finally learning how to not sweat the small stuff

[amandamayaaa]

Hey guys, it's been a little while since i've been on here
eric came here for valentines day weekend.. and we had an amazzzing time together
i won't be seeing him now until may, which sucks but hey we'll find a way, we always do!

anyways.. the past few months i've had a huuge problem of overthinking every little thing, and making huge ordeals out of nothing. some i had actual reasons, but most i admit were just downright stupid. so eric and i got into a huge fight a little less than a week ago, and for the first time he told me he had just about had it, and it was the closest he had ever been to being done.

it scared the hell out of me, thinking i was that close to losing someone i loved so much. so it really made me open my eyes, and realize what a monster i had become. i was NOTHING like the real me, and no matter how many times i told him that, it still didn't make up for the way i was acting. i was disgusted in myself. i've never been the nagging, jealous girlfriend.. i'm always miss positive and have a really bubbly personality.. and here i was, nagging and nit picking at every little thing he was doing. i wouldn't want him to be like that, so why would i do that to him

anyways.. i've been so different the past few days, and i can't even begin to explain how much happier i have been. and the little things that i used to let really get to me, are now genuinely not even bothering me! it's such a relieving feeling

i can't really explain what i'm doing differently, but i'm just letting go of that monster that was in me, and bringing back the person he first fell in love with

it's such a relieving feeling, and i didn't realize how much i was bringing myself down, just for nagging at everything

i've been in great spirits ever since

[Jrapp]

I'm glad you're turning things in the right direction and being engulfed in happiness!(:

[amandamayaaa]

thank you! it's a great feeling, i hate seeing the person i became, but it's not too late to turn around and be the person i know i'm mean to be

hey i see your from michigan, thats where my SO lives!

[Jrapp]

I know what you mean, I used to be kind of jealous. I still get that way from time to time, but I do NOT let it hinder our relationship. I don't want to hurt it even a little.

Yeah I am! I noticed that he lived here when I posted!! I live in southern Michigan, pretty close to the Ohio border =p

[Karringtyn]

Wow. I had almost the same exact thing happen to me last week...it was our last day of our visit.

It was eye opening! Great to hear from yoU!

[amandamayaaa]

I know what you mean, I used to be kind of jealous. I still get that way from time to time, but I do NOT let it hinder our relationship. I don't want to hurt it even a little.

Yeah I am! I noticed that he lived here when I posted!! I live in southern Michigan, pretty close to the Ohio border =p

haha ohhh nice, yeah my SO lives in northern michigan!

and karringtyn.. it's great to be back and hear from you too!
it was very eye opening, and it made me just stop and think for a second, and thats what it really took to make me realize i had to get my act together

[sabby64]

I don't get jealous, but I do get really depressing sometimes, and it really bothers Brandon because he doesn't know what to do with it. I'm trying to save all the depressing talk now for my blog and my mom and make sure that I don't drive him away with neediness and clinginess, because I lost my last boyfriend (partly) because of that and I don't want to ever have to go through that again.

It's really hard...

[TknandLvnIt]

I don't get jealous, but I do get really depressing sometimes, and it really bothers Brandon because he doesn't know what to do with it. I'm trying to save all the depressing talk now for my blog and my mom and make sure that I don't drive him away with neediness and clinginess, because I lost my last boyfriend (partly) because of that and I don't want to ever have to go through that again.

It's really hard...

It is hard and sometimes women can be really emotional creatures...but you should be able to talk to him about anything. One thing that has helped with us is that I inform him when I'm feeling a bit overly emotional or I preface what I say that I know how its going to sound and that its going to make me seem clingy and emotional but in that moment I need him to reassure me about us or me. He has those moments too so its a give and take :-)

[TknandLvnIt]

My first bf broke up with me for similar reasons but the problem is he never talked to me about it just got fed up. I worry about the same thing with my SO and he can tell and he reassures me that I will never be too much or that he will not wanna deal with me but that doesn't mean I don't frustrate him. I don't think your SO was trying to be hurtful but I think sometimes you have to be harsh to recognize what you are doing. It hurts in the moment but I always know its out of love when he says he is tired of something.

[fiestydyste]

amanda... I am the EXACT same way... my SO and I have had quite a few fights about little things that shouldn't even matter really... I think it's mostly when I'm PMSing when it happens... but also because with his schedule and my schedule we don't get to talk that often... I almost text him every day when I've got the "depression" bug... and he doesn't always answer my text.. actually I was going to start a blog cause I'm kind of at a lost on how to fill my time up between those moments so I don't become clingy and texting him all the time...

I have told him.. I just need a "Hello" or "thinking about you.. have a great day" and I would be fine... but guess guys don't think like we do... he says he's sorry all the time for not texting or emailing me as often and that "things are busy" ... and then of course when we talk on the phone... I'm in love with him all over again and don't even think about the things I should be saying... Ok.. so now I'm getting off your topic here...

But I understand.. and learning not to do the things that we do is sometimes hard... just glad you've found the medium.. just give me some pointers if you have any!

[NaNi]

What a lovely post.

My SO and I had all kind of fights lately and it's just not worth it because we love each other so much.

I really want to try to not get worked up over small stuff. Not as much anyway.

[Subu85]

OP I'm really happy for you~ I think I'm experiencing something similar or I'm at the very beginning of it. I would always nag him about the level of our communication but I'm slowly letting go and not allowing certain things to bother me. I'm trying to keep myself busy so I'm distracted from thinking anything negative. I don't like how I became either and after I looked at myself I realised how much I had changed. That's not who I am and I'm slowly working back to becoming the old me again.

[jjbabixo]

I am so thankful I saw this thread!!!