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Broke up for the 3rd time

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    #1

    Broke up for the 3rd time

    Hey everyone!!!

    Well I need some support...

    Well I have been in LDR for a year and a half with a guy from Switzerland. We have seen each other twice. I went to see him Twice, once in Australia and another time in Switzerland. The distance has been difficult this round, and he has broken up with me, today, for the third time siting that we are not on the same page and that he is sad all the time. I tried to reason with him, but he feels that it is best. One of his concerns are about me living for someone else and not myself. I told him that of course I am living for myself. It's has been so frustrating because I thought we were committed to this, and I thought that we would push through this difficult time. I am sad and in disbelief and I wish someone could give me some advice about how to move on and still have the things that I want. I really wanted him to be in my life and now he just ripped my heart out!
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    #2
    i'm not that great at advice..but i was in a similarish situation a few years ago.
    it's gonna hurt for a while but the pain will get better. and it will work out for the best. i know it sounds lame but it's the truth. you need someone that is on the same page as you, maybe later on down the road it will work out. but just keep space. take time for yourself to get over him..
    believe me it's not easy but it's the best thing and only thing you can really do..

    best wishes

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      #3
      Its not worth being with someone who plays with your heart like that, multiple break-ups should tell you that maybe its better to stay that way, I'm sorry. Obviously he is having a lot of trouble being in an LDR, and they aren't for everybody, some people just can't do it. This will hurt for a while, but its better than letting this go on over and over again. Good luck.
      Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein

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        #4
        You have to decide how much you can take. PUT YOURSELF and YOUR HEART first. It will hurt for awhile...BUT in the long run, you deserve stability and constance in your life..
        NY to Texas Married on...August 17th, 2013

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          #5
          What Karringtyn said.

          *HUGS* for you, though. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.
          LFAD Book Challenge: 4/25 Complete
          Currently Reading: Les Miserables, by Victor Hugo (219/1463 pages read)
          Total Pages Read This Year: 3283

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            #6
            You guys I just wonder if there is some way to change his mind. I understand that the distance is difficult but we have made two trips happen! We stuck with it for this long, why can't we go the distance. I just feel so sad and frustrated. I don't want to put this behind me. I want so badly to fight for this. I want there to be a chance to have all the things I want in my life. We have been in this relationship for over 18 months, I do not see why we can't get creative about the future. There is the whole idea about living for myself, and sure I do live for myself, but love is what keeps me going. I use to believe that love conquered all. He is really somebody I could be with. I want him back. I want him to reconsider. I want to have it all. Is that unrealistic. Is there such a thing as the impossible? He said that I created all of these doubts inside of his head. We had a very crazy conversation on Sunday because I had always thought about closing the distance, and starting another life with him. Is there anyway to win him back? rrggghh...pointless. I think it is really over this time. It just doesn't seem fair. He was suppose to come see me here and then make a decision. I feel like hating for hurting like this again. I am so scared of what the future holds now. I don't want to be single. I chose this for myself because it has value to me, whats wrong with fighting for something you believe in? Thanks for the advice guys. I am trying to stay positive. Any comments?

            Comment

              #7
              I'm sorry. You can't coerce someone into a functional relationship. It does stink that he's basically saying that he's breaking up with you for your own good (I hate when adults try to parent other adults like that), but if he's trying to say that you're too clingy, the worst thing you can do is try to persuade him back into the relationship. I suggest giving yourself some time to grieve, then start focusing on the good things about being single-- they do exist, and if you can show the next guy that you're perfectly happy being single then you have a better chance at a successful relationship.

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