going? Are you optimistic or are you feeling discouraged? Do you have any methods to keep yourself motivated when you are feeling hopeless? I know not too long ago I was in a rut where I felt like I was losing David every day...but now I just feel so happy and at this moment I know its gonna work no matter what. It's been a roller coaster but I feel alot more solid than I used to...

What about everyone else?

[Caitlin2009]

well right now i feel like its going in the right direction, i always feel like that unless im in a bad mood

[Miramaid]

I feel like it is a roller coaster and I feel like so far it is not going anywhere far. BUT! I am giving it time and in the mean time I try to think of it as if I am 17 years old still and if this doesn't work smth else will come my way (somehow it helps sometimes coz i KNOW I will never be alone). But of course I would like more certainty and security which I do not have as of right now

[paulawriteslove]

I feel very optimistic I always try to think on the bright side of things and keep positive. I do have some times where I can be sad (usually around that time of the month). But I am very happy with my relationship and where it's going

[Zephii]

This is a great thread idea! It'll be great to see where everyone is at.

I'm optimistic Christmas will be awesome and I can not wait. (nearly!) All the people we love being in one country will do wonders for our relationship.
I do feel ready to step it up another level, and would like to see a bit more progression, but it's not a strong enough compulsion that I'm going to act on it. I'm just ready, that's all. A few times recently Obi has said the S word (soulmate, lol) and that's warm and fuzzy and a tiny bit frightening, even though I don't truly agree with the concept. I can see us lasting forever, inch'allah. (Yes, yes I did steal that from you mllebamako. Hehe)
I love being here for him when he gets home, the comfort we give each other, the way we make time to do things together. Time to work on our friendship and our relationship. I love how he apologizes and takes my feelings into account, and how he pushes me to fulfill my dreams. Life is good!

[Trethsparr]

In regards to how my relationship is progressing, I generally feel very optimistic about it. Like all couples, we have our struggles, but we're really trying hard to keep the lines of communication open about our concerns so that they don't compound on themselves over time. He and I have both had our fears at times about certain issues (i.e. our past bullying that has left us with pretty shaky self-esteem for a long time), and we have both feared (fortunately usually not at the same time) the struggles that come with change.

Marriage will be a huge transition for both of us, and it will require some time to adjust to living together and making the compromises that result from that close proximity. From all accounts, when you live together you get to see the person as they truly are pretty darn quick so we're trying to work through and disclose all possible issues we can so that they don't come as big of a shock later on.

We both took this relationship pretty serious from the get-go because we were looking for a partner for life. We both feel confident in our choice, but the hardest part is that we doubt ourselves and fear disappointing the other person. I do know, though, that we have foundations from common faith, interests/hobbies, sense of humor, and life goals. We've both found a lot of healing in our relationship thus far - healing that, God-willing, we will continue for as long as we are able.

We have loads to learn, and lots of it will be super tough. But we're also excited about the opportunities for personal growth that our marriage will undoubtedly present.

[roosie]

I'm feeling optimistic.. Especially because I will see him in just 10 days after not seeing him for 2 months. I can't wait to be in his arms again. We've been through a lot because of my past but I've learned to trust that he loves me and doesn't want to hurt me. Every time I go to sleep I hope he would wake me up by calling like he often does.. His voice is the first thing I want to hear every morning so I guess that's love.

[SamiWami]

For the most part I feel optimistic aobut our relationship but there are some times where i feel that we are never going to be able to meet. Mostly it's my own doubts, but then out of the blue, he'll send me a message about how he misses me and thinks about me all the time. Then, the doubts go away. he's usually more optimistic which makes me feel so much better about our relationship. I couldn't handle someone who was pessimistic about everything in life. =p

[squiddie]

I'm generally optimistic, but I have days when I wonder if the reason we work so well is because we're NOT around each other every day. But at the same point, we were CD at the beginning of our relationship, for about 10 months, and practically lived together for 3 of those months. So, it's hard to say really.

Generally I think we're going to work and go the distance. Some days I think I'm driving him away, but those are the days when I'm gloom and doom about everything--not just my relationship.

[Yorkshire Girl]

I am very optimistic of our relationship. We are starting to put the roots down for our life together, this time apart is just an obstacle that will be overcome.
All I know is that I love him, so much. And comparing the love I feel for him today to the love I felt for im 4 years ago has changed, into something more magical. I know most things about him, and that is something I treasure.

[Trethsparr]

Generally I think we're going to work and go the distance. Some days I think I'm driving him away, but those are the days when I'm gloom and doom about everything--not just my relationship.

Goodness, I know that feeling all too well. Some days it feels like absolutely nothing is going the way it should...

[mllebamako]

I can see us lasting forever, inch'allah. (Yes, yes I did steal that from you mllebamako. Hehe)

Steal away!! And you didn't steal from me, you borrowed from Islam. After living in 2 Muslim countries, "inch'allah" has become a natural reflex when I talk about the future.

Back to the topic:
I am pretty optimistic. I have no idea what our future holds and we have some challenges in front of us. But we have fared well through challenges in the past. From a challenging living situation to this long distance crap.

But what I know for sure, is that in the deepest part of my soul, that what I hope is that we will stay together until death do us part (inch'allah) and that will we grow together and learn from each other and love until it hurts.

[lucybelle]

I have to say that I am "open minded" about my relationship. I don't like to think I'm pessimistic, but rather "realistic". I know that we might not make it, I know that we might not like each other in the end.. hell we might get married, have children, then get a divorce! I just don't know. What I do know is what my feelings are for him now, and that I want to find out if it will work out. We both feel the same way and it makes me happy to know we're on the same boat. I don't want to say forever right now. Let's make it to Tuesday!

[justbreathe]

I feel like it is a roller coaster and I feel like so far it is not going anywhere far. BUT! I am giving it time and in the mean time I try to think of it as if I am 17 years old still and if this doesn't work smth else will come my way (somehow it helps sometimes coz i KNOW I will never be alone). But of course I would like more certainty and security which I do not have as of right now

I have to say that I am "open minded" about my relationship. I don't like to think I'm pessimistic, but rather "realistic". I know that we might not make it, I know that we might not like each other in the end.. hell we might get married, have children, then get a divorce! I just don't know. What I do know is what my feelings are for him now, and that I want to find out if it will work out. We both feel the same way and it makes me happy to know we're on the same boat. I don't want to say forever right now. Let's make it to Tuesday!

I 95% agree, for me, let's make it to Friday!

I'm young as well and so I try to be realistic of the fact that my first love might not last forever. Sure it's possible, but I haven't heard of many high school sweetheart success stories. Despite that, I try to not be pessimistic about things. I try to ignore comments or things of that nature, even articles online that say LDR's don't last, and try to remember that there is always a chance. Cliche but true: where there is a will, there is a way.

[Silviar]

I always feel like we're rolling in the right direction and almost always feel optimistic. While sometimes the distance and everything else frustrates me, I've never doubted our ability to get together and finish closing the distance. He's such a good guy.