I have never posted in these forums. But I was wondering if I could get some feedback on my failed LDR, from people who are in similar circumstances. I just keep asking myself what went wrong.
I dated this girl for a month in a half in the summer, it was very intense, both of us felt strongly for each other, or so it seemed. Sadly she had to go to back to school in Europe in early October.
When she first got over there we talked everyday and we had great convos. I missed her but I was happy. I booked a plane ticket to see her for a month over Christmas and New Years.
After a few weeks it was like someone flipped a switch on her. She changed overnight it seemed. She would pick arguments with me over minor bullshit, telling me I shouldn't come *just* to see her, and I should come to see Europe. She seemed to have less and less interest in the relationship and she showed less affection. We stopped talking everyday. Her school schedule took up a lot of her time and I understood that, but whenever we did talk all she would do is complain, or we would fight, and she would show no affection at all ( unless she was drinking it seemed). She would spend all day watching TV all day then when I was ready to chat she said she had homework and was busy now. While I would try to schedule my day so I would have time to talk to her.
I tried to talk about the issues but she always pushed it off and said she didn’t want to talk right then. I felt quite upset about this because here I am making such a big investment and sacrifice to go over there and spend Christmas with her.
This caused me to act needy and tell her that I felt things weren't going good and I couldn't go on in a relationship like that. I felt things weren’t going well so I felt I had to bring it up. But maybe it drove her further away. I asked her if things were okay and told her I was worrying 3 – 4 times over a month.
She would tell me that I bring that up all the time and I'm driving her crazy and she is acting the way she was because of stress, and that everything would be okay when I got to Europe because she would have no stress. She said she needed to be able to touch someone to feel close to them.
When I got to Europe she would pick fights with me over minor things, not want me to touch her cause she had a cough, and when I tried accused me of just wanting sex. We broke it off after a few days and I went home.
Maybe we shouldn't have talked everyday. Maybe I acted needy by voicing my worries over the relationship like I did.
But I feel going Long Distance after a month and a half romance is very hard on anyone.
What could I have done to stop her from losing attraction?
I dated this girl for a month in a half in the summer, it was very intense, both of us felt strongly for each other, or so it seemed. Sadly she had to go to back to school in Europe in early October.
When she first got over there we talked everyday and we had great convos. I missed her but I was happy. I booked a plane ticket to see her for a month over Christmas and New Years.
After a few weeks it was like someone flipped a switch on her. She changed overnight it seemed. She would pick arguments with me over minor bullshit, telling me I shouldn't come *just* to see her, and I should come to see Europe. She seemed to have less and less interest in the relationship and she showed less affection. We stopped talking everyday. Her school schedule took up a lot of her time and I understood that, but whenever we did talk all she would do is complain, or we would fight, and she would show no affection at all ( unless she was drinking it seemed). She would spend all day watching TV all day then when I was ready to chat she said she had homework and was busy now. While I would try to schedule my day so I would have time to talk to her.
I tried to talk about the issues but she always pushed it off and said she didn’t want to talk right then. I felt quite upset about this because here I am making such a big investment and sacrifice to go over there and spend Christmas with her.
This caused me to act needy and tell her that I felt things weren't going good and I couldn't go on in a relationship like that. I felt things weren’t going well so I felt I had to bring it up. But maybe it drove her further away. I asked her if things were okay and told her I was worrying 3 – 4 times over a month.
She would tell me that I bring that up all the time and I'm driving her crazy and she is acting the way she was because of stress, and that everything would be okay when I got to Europe because she would have no stress. She said she needed to be able to touch someone to feel close to them.
When I got to Europe she would pick fights with me over minor things, not want me to touch her cause she had a cough, and when I tried accused me of just wanting sex. We broke it off after a few days and I went home.
Maybe we shouldn't have talked everyday. Maybe I acted needy by voicing my worries over the relationship like I did.
But I feel going Long Distance after a month and a half romance is very hard on anyone.
What could I have done to stop her from losing attraction?
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