Money issues

[lucybelle]

As some of you might have read my other post, the other day I had to buy my SO's plane ticket to the USA because the website needed a card attached to an American address. He told me he'd pay me back and I said "esta bien" like "that's okay". Meaning yes.. he can pay me back later.

Well now I'm worried he thought I meant "that's okay, you don't have to pay me back". Obviously he can't pay me back until he actually gets here, but I don't really know how to bring it up. I was going to pay for a part of the ticket, but I want him to pay for most of it! I have the money to cover it, but so does he. And I'm just not ready to be sharing expenses like that yet. While he's living with me, I'm going to continue paying full rent, so that ticket money will probably need to go to that.

Any advice on how to bring it up??

[Silviar]

If you want to be together forever, you're going to have to learn that talking about money is a normal part of every relationship. Now's your chance to start. Let him get there, get settled in, and you might be surprised to find he brings it up first. If he doesn't, then after a few days say "Hey, can we get the money for the ticket sorted? I want to put it towards rent while you're here."

Don't treat it like it's a big deal, and your nerves won't explode it into a big deal. Make sense? Money is only as nerve wracking as you allow it to be, and it's part of everyday life, the same way that cleaning and eating are.

[Karringtyn]

Silv said it best...

Money issues are a part of every day life..I would bring it up just as she suggested!

[nicole]

agreed with above ^^ just bring it up, maybe ask before hand, "will you have that money ready for me, I need it for...." just to make sure he has it and wasn't thinking that you said you'd covered it.

I'm still pretty awkward when it comes to talking money, I don't even know how much he earns in a year, but we're getting better. I got him to transfer all his vacation spending money into one of my debit accounts so he didn't have to pay commission when he wanted money out of the ATM, or carry a huge some of it around with him. At the end of the visit he reminded me to send the money he hadn't spent back to his account, which I did once he'd left. It wasn't that awkward at all- I suppose once you start talking about things like that, it becomes easier, you just have to get the ball rolling first.