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    #16
    Originally posted by Silviar View Post
    It does make more sense, yes, but you know, you're going to be living together while traveling for, if I recall correctly, about a year. This year is going to give you a lot of insight about each other, and the time necessary to start ironing out those plans. I would think about what you would like, individually or as a couple, after the trip, and give yourself some time to really consider what's important to you. Then you can start discussing it as the trip goes on. Really, with an international relationship, I found that being flexible on who goes where is what helped us out - and the natural outcome of where we should end up came out naturally as our relationship and life progressed. My SO graduated, but job opportunities were shit here in the US and great where he's at, so he came back to Australia, got a good job, and now I'm headed over to do the same while we live together.

    Do we have all of our plans for being permanently together ironed out? No. But I'm ok with that - I know I'm going to be with him.

    I think, given where you're at, and you've mentioned his hesitancy to make plans, that this will help you evolve that talk so you know that 1) you both want to do the same thing and 2) how you're gonna do it. Give it some time. I don't blame him for wanting to focus on the trip - it's a big deal and a lot of money for both of you. when you're on the trip, you'll have all the time in the world to sort the future out.
    Flexibility is something I have to work on. He says we will eventually talk about it when neither of us have any prejudice against any country, because right now there are places I would like to go, but he doesn't like and vice versa. The trip planning has slowed down recently, mostly due to my heavy workload and other distractions, I'm sure he would appreciate if I start researching more on that, heh. There are other things about after the trip, like, he wants us to be married before we move in together, that needs to be taken into consideration when we do start to slowly think things through. Thanks for the advice, it means a lot. (:

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      #17
      Originally posted by amit2k11 View Post
      Ill agree with most of the comments made here. Once you are confident and more so once you see that the relationship is definitely at a point where such serious matters need to be discussed you should go ahead and discuss this. Right now Ill agree with your SO that the trip needs to be planned and you guys should enjoy it to the utmost. This experience you guys should always cherish.
      Best of luck and stay happy.
      I saw the importance of the trip, but at that moment I was under the impression that planning for after was equally important, but I suppose it's really not, not as this point in time. I'm the more impulsive one of the two of us, and also the one with the mind that only thinks about one thing at a time. I need to learn to prioritize! Thankyou! (:

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