Update Or A Goodbye To LFAD [Part 2]
December 17th I was with my best friend and she was with me when I called his dad one more time. His dad said my SO will be home for Christmas and that he was going to be picking him up Christmas eve, he told me that my SO talked to his sister and said he would be home for a couple of weeks. I asked his dad where is he living and stuff and his dad said I don’t know what he’s been up to other then work he’s been working and I asked if he was doing his music his dad said no. So I cut the conversation and we said our goodbyes and he said he will try to have him call me (Once again full of shit in my opinion).
My best friend suggest that I call Christmas day and if he answers for me to just say that I am calling to wish him a Merry Christmas and if he would like to talk to me he can call me the next day, she thinks that will get him to think of me and give him the night to think about talking to me or something. I hope she may be right.
I have been trying to move on and do my own thing, its hard for me to just forget him but its hard for me to just drop 2 years of someone being there for and being my best friend, I’m shocked with his actions and extremely hurt he has never done this to me and I don’t know if its something he may be going through right now. But how can you do this after 2 years. I Love Him very much and he will always own my heart, Its just hard to believe that there may be hope and I’m lacking the hope part.
The reason why this is so long (I summarized it to the basic) is because I have been too embarrassed and ashamed to come back to LFAD mainly because I feel like I don’t even belong here because me and my SO seem to be no longer active I guess even though there was no agreement on a “Its Over” basis or an official “Break” He left it the way I have said and I have been hurting and sad because this is not like him at all.
I hope all of you can be supportive even if I no longer belong here despite my heart still being in it. I don’t wear my LDR bracelet anymore because I feel like I don’t count as a LDR anymore I feel like an outsider looking in and I am happy all of you have been strong and still together, If this is my last post or time here I may delete my account due to really not being an LDR at this point until something changes. I feel hopeless and broken that I’ve lost my best friend and lover. I wish you all the best in your relationships and hope you are all able to keep over riding your problems that come and stay strong. I thought we really would make it and maybe there is a chance but I don’t know.
Happy Holidays everyone and God bless
My best friend suggest that I call Christmas day and if he answers for me to just say that I am calling to wish him a Merry Christmas and if he would like to talk to me he can call me the next day, she thinks that will get him to think of me and give him the night to think about talking to me or something. I hope she may be right.
I have been trying to move on and do my own thing, its hard for me to just forget him but its hard for me to just drop 2 years of someone being there for and being my best friend, I’m shocked with his actions and extremely hurt he has never done this to me and I don’t know if its something he may be going through right now. But how can you do this after 2 years. I Love Him very much and he will always own my heart, Its just hard to believe that there may be hope and I’m lacking the hope part.
The reason why this is so long (I summarized it to the basic) is because I have been too embarrassed and ashamed to come back to LFAD mainly because I feel like I don’t even belong here because me and my SO seem to be no longer active I guess even though there was no agreement on a “Its Over” basis or an official “Break” He left it the way I have said and I have been hurting and sad because this is not like him at all.
I hope all of you can be supportive even if I no longer belong here despite my heart still being in it. I don’t wear my LDR bracelet anymore because I feel like I don’t count as a LDR anymore I feel like an outsider looking in and I am happy all of you have been strong and still together, If this is my last post or time here I may delete my account due to really not being an LDR at this point until something changes. I feel hopeless and broken that I’ve lost my best friend and lover. I wish you all the best in your relationships and hope you are all able to keep over riding your problems that come and stay strong. I thought we really would make it and maybe there is a chance but I don’t know.
Happy Holidays everyone and God bless