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Your SO not keeping they're words!

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    Your SO not keeping they're words!

    I was just wondering if any of you guys suffers or goes through the same shit sometimes as me. Like i would phone him and if he's busy he said would i still be awake at 12am i said "yes" and he said he'll IM me then. But maybe i'm being paranoid and all but it happens many times like he said he would contact me again but never kept his words! URGH! Mens!

    #2
    Yeah that has happened with me before...I have a fear that because I'm not there with my SO he is not making me a priority...but he could tell I was getting upset by it when he would tell me that he would call me or text me and didn't...and he told me that there would never come a day when he would intentionally not talk to me...he loved talking to me and if we weren't talking it was because he wasn't able to (he gets really busy). So I say talk to your SO about how it makes you feel and come up with a way to resolve it. Sometimes the time difference makes it harder too...I know my SO has told me that a lot of times and I have stayed up but if he doesn't contact me its usually because he is asleep (3 hour time difference) I'm sad but I learn to understand. Another thing is that because we are apart we spend more time talking than anything else in a LDR...probably a lot more than a CDR so keep that in mind too some people aren't used to having to contact someone all the time. I hope this helps a bit; don't worry you are not alone :-)

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      #3
      You definitely need to tell him how you feel. You need to tell him that if he's not 100% sure that he's going to be available to contact you at the proposed time, that he should just say that he will talk to you later.

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        #4
        I know how that felt it happened a lot over the spring, but it was worse it was him coming to see me and for some reason it wouldn't happen... but good thing that stopped though. But I think you should do the same thing to him give him his own taste of medicine because no offense but men respond better to actions than words, also I don't know but I don't think a lot of guys respond to "feelings" because with my honey I tried the feelings talk but nothing would ever change. So I think actions are better like tease him and don't call him for one or two day that'll get him. Light a fire under his butt and make him chase you so he can listen to you. So don't be afraid to get mean nuh uh! Overall men are like this= Action> Words how do I know? Personal experience and also from the lovely book of "Why Men Love Bitches?" (Great book and very true )
        Last edited by xopookie; December 16, 2010, 01:02 PM.

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          #5
          Um, I think it's just a guy thing. That's how they're wired. I don't mind it because I just send him a friendly reminder and he remembers and then we either talk or postpone it and all's good and that's all there is to it. I don't worry about things like that. Forcing him to talk isn't gonna make talking very fun at all, I want us both to be available and in the mood to talk, because all that comes out of force is guilt and unhappiness and fighting.

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            #6
            Hmm. I know if a booked time to talk is postphoned its usually for a reason. So its not normally a problem. Though it does get to me when I get all excited about being able to tell him about my day and then I can't...

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              #7
              guys thanks alot for all the advices! i was really sad cause sometimes not only about this calling and keeping his words issues bothers me. It bothers me how it seems like i would be on IM 24/7 just in case he wants to talk me or check hows my day and all but i can go all day with disappointments as theres no messages. And cause i bought the international calling card, i'm always the one making calls. And he don't seem to be as excited to talk to me as i am.

              Which makes me think this relationship is kinda imbalance as it makes me feel i love him more than he does. Cause he gives me the "i dont really give a damn" feeling =(

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                #8
                my boyfriend did it to me a few times, it annoyed me, so I told him not to tell me he will text me... because I don't need him to think about me when he is out and texting me, but I don't like when he says so and eventually doesn't do that he told me though that he just didn't want to wake me up after the night out, but he doesn't tell me anymore that he will text me and that keeps us both happy

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                  #9
                  Yeah, Mark does this all the time. He will say, I'll call you back..and he never does... I talked to him about this, and he has been really good about doing what he says. You should talk to your SO about it

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                    #10
                    My boyfriend has a tendency to say he'll call in a minute, then a few hours later he'll finally ring me. It's a little frustrating, because sometimes I'm waiting by the phone rather than going around and doing things. So if I'm starting to feel antsy about it, and especially if it's getting late, I send him a text saying something along the lines of "Hey, still have time to chat? If not it's okay, just let me know." Because then he'll come back and let me know what's going on and give me a much better approximation as to when he'll ACTUALLY be calling, and if he really has time to chat or if it'll just be a quick good night. Good things to know.


                    "You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty."
                    -- Anonymous

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                      #11
                      Oh yeah I've been complaining about it alot. In my case he'd say I'll call you in a little bit, so I would be waiting around for him, keeping my phone close by and all and then I'd see him online and he'd be playing a game on his xbox and I'd wait and wait and wait thinking he'll call me after he plays a match >.> only he just keeps playing all night. I'll fall asleep wake up and sign on again and he'd still be playing.
                      >.> we had a lot of fights about this actually.
                      He says he never does it on purpose he says he just gets absentminded.
                      My advice is you better talk about now and hopefully he's more understanding than my bf
                      good luck

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