Originally posted by tissa
View Post
-
Well, you told Far_Away_So_Close that she was being unusual, so I pointed out that I didn't think she was really so unusual and why. Perfectly permissible in this forum, no? Especially if it gets people to think about something in a way they haven't before.Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert Einstein -
You don't HAVE to pick. Life has been, is and always will be about balance. I have a career, I have a family (my daughter and I). And now that I don't have ex-asshole, I'm happier than ever.Originally posted by tissa View Post
Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.
When we love, it isn't because the person's perfect, it's because we learn to see an imperfect person perfectly.
True love does not worry about the distance between, for the heart and soul travels through one's words
When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, and no one can ever tear them apart.
1 universe, 9 planets, 7 continents, 194 countries, 50 states and 10 provinces...and I had the privilege to meet you.Comment
-
Amen! Thanks BabyGund, that's a much better way of putting itOriginally posted by BabyGund View Post
Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. ~Albert EinsteinComment
-
Hmmm at first a career until you can build up to being at a stable place financially and then focus on having a family to give your attention to afterwords. I believe a balance between the two is quite plausible as some others have said ^-^"taim i ngrá leat mo anam chara <3"
Kitten: -laces fingers together- our souls are one <3
Keith: -blushes and gazes at lovingly- forever and always <3Comment
-
Definitely family over career. Family is so important to me. SO and I actually had this conversation last night. Even though I have worked so hard and although I am still working hard to become a nurse, once I start having babies I want to be able to stay with them as much as possible. SO has to feel the same way, I missed out on father time because both my biological and step-father were workaholics and spent more time working then worrying about me, I refuse to let my SO become a workaholic. I would rather live simple then have to work a ton of hours to have luxuries.Comment
-
You know, men don't generally get asked if they'd rather start a family or have a career-- society assumes both will work out just fine.
When I was working dead-end jobs, I would have said family, hands down. Now that I'm back in school and really enjoying my programming classes, I have to say that I want balance. My mom had both and I see no reason why I should be any different if I don't want to be.Comment
-
I've always always grown up with the mindset that I need a good job, so I can have money in order to support my future family, and I don't think that will change. Once I do have kids, of course I'll stay home and be a stay-at-home mom until they're old enough to go to school and than I'll get another job. I want a good career so I can support my family and help my kids have a great life.Comment
-
^^This. Well-said BabyGund. I strive for the middle ground.Originally posted by BabyGund View PostComment
-
Replace daughter with son and you have my answer as well...Originally posted by BabyGund View Post
I actualy never had any intention of having a child, I was way more focused on my career path - and then I got pregnant. I wouldn't change that. It is a hard balance between the two and sometimes you struggle with which aspect gets more attention but I am raising a happy and healthy child and I'm one of the best employees at my job. You can manage both.Comment
-
-
Ok Let me ask you all this. Say you are 30 and somehow your career still has not reached a point when you are making decent money, or you really still do not have a career. Then what? And you realize that as of right now you can not afford the living you would like your family to have, but at the same time you realize that by the time you may be able to afford to buy a house, to pay off loans etc. you will be almost 40. Then what? Not have a family at all? Or start thinking about it when you are 40? But isn't it a bit too late for having babies?
What would you do in this scenario? Still not have a family or go ahead and have a family but have a very simple life?Comment
-
Are you asking for advice on your particular situation? If so, maybe some more details about where you are at in your career and where you want to be would help. If not, then my answer to this question depends way too much on the specifics to even attempt answeringOriginally posted by tissa View Post
Comment
-
Are you asking for advice on your particular situation? If so, maybe some more details about where you are at in your career and where you want to be would help. If not, then my answer to this question depends way too much on the specifics to even attempt answeringOriginally posted by tissa View Post
Comment
-
I am asking in general (tho my situation fits). Neither me nor my SO are financially stable and I am still working towards my career and it will take another few years at least. At the same time I am already 26 and PhD degree takes time and I am only in my first year. By the time both of us hopefully financially secure, it will be a while. So does it mean we still better focus on career or go ahead and start planning a family? I feel like he is leaning towards the first one and I am definitely leaning towards the second one.Originally posted by mllebamako View PostAre you asking for advice on your particular situation? If so, maybe some more details about where you are at in your career and where you want to be would help. If not, then my answer to this question depends way too much on the specifics to even attempt answering
And our situation is very typical for a lot of people. Some people wait till they have everything that in their mind they have to have before having children. Some people do not wait till they have EVERYTHING coz it simply may never happen. Some believe that it is not fair to bring children to the World if you can not give them everything you want to give them, some people believe otherwise.
I grew up in a poor family. I am now getting a PhD. I turned out a decent person. So did my SO who grew up in a poor family too. I know I do not want to wait till the day I have EVERYTHING I would (of course) want to give my children. I am not that young already and I am not getting younger.
But I wnated to see how many people here think like I do and how many do not and whyComment
-
I am asking in generalOriginally posted by mllebamako View PostAre you asking for advice on your particular situation? If so, maybe some more details about where you are at in your career and where you want to be would help. If not, then my answer to this question depends way too much on the specifics to even attempt answeringComment
Comment