Originally posted by gh0stfl0wers
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What would you do if your SO said things like this to you?
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Originally posted by garnet View PostI have a friend. Her boyfriend said he would take her to hawaii once she lost weight, and propose. Well, she never really did, and a bunch of years later finally he decided he wanted kids so he could be a stay at home dad while she worked. So they got married, and are about to get pregnant with #3. It makes me sick that she put up with his mean weight nagging for soooooooo many years. She's a beautiful girl and deserves so much better.
It's easy to say that I would leave my SO if she treated me this way, but when you're in love it's not really that simple.
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Originally posted by mattheww65 View PostAmen to that sister! I love my SO exactly how she is. She's got a little podgy bit around her belly and I love it! Its so cute when I snuggle and hug her
I think she feels a bit apprehensive (right word?) sometimes when I tell her about all the exercise I do and when she see's me naked because I'm a bit of an fitness-freak so have (or lack) all the bits that come with that... But I just tell her I love every part of her. I'd never ask her to loose weight on my behalf (unless it was affecting her health)... I love her for how amazing she is on the inside as well as how beautiful she is on the outside!
I'll always proud to walk down the street holding her hand and to call her my girlfriend
Originally posted by Elissa View PostIf SO said that to me...wow. Buh-bye!
Originally posted by mllebamako View PostOhh I love that movie!! He is such a jerk though!! Have you watched the 2nd one yet??
Anyway, I would not put up with that crap. But there was a time, in high school, when my self esteem was really low and I might have put up with it then.
The other day when I was talking about how I'm going to be lonely all weekend and I was just going to buy a few bottles of wine and lock myself in my bedroom with a pizza he was like baby I think you should be original and eat something other than pizza. Totally joking I asked him if he was telling me I shouldn't be eating so much pizza?! He was just like "well... I don't want to say that, you just need to start working out babe. But I love you anyway". He knows that I want to lose wait for me and is being supportive and it's awesome.
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My ex husband used to make comments if I put on pounds, saying that I looked "crapped out" and I "let myself go"... I had 2 children in 2 year's time, so it took a toll on my body. Plus, I am an emotional eater and since he was a jerk, I was eating to make myself feel better, which didn't help matters. Obviously, he is an ex husband for a reason! I have lost 40 lbs since being with my boyfriend and when we first started our relationship I was on the chubby side. I was paranoid about my appearance and he always said "You're beautiful, you're hot, you have nothing to be ashamed of." He has really built up my self esteem, not that I need others to build up my self esteem, but it helped. So, in other words, I wouldn't put up with that anymore because I know what it can do to your self image. I know there are men out there that accept me for who I am, and there's no need to waste my time with those who do not.
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I dealt with emotional and physical abuse in a relationship for over two years before meeting my current SO. I was belittled in every way. Nothing I did was good enough for him. I wasn't good enough. Not even my freckles were the right color. But I've been working on developing my self-esteem. So I have to say that as much as I love my boyfriend, I would break up with him if he were to become verbally abusive. I don't deserve it. Thankfully my guy has been nothing but very supportive and loving though. He's the one, along with my former counselor, who helped me see there might be something about me worth keeping.
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Originally posted by Laura024 View PostI dealt with emotional and physical abuse in a relationship for over two years before meeting my current SO. I was belittled in every way. Nothing I did was good enough for him. I wasn't good enough. Not even my freckles were the right color. But I've been working on developing my self-esteem. So I have to say that as much as I love my boyfriend, I would break up with him if he were to become verbally abusive. I don't deserve it. Thankfully my guy has been nothing but very supportive and loving though. He's the one, along with my former counselor, who helped me see there might be something about me worth keeping.
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Originally posted by LadyMarchHare View PostConsidering I'm overweight, if my SO ever DARED tell me something like "lose x amount of pounds and I'll love you" I'd tell him to grow x amount of brain cells and I'd love him back.
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Originally posted by mllebamako View PostOhh I love that movie!! He is such a jerk though!! Have you watched the 2nd one yet??
Anyway, I would not put up with that crap. But there was a time, in high school, when my self esteem was really low and I might have put up with it then.
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At this point my boy and I know each other well enough that he would never even suggest such a thing to me. He knows I'm extremely self coscious and insecure about my weight and even just a "playful" type of teasing or "help" would not go over well with me. A few months back I did ask for his help to support my in losing some pounds but he refused and said I was fine the way I am and that I don't need to change. Alhough I am still dieting now if he suddenly out of the blue decided to support me now unlike he did a few months ago I would be quite panicked and wonder why he changed his mind.
However. This is my answer now, after being with my SO for over a year who understand how my mind works when it comes to weight. If say I was dating someone else and from the beginning he suggested tips on how to make myself thinner, whil my gut reaction is to say this probably isn't someone I would stay long term with, I do know I'd probably be with him for awhile. I have very little support elsewhere in my dieting goals and if he pushed me on from the start I could use it as motivation. I know it's twisted to say I would like it but if my SO did it now that'd be a huge blow, but that's because all the way till now he's told me he's loved me no matter how I look and it would seriously crush me if he did a complete 180 on that. Not sure if that made sense but there you go.
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Originally posted by __ms.jaye View PostOkay one, good movie so is the sequel and the third one tee hee . But yes if my SO ever spoke to me like that we'd be done, like I could find a man who loves my curves. But he loves my body so i'm not worried. ♥
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