Lately I have been questioning my LDR. I'm sure this is common, however, my situation is a little more unique than most. We started out together, we've lived together, the whole bit. We found out we were having a baby and I became really sick. This forced us into our current LDR since Nov 2009. The plan has always been to get married and now to close the gap. But during the whole two and a half years we were together he never popped the question. Now, the baby is 7 months and the closer he gets to his first birthday the more the reality of our LDR hits me. I never wanted to be a single parent and even though we are still together, single is how I feel. I have a son and I wonder with each milestone (especially male ones) will he be there? I want to have hope and I pray for strength. But the reality is, he's had plenty of chances to get married and make the commitment and be closer to us, but I still find there are some things that take priority in his life. >>>Segue>>> I ran into an old boyfriend from over a decade ago. I don't remember all the details but the things I do remember is the connection we had, how innocent we were and how positive he was in my life at a time when I felt the most negative. We've talked on the phone the past few nights and I am amazed how our connection is genuinely still there. He knows all about my situation, not all the details, but that I am in an LDR and about my son. He's respectful of me and my relationship and we have kept things as neutral as possible. >>>Segue>>> Until last night I didn't think I knew the meaning of emotionally cheating and I can see how this ex can fully help me realize the definition. Honestly, it's nothing either one of us are doing intentionally, it's just the connection we share is so strong and is very different from my SO. Mentally, my ex and I are stronger than my SO and I forgot how important that is to me. I've had my questions about my LDR even before my ex and I reconnected. I never thought I could love anyone the way I love my SO. But now I guess seeing that someone else can be interesting to me adds a whole new dynamic to the dilemma. Please share any thoughts, feelings, and/or advice you may have.
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excuse me if i sound harsh, but i believe that when u start questioning your self about situations like that, especially involving an ex, is because the relationship is in a bad or fragile situation. my advise would be for u to let ur SO know how u feeling n to find the ways to solve the situation asap in order to avoiding further complications or getting hurt. -
Not harsh at all, I want honesty. We've talked and talked and talked. He makes promises and I fear he just won't follow through. It's been almost a year and a half and I guess I'm just getting tired of waiting.Comment
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look theres a saying that my SO tells me alot and is so true it might help u to take a final decision “If you wait until you feel it's the right time to do it, you'll probably never do much of anything.”Comment
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That is an awesome saying, I have already emailed it to him. No explanation, just those words. I often catch him saying things like, later will be the right time or if I could just do this first. Sometimes I feel he stands in his own way. I try to give my opinion without sounding like a nag and sometimes I nag. But in the end he makes his own decisions. Thank you for those words, they really spoke to me.Comment
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Ur more than welcome, keep in touch n good luck!Comment
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