How to Be the Perfect Girlfriend?

[Mfashnik]

Really. I want to know.

Guys: What do you want from your girlfriends? what kind of stuff drives you nuts? What kinds of things do you love?

Girls: What do you do to achieve this?

Ready Go!

[snow_girl]

I don't think anyone is perfect. But to be a great girlfriend would mean being understanding, caring and open and willing to compromise.

He likes me for who I am and I am not going to go out of my way to live up to standards of being perfect. If he doesn't think I am the best then maybe we are not the right match and I'd go find someone who does think so.

[Dziubka]

To me there's no such thing as "the perfect boy-/girlfriend".
Quite possibly things that my SO absolutely loves about me, are other people's pet peeves. There are probably some universal things, but they're common sense. Like not beating him or not cheating are things that most likely no one wants their girlfriend to do....

Your SO is with you and not with someone else, so you're the closest to perfect that there is for him.

[folclor]

I'm never going to be perfect so I'm me instead ^^

[Thad]

My SO and I are far from perfect. I think "perfect" just means that you're right for each other, and more importantly I think it means that you grow together as a couple. By that I do mean become closer, but I also mean the you learn how to deal with life together. That is something that is totally different from dealing with life as a single.

[LadyEcstsasy]

lol I've asked my SO before what the "perfect girlfriend" would be like and he can only just shrug at me and say he has no idea. He's tried calling me perfect but we both know that's not true. I have flaws, many of them lol and sometimes they're very hard for either of us to ignore.

We have a certain kind of relationship where he has the final say on a lot of matters (whether he exercises that right or not). What I do to achieve being the best girl there is for him - notice I didn't say 'perfect' - is mostly just being supportive of him, loving him, compromising. If he didn't think I was the best girl for him, then he'd be welcome to go find someone else.

[Cucaratcha]

Kind of difficult to say, because everyone likes different things.
For example me, I'd like my girlfriend to send me thousand of texts, calling me a lot and all that stuff... she's not like that, she's, I'd say, normal The thing is I love to get attention from her, the more I get, the best I feel.

But I know some other guys would think it's too much and that they can't breath, so, you have to evaluate it yourself

[amandamayaaa]

yeah like everyone has said, you just can't be perfect, thats not how we were made. mistakes are good, if they're not too serious atleast. mistakes are what makes us learn and grow as an individual. sometimes i tell eric i wish i could be perfect, and he always says the same thing.. "you're not perfect, but you're perfect for me" and that right there just makes me feel special to him in a way that i can't describe.

and like cucaratcha said.. it all depends on how each person is. our relationship is the same way, we text and keep in contact with each other 24/7 all day long.. thats just how we are. and like he said some people would think that is suffocating, but thats what we like as a couple. everyone is different, and we are all going to make mistakes.. believe me i've made my share of them.. but we just have to learn to get back up on our feet and learn from them. i annoy the hell out of eric.. a lot of times on purpose he does the same to me! but that doesn't mean that he is going to leave me because i'm not "perfect" thats what unconditional love is.. even if he's pissing me off i still love him and want everything to do with him, and same with him

just find the balance!

[Rugger]

I agree that it depends on the person. I try and be the best girlfriend I can be for him, which means I will listen when he needs to be listen to and I will be quiet when he needs that. We are perfect for each other, because our flaws don't drive the other crazy....yet

[Lighthouse]

You have to realise that it's not always going to be sunshine and rainbows, like everyone's said, however, it can be MOST of the time with simple practice and lots of communication.

My lass and me have had our share of stupid fights, but we've always pulled through, because neither of us are too proud to admit when we're wrong, when it comes to situations. I know it's hard for blokes to swallow their pride, but she's worth it, if you love her.

Talk about problems, when they arise, not afterwards, that's so vital in any relationship.

But, what I like from my girl... Well, she's caring, she listens, she's helpful (I forget shit, a lot! She's like a secretary sometimes. <3) we can talk for hours about nothing at all, she's realistic, she's supportive and she doesn't take any crap from me!

Not only do we do the serious long term planning stuff together, but we also play together (define play and "play" ) it's just the best thing to have someone who's on the same level as you, in regards to stuff like videogames and tabletop RPGs.
An element of fun is good for any relationship...
I don't want to go into my SO's personal flaws publicly, but I'm learning to accept them and work with her to overcome them.

"Love will find a way."

[Zephii]

"Perfect" is pretty well unatainable, but that doesn't stop us trying. Obi tells me frequently that I'm the perfect gf (and embarrasingly tells other people this too) so, I'm going to have a crack at answering this one. Because it'll be funny!

* I remember to put him first - I figure if both people in a relationship put each other first then you're got a pretty good chance of things being balanced.
* Treat him/her how you would like to be treated. - Granted, this doesn't work for everyone. It works for us because we have similar personalities. I expect 100% honesty, even if the knowledge will hurt me, for example, so I'm 100% honest with Obi. If he's home before I am, I like dinner to be on the table when I get in, so I make sure if I'm first home dinner is on the table when he gets in.
* Give 50% more than you wish to recieve. - This one is hard. Sometimes I fail at this. But the idea is just to go that extra mile. If you're going to do something, do it right, you know? In practical terms this means I do %50 more housework (when our hours are even.) or I give more during frisky times, or whatever.
* Speak up. - If theres something wrong say something. Deal with it as soon as possible. Don't let it fester.
* Ask questions. - Not everyone has the gift of the gab. Something might be bothering him/her, or s/he might long for something and not know how to open the conversation. I try to remember to check in with Obi once in a while. I'll ask "How are you on the inside?", "Are you happy?" and "Is there anything I can do for you?"
* Know their expectations. - Luckily for me, Obi doesn't expect much. But still it's good to know what they expect in a relationship and of your gender roles. This stuff needs to be discussed. For example, I expect a fair division of household labour. I expect if we are working similar hours we do similar amounts around the house (with me doing the bigger half because I'm the chick). He expects me to work. Regardless of what I do around the house, he wants me to contribute financially until we have children.
* Think about how s/he might feel. Put yourself in the other person's shoes. Use your common sence.
* Realise that there is a possibility the relationship means more to you than it does to them. I'm not saying they care about you less, but there is usually one person who is more needy than the other. For us, it's my responsibility to look after the relationship. We consider it my "career" in a way. I care more and I'm the person willing to put in the extra effort that keeps things special. It's my job to come up with the fun ideas, my job to realise we need to check in with each other talk and update our goals.
* Find a balance. - There's a fine line to walk... you don't want to be clingy and needy, nor do you want to be detached and cold. You don't want to spend too much or too little time with each other. You don't want to have nothing in common, but you need things that are uniquely you.
* Be intimate. - Seriously. You're not always going to be in the mood at the same time, but you know what? Rejection hurts. Don't reject him unless you have a good reason to do so. "I don't feel like it," and "I'm not in the mood" are not good reasons.

That's all I got lol

[Sarah M]

Don't strive for perfection, strive to be the best you can be. Make him feel as special as he deserves. Make sure you respect yourself and your partner and treat each other in such a way that shows it.
Everyone has their flaws, but your individual perception can change them from negative to positive.