I was the worst Girlfriend.

[SnowDust]

So. Yesterday my Boyfriends boss calls him and asks him to go to Vancouver for the Olympics, and that he has to leave today. My boyfriend tells me this and what did I do? Start crying like a baby.

The problem is that he wont be starting work daily until 10am. By that time its already afternoon for me. He wont be getting home from work until after 10:30pm... which of course is after 2:30am my time. His job is very demanding and when he has to travel for work he is working 12 hour days, and is extremley busy. At the very most I might get a few text messages, maybe an email.

Its so hard to go from a CDR to an LDR because for half of our relationship I was used to seeing him everyday. We lived together, were a happy, normal, everyday couple. Now the only thing we have is our phone conversations, our constant texts and emails. The phone calls are all we have. Now for a week I have nothing. I know is sounds so childish and whiney but I'm really upset about it.

Of course, I am excited for him, and I know he is going to have so much fun! What an experience! I just hate that I am so insecure and so needy that the idea of 6 days without a phone call or even a daily text is making me so upset.

When we lived together and he would go away for a night or two and be too busy with work and meetings to call it didnt bother me as much. But when I havent seen him in a few weeks and can't talk to him on top of that it drives me insane.

I just feel so bad for crying when he told me instead of being excited for him. I feel like I took away some of his excitement and thats not fair.

[Tanja]

Well you can't help at how you feel so don't feel too guilty. You can still be excited for him but there are always two sides on the coin and I'm sure he'll understand that and knows you can't be very happy that he's going away for 6 days. But it's only 6 days, some people in LDRs get sent away for months and months and they're not even allowed a phone call so things could be worse.

Hope you'll feel better soon and keep watching the olympics, maybe you'll see him on tv

[lunamea]

I know how you feel, because I used to (and partly still) do this to my husband as well. Even if it isn't anything as exciting as the Olympics, just him mentioning that he might have to go to a work training in another county for a week etc. sent me into a fit and afterwards, I felt bad for not being happy for him. As Taija said, you can't help the way you feel and I'm sure your bf rather wants you to express your true emotions than mask your disappointment and lie. I think once that initial disappointment is over, you'll be able to be truly happy for him.

I know it's hard to go for 6 days with hardly anything, but also see the upsides: you'll both be so excited and happy to talk again after this period, and you'll have so much to tell each other! Plus, you're not not talking because you're angry at each other, but just because circumstances won't allow. And, even if he can't reply, you can still write him emails/texts to let him know you're thinking of him. The 6 days will pass fast, I'm sure! I know the advice is always the same, but keeping busy is really the best thing you can do.

[A Silence in Winter]

My boyfriend and I often go through something similar. Last summer I went on an exchange program to Japan for two weeks. Because of the nature of the program, I could hardly ever talk to him and only for about ten minutes at a time. Because, like you, we did see each other everyday, it was VERY hard for him. He smiled and was sweet about it, but I could tell it hurt him. His mother told me that he was SO depressed while I was away and really looked dead. )=

Now he's away at college and although I am so excited that he is getting his education and has filled his life with fun activities he couldn't do at home such as karate and language studies, I can't help but yearn for him. When he left, I was bawling. I really should have been happy for his new adventure, but it was so hard knowing that he was no longer just down the street from me.

What I told him was that I was so happy to see him doing something so important for himself but I hated seeing him leave and I wish I could have been there for him. No, he probably doesn't want to see you sad, but sometimes you just can't hold it in. Last time he had to go back down, we BOTH cried. ;.;

There are a couple things my boyfriend and I did to cope with absences.

The first was that my boyfriend and I both write each other love letters and emails. Even if he can't receive them immediately, when he DOES get them, he will be so happy to see them! Just about every three days I was in Japan my boyfriend sent me emails telling me how much he loved and missed me. IT WAS SO TOUCHING!!! I simply melted when I received them.

Now that my boyfriend is down in college, when he's in class and I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to talk to him, I write him a letter. Sometimes it's a mushy love letter depicting my feelings. Other times it's just a letter written as if I was talking to him. When I was stuck in Salt Lake City airport last Sunday, I wrote him how bored I was. It helps me cope with his absence, especially when I can't physically talk to him.

And again, even though you can't talk to him immediately, I'm sure it will make him smile when he returns to see that you love him and truly did miss him.

Don't worry, you're not a bad girlfriend! You just really love your man. =)

[Italia10]

Stay strong! I have felt this way too. My SO works in Italy and he travels every weekend. So we dont get to talk 3-4 days out of the week cuz of time differences/schedules. It really sucks and, like you, I was used to seeing him several times a week. If you feel bad about crying, just tell him how you feel because you ARE happy for him. He probably knows that already tho!! XOXO

[SnowDust]

Thanks guys! We have been Long Distance for the past year, and going from CDR to that was hard enough. It kind of feels like all we have is our phone calls/texts/emails. Its just gonna be hard to go so long without hearing from him. Haha all my friends in relationships think it would be great if their boyfriends would go away for a couple of days so they could have the house to themselves... they have no idea how much it sucks. Again though, thanks. I guess I just needed to rant about it all.

[SnowDust]

Well its been almost 2 days, and I miss him like crazy but I am super happy for him! He actually got to go to the Canada VS Russia hockey game last night! Haha I was soooo jealous (especially because he doesnt even LOVE hockey like I do!)

Just can't wait for Monday so I can really talk to him again. Then its only 1 more week until I fly out to see him

[Mio]

Yay, look Monday is around the corner!

[A Silence in Winter]

YAY! =] I'm glad everything worked out okay. -hugs-

[Tanja]

Well its been almost 2 days, and I miss him like crazy but I am super happy for him! He actually got to go to the Canada VS Russia hockey game last night! Haha I was soooo jealous (especially because he doesnt even LOVE hockey like I do!)

Just can't wait for Monday so I can really talk to him again. Then its only 1 more week until I fly out to see him

Omg I would've LOVED to go see that game!!! I'm so jealous!

[Taija]

I haven't exactly been in the same situation, but that feeling is still familiar and, in my opinion, completely understandable. In LDRs the communication is always limited and when you have give up even that for several days, it's only natural that you would get upset - it doesn't mean that you're not happy for him.

But hang in there, the 6 days will pass faster than you think!

[SnowDust]

Bloody Hell, I heard from him last night <a phone call! > and he still doesn't know when he is coming back. His boss originally said 4-5 days which meant flying home tonight/tomorrow, but he has yet to be told about a flight and they haven't given him any indication about when he comes home.

He does get to go to the Closing Ceremonies tonight (which is SO cool!) but I dont think he will be home tomorrow, like I originally hoped.

I'm kind of nervous though. I have surgery on Thursday and am flying out to see him on Saturday to recover with him, but what if they keep him in Vancouver!! Not to mention that I am crazy nervous about the sugery so being able to talk to him now would be awesome. I just miss him so much.

[William]

My SO works in music events; she's sometimes away for 3 weeks, and we hardly talk. You get used to it, because you know it's alright.

[SnowDust]

I know it's alright, just dissapointing when the dates change. I'm crazy excited for him, that he is getting to do so much stuff out there, I just wish I knew when he was coming home. I would not take this opportunity away from him at all, its amazing all thats he has got to do this week (The Olympics!).

Haha I don't think theres anyone on this forum who wouldn't be a little dissapointed if the dates that they could talk/see/communicate with their SO changed. Unless of course if was an earlier date!

[A Silence in Winter]

Haha I don't think theres anyone on this forum who wouldn't be a little dissapointed if the dates that they could talk/see/communicate with their SO changed. Unless of course if was an earlier date!

Of course not! The times at which I see my boyfriend change weekly. I thought I would be able to see him this weekend but something came up. )= I think many of us know how that feels... and it isn't good! D:

I'm sure he's doing his very best to come home so he can be with you in your recovery. I wouldn't stress too much about it because there is nothing you can do to change it, right? Don't worry about things you can't change. Just have faith and if he's not home when you get there, will he let you have a key so you can get in and just rest there? If not, then how about a hotel?

Don't worry, it will work out. :3 And I'm SURE your surgery will turn out just fine. The doctors are professionals and know what they're doing. ^^ I've had three already (not even 18) and so far I haven't had any problems. -hugs- It'll all work out okay! ^^