My initial reaction when I read the opening post was that... maybe your best friend has feelings for you. If there's truly no grounds for the things he said.
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No announcement yet.
Just a little.. I don't know.
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I think that asking him why he said what he said might be a good idea so that you can actually figure out if he genuinely believes that you have no chemistry and what he bases that impression off, or if he is just trying to stir things up so he can get with you.
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Originally posted by Lexi View PostIt definitely sounds like jealously. And some people just don't understand LDR and won't be easily convinced that it's important to you and your SO.
This is very true. Maybe he feels threatened that there is another guy in your life taking time away from him. Especially if you have dated before. Those feelings never fully go away. It really makes me wonder, especially the part where commented on his looks. It seems like some sort of insecurity to me. I hope that helps even a little bit!Live.Laugh.Love.ALWAYS.
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Whatever you do, don't let what your friend said poison your relationship. If it causes you to second-guess yourself, it will eat away at you, and recovering from that can be really hard. Just trust yourself and know that YOU are the only one that can really know the full story of what's going on in your relationship.
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Unfortunately, I know exactly what you are talking about. I had a lot of "friends" very loudly voice their doubts about our relationship - "he's not attractive" "he's not smart" "he's fat" "he isn't like you at all" "he's a nerd" "can you even be attracted to him?" "why the hell are you with him?" "you won't last the distance" - so on and so forth.
Really hurtful things basically. Most of those "friends" are no longer in my life. The ones that are have become really good friends with him since and obviously their opinion of him has changed. The majority of these comments came from jealous guys. So the best advice I can give to you, is to give them the opportunity to meet, and if they still don't get on after a few meetings, I would just distance myself from them, either permanetely or until they get the hint you are staying with them despite their opinion. Or just tell them that their opinion is hurtful and unwanted.
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This is partially why I say the ex gets no say in your future relationships. It doesn't matter what the nature of the relationship was, how you broke up, why you broke up, what feelings lingered or didn't linger after, if one or both of you started dating the other gender right after, if the break up was due to amnesia, ect. The ex is always somewhat biased, no mater how much they try not to be. Unless it's something obvious like cheating, abuse, or something with proof then exes shouldn't bring up relationship issues. I'd never give my exes relationship advice or tell them how I see their relationship. I'm still not in a position to speak clearly.
I can't tell you his motive, just that he doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut :P. That's also part of the reason I don't let my friends voice their opinions on my relationship. They're idiots who can't tell a happy relationship from a lie and are too damn close minded to realize not all relationships are the same. Then again, my friends suck epicly at relationships XP.
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Like others have said, you have to think of your friends motivations in saying these things. Unless what he said was coming from a place of true concern b/c your SO is abusive or mean or something, I would reconsider this "friendship".
Don't let what others say get you down. Only YOU and your SO truly know your relationship.
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