The only snag...

[totalspiffage]

OK, so I love my boyfriend. My friends love him, we've met in person, we have a plan for the future, he's devoted, etc...

But.

He's muslim and I'm... not. haha. We've talked about religion. Nothing is off limits with us. But, I'm worried about them accepting me. Granted, they won't be meeting me for about two years, but still. They've specifically told him to marry a muslim girl. He doesn't care, so he says, but I know his family is really important to him, and I couldn't split them apart like that.

He knows I'd do anything to support him and his religion, but I can only hope his parents see that too. They're very traditional, from what I've heard about them.

Have any of you encountered a problem like this?

[Kitty]

I can honestly say no I haven't...at least not yet. Hope you guys can work things out wih religion and family. *hugs* I'm sure you'll find good advice somewhere from someone here.

[Zapookie]

I guess the only hope is that when his parents meet you, they'll see you for the person you are and not what religion you abide by. Sometimes different religions amongst couples can be a hindrance but if you two have a love that surpasses that, you'll meet on the same page and have that mutual understanding. Good luck x

[Rach321]

I have... I dated a guy who was Hindu in college. But the entire time we were together, he still had feelings for his ex, who was also Hindu. We were never "officially" together because he always wanted to see her again to see if he still loved her (sort of complicated...) but we were in love. He always said that he wouldn't choose her over me because she was Hindu, but in the end they got married. It was really upsetting for me, because I do feel like the fact that his parents' approval of her did factor into his decision. It's okay- because I'd never have gotten together with my wonderful boyfriend if we had stayed together. And I truly believe that my current boyfriend is "the one"

But... your situation sounds different! I don't think my ex ever really felt that he wanted to spend his life with me. But your SO sounds like he does. In that case, you may find that it will take a bit of negotiating (like, what kind of service you might have when you marry, if you have kids, what religion will you teach them, etc.) None of these are relationship-breakers if you truly love each other and are committed to working it out!

[totalspiffage]

But... your situation sounds different! I don't think my ex ever really felt that he wanted to spend his life with me. But your SO sounds like he does. In that case, you may find that it will take a bit of negotiating (like, what kind of service you might have when you marry, if you have kids, what religion will you teach them, etc.) None of these are relationship-breakers if you truly love each other and are committed to working it out!

Well, I'm sorry you had to go through all that, that must have been heartbreaking.

But yes, he's amazing about supporting me, and I've already shown my support for him. He's really just incredible and really devoted to being with me quite seriously. I've told him that I don't want to convert because that would break my grandmother's heart, and he understands. So hopefully we can just explain things and maybe things will just work out.

[OneForTheRomance]

This situation is very complicated. You can not break with your faith in fear of hurting your grandmother, and it will be hard for him to do the same in fear of disappointing his family. Some where along the line you guys may come to a point where you have to decide what is right for YOU two, not your families. It may be hard for them to except at first, leading to many arguments and awkwardness, but in the end, no matter what you choose to do, they will see that you love each other and that they could truly not want anything else for someone they love so much. I don't envy your situation at all, but I would say that when it comes to things like this it is okay to be a little selfish sometimes and just think of what you want to do.

[William]

The muslim religion is very incompatible with other religions, especially if He is the muslim.

I really don't want to discourage you, but I have heard a lot of bad stories, including two cases with some of my closest friends, whose parents were in a similar situation as you two. Their mother ended up fleeing back to America with her children.

On the other hand of course, you never hear about the stories with a happy end, but I'm sure there's far more out there than the bad ones . It's just a matter of having a very good understanding with each other.

Also: you two should Really watch the film 'Not without my daughter'. Watch it together, then see how you each feel about it. That should really help you to talk about it.
Then later, there was a documentary made called 'Without my daughter', which looks at things from the opposite point of view. I thought they were both Really insightful; must watch, especially for you two!

[Mio]

This is hard because you have different faiths, and it will be heart breaking for the families because of the tradition. I hope you can find a way to make it work!

[totalspiffage]

Well, he's not, I don't want to say he's not serious, but he doesn't like -organized- religion. He's told me his standpoints and an overview of his interpretation of his faith. He's very laid -back and believes that people should read and be logical. He even says that he's actually 'allowed'(not that he'd care otherwise) to marry a christian(which I am only by being raised christian...). He puts religion after me, saying that his god will forgive him anyway. He's not strict at all, and his family really isn't either, it's just that they've asked him to marry within the religion. I know he'd choose me over them, but I wouldn't want to risk it anyway. It's not him I'm worried about, it's his family. We'll rock the boat, but he's confident everything will work out.