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    She decided to break up...

    You may have seen my topic about my jealousy issue...
    Yesterday she left me without answering my messages, nothing.

    Then in the night when I called her she told me it would be healthier for both of us if we break up. She said she still loves me but my jealousy "problem" was too much for her, including distance and past argues we had. I told her all I had in my heart, that I understood I acted like a child and that I can be better in that way, I could work on it to stop being like that...

    She said word for word

    "really i wont change my mind
    i love u
    but i need for me to alone
    is healthier for us!"

    "it doesnt matter if u did it or not as i wont change what i said so stop!"

    "Is better like this, so please dont blame me and stop making me feel guilty"

    "i wont give u fake hope!"

    She changed her Facebook relationship status like 15 minutes after that, she changed her password (she gave it to me once), Facebook, gmail, hotmail...

    I've sent her flowers with a word "Give us a chance, I love you". She'll receive it today...
    If she really still loves me, is there any chance ?
    Although I wonder if she said that to make it softer for me...

    But, I think she won't change her mind
    If you have any advice to try to fix the things...
    Everything is dark

    #2
    well first off dont keep contacting her you do that its not gonna help things at all give her some space for a week then maybe bring it up to her again, but im sorry she did that maybe a little break would help and do ya some good!

    Comment


      #3
      If she asked you to give her space, you need to respect that. You've been posting for a long time about your jealousy issues, and it sounds like they've worn her out. I can't blame her. Until those are resolved, you're not going to have a chance with her - that or any chance she gives will end up repeating the same pattern.

      Spend some time working on yourself and YOUR issues, and a healthy relationship will follow. I can't say it will be with her, but at that point, anything is possible. Good luck.


      LFAD Book Challenge: 34/100 Complete

      Comment


        #4
        She didnt ask me to give her space... I mean, yes, 1 month ago, and I did so.
        I sent her less messages, and it was better for her.
        Just 2 days ago I was jealous about her being in the house of a guy I dont know anything about until late...
        I regret because she was just there to study, I told her I regretted, she said it was too much.
        I'm crazy of her, I have her in my blood, I'm ready to make all the efforts I need to be with her... but it looks like she is done with that.
        I don't know what should I do

        Comment


          #5
          Don't do anything. Give yourself some time to try, be sad, and let it out of your system. Give yourself some time to be. Allow yourself to not rush into anything in any direction. Once you've had a chance to settle down from the turmoil, then you'll know what you need to do.


          LFAD Book Challenge: 34/100 Complete

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            #6
            I'm sorry to hear this. A long distance relationship must be so hard when jealousy is involved.

            Comment


              #7
              Oh Man !! This is really Sad. See man if you really love her and want her back don't react at this very moment. Keep yourself off from her as much as you can. The more you try to be in touch with her the more she will run away from you,this is inherent of we human beings. Moreover, even if at this moment you discuss this issue it will lead to a nasty fight and that will make things worse. So, if you really want the things not to get worse then Please shut yourself out from this for the moment and concentrate on other things right now. Also, don't be alone at this moment.Meet up with your friends,hang out and just don't leave a moment for yourself to be lonely.

              Idea is to let go her for the time being and make yourself a better man. Idea is even if you loose your heart, you don't loose your dignity and self worth.

              We all are with you and please keep us updating and whatever you feel at this moment.

              Comment


                #8
                I've written an email and I'm waiting that she's back home to send it to her.
                In this email I basically tell her all the good moments we've had together. I apologize for the way I acted, I tell her how much I love her and I ask her to give me another chance...
                It's not what you guys told me to do, but I don't know, I feel like I have to do that
                I'm even hesitating to link her the forum to show her I'm trying everything to be better...

                I'm completely lost

                Comment


                  #9
                  Don't do it.Don't even send the mail to her.It will make you appear desperate and needy at this moment which is exactly she is expecting from you.That will push her further away from you.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    But how could I make the things better just being silent ?

                    Comment


                      #11
                      shes gonna block you completely if you dont give her some space and stop talking to her for a bit, let things alone for a week or so and then try and contact her but your gonna push her away farther if you keep this up

                      Comment


                        #12
                        First thing first, when you know she already loves you. You don't need to go and prove it to her by sending mail or a link like this. She already knows what you are going through at this moment,trust me if she loves you truly she must be also feeling the same pain as you are.

                        Secondly, by agreeing to her decision to have a break up you are showing that you respect her opinion.Not only that you are emotionally so stable that you are quite easily moving on too.This you can do by not contacting her and instead letting her make a rethink on this.

                        Thirdly, she already knows you will come back to her by sending mails,a card, a gift or even this link. Do you really want to do what she is expecting from you ?

                        The whole point is that the more you try to convince her at this moment, the more she will push you or even hurt you hard. Let her rethink over this completely and yes if she comes back to you as a friend first and then as an SO you know for sure this LOVE will stay forever.

                        It takes lot of courage to do exactly the opposite of what people expect from you at such moment. That defines your character,man.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          She already knows how you feel. Honestly you have backed her into a corner. I HAVE been there. It is mentally exhausting and eventually you just want to breathe!!!! You can't keep trying to prove yourself over and over to someone....so it's better to just be free. The love NEEDS to be enough, there has to be trust in there. You can tell her all you want that you will change, that you have learned your lesson, but in all reality by continuing to contact her and bug her....you are STILL hounding her....

                          I agree...you will be blocked...that would be what I would do. You can love someone entirely and NOT want to be with them. Because ultimately...it comes down to taking care of one's self first! She has realized that she can't do this...respect this for now.
                          NY to Texas Married on...August 17th, 2013

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Oh man, I'm so so sorry Cucaratcha. I know exactly what you're going through..
                            I agree completely with Amit here. And the others for that matter. You have to stop contacting her. It does make you look desperate and clingy and it weakens your chances of getting back together with her at some point. She might even block you entirely, like someone else on here said. Seriously.. you already sent her flowers, she knows you still love her, and the email is the worst idea you could do. Don't send it. Don't contact her and don't link to this forum (that would actually be the worst idea ever!). I know that you want to try everything and that you're right now feeling obsessed to get back with her. But being like this makes everything worse, trust me. You HAVE to endure this, it's a phase that you need to go through right now. The best thing you can do is try to keep yourself busy with other things that make you happy, cry when you need to, talk to people as much as you can about this, use this forum as much as you want, turn your phone off, go for a long walk or run.. whatever you can think of. You have to do this, you have to get through this and show her that you have a life too and can be happy without her. Then, maybe, there's a chance for you two later...
                            I wish you the best of luck, my heart goes out to you

                            Comment


                              #15
                              She received my flowers

                              She texted me "I received the flowers, thank u!"

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