I went to meet my boyfriend in November for the first time after dating online for five years. 
People have been telling me for a long time that you can't really love someone you met online. That you don't know them or your physical chemistry or how they actually talk. I never believed them, but now I can say we really proved them wrong. It was the best week of my entire life and we were even better together in person. 
I took a Greyhound bus to Kentucky which went pretty well until a bunch of Mennonites bought tickets and took all the spots on my bus just two stations away from my destination. . . The customer service guy issued me a new ticket for a bus to the next station that would be coming two hours later. :\ There was a 12 hour layover once I got to that station an hour and a half away from where I needed to go! ._. I asked the guy about it and he told me that if I went to customer service at the next station they'd get me a cab to where I needed to go and everything would be great. He was really nice. At the next station I took my ticket to customer service which took half an hour to come and talk to me. And then they took another half an hour deciding what to do. The manager came up and said a cab would cost her too much for just one person and the best she'd do was get me a hotel. A lady sitting beside me said I'd best take that hotel because I didn't want to see that station at night. o.o;
This wouldn't do.
I was supposed to be meeting him that day!! I was only an hour and a half away. I never cry in front of anyone. Except Logan. But I was feeling hopeless and terrible and I thought it might help me somehow. >.>; So I did let myself this one time. A security guard came up and was like, "Baby girl, what's wrong? Hmmm? Come on and tell me."
My throat was really tight from crying so I couldn't talk well, but I managed to tell him what happened and that I was stuck without a cab but I had to get there that day. He told me to wait and he'd change the manager's mind. So I did and after an houuur the manager came and said, "Ma'am? There's a cab coming to get you, so wait by this door."
!!!!! And 15 minutes later he showed up! This was my first taxi ride. After my first bus ride. lol
On my way there I asked Logan not to be late because the station was in a not so nice part of town. Then my phone died. Logan and his friend showed up right as we parked, which was awesome. The entire time I was on my way there I never once let myself feel nervous or weird but when he got out of his friend's car and was walking toward me, my brain was bewildered! This was Logan. My Logan. And he was there. With a body. Oh my God, he had a body! o.O I felt suddenly not quiite ready. But standing right there, you can't run or anything, so. . . XD
He came up and he was like, "Hey." which was kind of funny to me because it was the first thing he'd ever said to me in FFXI 5 years ago. XD And I said hey back and gave him a hug! Which he wiggled out of and asked me about bags to carry. Mean guy. So the cab driver gave him my bag and Logan took me to his friend's car. He sat in the back seat with me on the way back. And I tried really hard to look like he was welcome to touch me and talk to me with body language. >_> But his body language was completely different. I felt totally not awkward but he looked like he felt awkward. . . I ignored it and talked to him and his friend. I really really wanted to hold his hand. I started digging around in my purse for a notebook to tell him I really wanted to touch him but I didn't have one. >.< And he asked what I was looking for so I told him. And I told him I couldn't text him because my phone had died. He asked why I needed something to talk to him with and I said, "I can't say what I want to." "Why can't you?" so I looked at his friend and he took out his phone and typed "Because of Erik?" and I nodded. So he gave me his phone and I typed in that I really wished I could touch him but I didn't want to be rude to his friend. And he looked at me like he understood. He still wouldn't hold my hand though!
Thankfully it didn't take too long to get back to his school. Logan took me up to his dorm and as soon as we got there I said, "We need to hug like we should have before now." so we did for a long time and it felt really good. I asked him why he wiggled away before and he said he didn't want me to cry! LOL I know I totally would have, too, so I guess it was a smart move.
After that I hopped onto his bed and managed to get him to sit with me. >.> Then I convinced him he should lay with me, so he laid down on the bed with me and I cuddled up beside him. It was the most amazing feeling in the world. The entire world. I kept stroking his hair and his face and chest and sometimes just holding him tightly and he held me, too. I half couldn't believe that it was finally happening, because this was the one thing we both wanted physically more than anything else. And it felt so perfect. I never felt awkward. I felt like I knew him perfectly well and this was right. And he said he did too.
(Our first picture ever together because we were really happy and we looked down and loved how our hands looked together.)
*coughs* That was when trouble came up because being so close to him and looking at him and touching him started getting me kind of excited after awhile. Neither one of us had ever done any of that stuff before and I told him long before that I would be ready! XD But he said he might not be. . . so I told him I had to get up. But he held on to me and told me he wanted me to stay. I said I haaad to stop this and tried to get up and he looked sad and asked me why. I think I might have made him feel like I suddenly realized this wasn't what I wanted. ._. So I kind of explained. . . "Because if you knew what I was thinking right now you'd be pretty disappointed with my brain! I have to go. o_o" but he pulled me up against him and asked me why again. "Because. . ." I said. "Tell me," he whispered and nuzzled his face up next to my ear. "I can't tell you because I'm a terrible person, Logan." So he kept whispering for me to tell him and getting closer with his nuzzling and I was stubborn about things. And that's how he ended up kissing me for the first time. And thenn when he started getting inappropriate with his cuddles while he asked me to tell him I told him that he obviously already knew!! And he said he totally did but wanted me to say it XD, so I said, "Being right here with you and holding you and touching you like this is making me want you and I know I shouldn't right now when I just got here." "It's okay," he said, "I want you to."
>.> I've never been so extremely excited in my liiife. So we cuddled really tightly and kissed and heavy petted all the way. Would you consider that losing your virginity? I guess not. But it meant the same thing to me. It was the most perfect thing that could possibly have happened between us right then and I still can't stop thinking about it. Not that other stuff didn't happen later!
After that we cuddled and talked and he took me to get food at the most adooorable of places. And it was really tasty!! And we held hands while walking through town at night and he took me to a cute little shop. The kind that I love. And we cuddled on a couch together when we got back and talked. And then we went back to his room and were going to watch Monster House, but we didn't quite make it through that because our minds were on other things. . . And after we did other things, we both went to sleep cuddling together. Things couldn't possibly have gone better. I absolutely loved him even more than I thought I did. Being with him is better than I imagined and he treats me like I'm the most precious thing in the world. Q_Q
I'll just tell you about our first day because a whole week is a really long story! XD Other than a few important (to me) things!
Like that he whispers he loves me a lot when he's half asleep and it's adorable. And that he kissed me on the lips and told me he loved me before bed when he thought I was sleeping one night. And that the morning after our first day together, waking up to him holding me was amazing. And the day I left he held me all the time even though his mom isn't supposed to know how much we love each other yet. And he talked for me when I couldn't because my throat was too tight and sore from crying. And while his mom was driving me to the bus station, he took out his phone and typed, "I'm really lucky to have someone who loves me as much as you do." for me and hugged me really tight. And the morning of the day I left, he climbed into bed with me and was telling me he didn't want me to go. . .
He was the best in the whole world. I'm almost making myself cry typing this because I miss being with him so much.
Leaving was one of the worst things ever. I've never cried so much and not been able to hold it back like that with anything. And I may be romantic and squishy but I'm not a really really wimpy bawly person. . . Does it ever get any easier? I feel like I belong with him and it isn't right that I'm leaving and not taking care of him. . .
P.S. Here are pictures. The cat is the bus station cat who cheers the people up. <3 Logan was playing with him. Haha. <3!
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People have been telling me for a long time that you can't really love someone you met online. That you don't know them or your physical chemistry or how they actually talk. I never believed them, but now I can say we really proved them wrong. It was the best week of my entire life and we were even better together in person. I took a Greyhound bus to Kentucky which went pretty well until a bunch of Mennonites bought tickets and took all the spots on my bus just two stations away from my destination. . . The customer service guy issued me a new ticket for a bus to the next station that would be coming two hours later. :\ There was a 12 hour layover once I got to that station an hour and a half away from where I needed to go! ._. I asked the guy about it and he told me that if I went to customer service at the next station they'd get me a cab to where I needed to go and everything would be great. He was really nice. At the next station I took my ticket to customer service which took half an hour to come and talk to me. And then they took another half an hour deciding what to do. The manager came up and said a cab would cost her too much for just one person and the best she'd do was get me a hotel. A lady sitting beside me said I'd best take that hotel because I didn't want to see that station at night. o.o;
This wouldn't do.
I was supposed to be meeting him that day!! I was only an hour and a half away. I never cry in front of anyone. Except Logan. But I was feeling hopeless and terrible and I thought it might help me somehow. >.>; So I did let myself this one time. A security guard came up and was like, "Baby girl, what's wrong? Hmmm? Come on and tell me."My throat was really tight from crying so I couldn't talk well, but I managed to tell him what happened and that I was stuck without a cab but I had to get there that day. He told me to wait and he'd change the manager's mind. So I did and after an houuur the manager came and said, "Ma'am? There's a cab coming to get you, so wait by this door."
!!!!! And 15 minutes later he showed up! This was my first taxi ride. After my first bus ride. lolOn my way there I asked Logan not to be late because the station was in a not so nice part of town. Then my phone died. Logan and his friend showed up right as we parked, which was awesome. The entire time I was on my way there I never once let myself feel nervous or weird but when he got out of his friend's car and was walking toward me, my brain was bewildered! This was Logan. My Logan. And he was there. With a body. Oh my God, he had a body! o.O I felt suddenly not quiite ready. But standing right there, you can't run or anything, so. . . XD
He came up and he was like, "Hey." which was kind of funny to me because it was the first thing he'd ever said to me in FFXI 5 years ago. XD And I said hey back and gave him a hug! Which he wiggled out of and asked me about bags to carry.
Mean guy. So the cab driver gave him my bag and Logan took me to his friend's car. He sat in the back seat with me on the way back. And I tried really hard to look like he was welcome to touch me and talk to me with body language. >_> But his body language was completely different. I felt totally not awkward but he looked like he felt awkward. . . I ignored it and talked to him and his friend. I really really wanted to hold his hand. I started digging around in my purse for a notebook to tell him I really wanted to touch him but I didn't have one. >.< And he asked what I was looking for so I told him. And I told him I couldn't text him because my phone had died. He asked why I needed something to talk to him with and I said, "I can't say what I want to." "Why can't you?" so I looked at his friend and he took out his phone and typed "Because of Erik?" and I nodded. So he gave me his phone and I typed in that I really wished I could touch him but I didn't want to be rude to his friend. And he looked at me like he understood. He still wouldn't hold my hand though!Thankfully it didn't take too long to get back to his school. Logan took me up to his dorm and as soon as we got there I said, "We need to hug like we should have before now." so we did for a long time and it felt really good. I asked him why he wiggled away before and he said he didn't want me to cry! LOL I know I totally would have, too, so I guess it was a smart move.
After that I hopped onto his bed and managed to get him to sit with me. >.> Then I convinced him he should lay with me, so he laid down on the bed with me and I cuddled up beside him. It was the most amazing feeling in the world. The entire world. I kept stroking his hair and his face and chest and sometimes just holding him tightly and he held me, too. I half couldn't believe that it was finally happening, because this was the one thing we both wanted physically more than anything else. And it felt so perfect. I never felt awkward. I felt like I knew him perfectly well and this was right. And he said he did too.
(Our first picture ever together because we were really happy and we looked down and loved how our hands looked together.)
*coughs* That was when trouble came up because being so close to him and looking at him and touching him started getting me kind of excited after awhile. Neither one of us had ever done any of that stuff before and I told him long before that I would be ready! XD But he said he might not be. . . so I told him I had to get up. But he held on to me and told me he wanted me to stay. I said I haaad to stop this and tried to get up and he looked sad and asked me why. I think I might have made him feel like I suddenly realized this wasn't what I wanted. ._. So I kind of explained. . . "Because if you knew what I was thinking right now you'd be pretty disappointed with my brain! I have to go. o_o" but he pulled me up against him and asked me why again. "Because. . ." I said. "Tell me," he whispered and nuzzled his face up next to my ear. "I can't tell you because I'm a terrible person, Logan." So he kept whispering for me to tell him and getting closer with his nuzzling and I was stubborn about things. And that's how he ended up kissing me for the first time. And thenn when he started getting inappropriate with his cuddles while he asked me to tell him I told him that he obviously already knew!! And he said he totally did but wanted me to say it XD, so I said, "Being right here with you and holding you and touching you like this is making me want you and I know I shouldn't right now when I just got here." "It's okay," he said, "I want you to."
>.> I've never been so extremely excited in my liiife. So we cuddled really tightly and kissed and heavy petted all the way. Would you consider that losing your virginity? I guess not. But it meant the same thing to me. It was the most perfect thing that could possibly have happened between us right then and I still can't stop thinking about it. Not that other stuff didn't happen later!
After that we cuddled and talked and he took me to get food at the most adooorable of places. And it was really tasty!! And we held hands while walking through town at night and he took me to a cute little shop. The kind that I love. And we cuddled on a couch together when we got back and talked. And then we went back to his room and were going to watch Monster House, but we didn't quite make it through that because our minds were on other things. . . And after we did other things, we both went to sleep cuddling together. Things couldn't possibly have gone better. I absolutely loved him even more than I thought I did. Being with him is better than I imagined and he treats me like I'm the most precious thing in the world. Q_Q
I'll just tell you about our first day because a whole week is a really long story! XD Other than a few important (to me) things!
Like that he whispers he loves me a lot when he's half asleep and it's adorable. And that he kissed me on the lips and told me he loved me before bed when he thought I was sleeping one night. And that the morning after our first day together, waking up to him holding me was amazing. And the day I left he held me all the time even though his mom isn't supposed to know how much we love each other yet. And he talked for me when I couldn't because my throat was too tight and sore from crying. And while his mom was driving me to the bus station, he took out his phone and typed, "I'm really lucky to have someone who loves me as much as you do." for me and hugged me really tight. And the morning of the day I left, he climbed into bed with me and was telling me he didn't want me to go. . .
He was the best in the whole world.
I'm almost making myself cry typing this because I miss being with him so much.Leaving was one of the worst things ever.
I've never cried so much and not been able to hold it back like that with anything. And I may be romantic and squishy but I'm not a really really wimpy bawly person. . . Does it ever get any easier? I feel like I belong with him and it isn't right that I'm leaving and not taking care of him. . .P.S. Here are pictures. The cat is the bus station cat who cheers the people up. <3 Logan was playing with him. Haha. <3!
~*Click!*~
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