So I need some advice here. I know I'm not dating my SO's mom, but I'm going out of my mind about her sometimes.. my SO and I are from very different backgrounds, and his childhood has definitely been a lot stricter than mine. His mom is a single mother, so I understand that she has been doing the best she could for her kids while they were growing up. However, my SO and I are both 28 years old now, and she treats us like kids. Especially my bf. She still tries to control him and many times succeeds. I feel like she puts him down a lot too and is sometimes straight out mentally abusive to him. He hasn't been that successful in his life, even though he's the only one of them (his mom and sis) who has a college degree. Yet he still works crappy jobs and makes no money. He already feels like a loser, but his mother isn't helping at all. She's a very loud and intimidating person, and I've never stood up to her really, and I have a hard time imagining doing that too, plus I guess it's not really my place to say anything. Anyway, when my SO and I are at her house, we're not allowed upstairs in his room together, not even with the door open. We're also not allowed to sleep in the same bed or even show too much affection, like a small peck is a huge no-no or sitting too close together on the couch or holding hands is also a problem for her sometimes. I'm really going out of my mind about this. I feel like we're both being treated like babies, but at the same time I know it's her house, and I don't want to disrespect her. Doesn't change the fact that it's getting more and more ridiculous with more and more little rules being decided on.
I feel like she has a problem with our relationship in general. I don't know if it's me that she doesn't like, or maybe she likes me, but she might not think I'm right for her son (I'm white and he's black) or there could be other reasons. Either way, I'm trying to distance myself from her, but she's such a dominant part of my SO's life still, so that's really hard to do.
My SO and I decided to get a hotel for the week the next time I'm visiting. He told his mom about it, and she went on and on about how we're only doing that because we want to have sex, and we can't at her house. That's absolutely ridiculous. But it's gotten to the point where we can't really be alone or spend any time together just the two of us if we're at her house. And even if it were just for sex, that's none of her freaking business!
Anyway, I don't really know how to deal with this.. it's just getting worse, and I feel more and more annoyed and affected by this.. am I just overreacting?
Sorry, hope this all made sense.. any advice or thoughts would be great!
I feel like she has a problem with our relationship in general. I don't know if it's me that she doesn't like, or maybe she likes me, but she might not think I'm right for her son (I'm white and he's black) or there could be other reasons. Either way, I'm trying to distance myself from her, but she's such a dominant part of my SO's life still, so that's really hard to do.
My SO and I decided to get a hotel for the week the next time I'm visiting. He told his mom about it, and she went on and on about how we're only doing that because we want to have sex, and we can't at her house. That's absolutely ridiculous. But it's gotten to the point where we can't really be alone or spend any time together just the two of us if we're at her house. And even if it were just for sex, that's none of her freaking business!
Anyway, I don't really know how to deal with this.. it's just getting worse, and I feel more and more annoyed and affected by this.. am I just overreacting?
Sorry, hope this all made sense.. any advice or thoughts would be great!
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