Why? This time being apart is really killing me. Nothing I try can get my mind off of him and I'm just aching with sadness of separation. I keep questioning if this is worth the pain, but who's to say ending would be easier? :/
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~"Happiness is not the absence of problems but the ability to deal with them"~ -
I always wonder someone's logic to end a relationship because "it hurts when I miss them." So not only do you end up missing them, but you're lonely now too. Frankly to me that just doubles the pain unnecessarily.
Everyone goes through periods where it's like a knife in our lungs we miss them so much. To me I've actually found it gets worse after you know what you're actually missing, but as my SO put it once "at least with this amount of hurt, I know it's real." -
I seriously considered ending things with my SO when I first moved away. All I could think about was the fact that I was in pain and I wanted the pain to stop, but I realized ending things wouldn't make the pain stop, it would just make it worse. All of us here at LFAD have something wonderful, we have someone that loves us and is willing to stay with us even though we are apart.
The distance is hard, but it really helps me just to focus on visits and the fact that this isn't permanent. Yes, you have to be apart from your SO now, but not for forever. It's okay to be sad, I think we all are, but don't let the emotions overcome you. I cried almost everyday the first few months, but I can honestly say I've been happy the last month or so. I'm still sad because he isn't here with me, but I busy myself with school, exercise, hobbies, friends, family, etc. I find things are a lot easier if you aren't alone and aren't just sitting at home thinking about how much you miss your SO.
*hugs* I hope you feel better soon and remember, this won't last forever.
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Originally posted by Mara View Post
It's funny, I have been really happy lately. My social life is great, I joined a club that I believe has a really great cause, I've been exercising, consisted doing my 365 project, focusing on my schoolwork, and even started writing a (what will be a) novel, just basically "having it all together" and I thought I was really happy. The thing is the more and more I think about it, the more I realize I can't be completely, genuinely happy without him. :/
Thank you for the response!~"Happiness is not the absence of problems but the ability to deal with them"~Comment
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I've been on here a lot too, this is the longest I've been without seeing my boyfriend, and it's really hitting me hard. I'm just trying to stay positive as much as I can, even though some days I'm really depressed all day. But it's worth it, I could never imagine leaving him, we will work through the distance day by day
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That's so true. Leaving doesn't make sense. I wish I could get myself feeling more positive again!~"Happiness is not the absence of problems but the ability to deal with them"~Comment
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I just try to focus on all of the positives and not think about the negatives. Sometimes, I have to talk myself into being happy so to speak. Remind myself of all the good things I have in my life and how good our relationship is and put the one negative (the distance) as far from my mind as possible. Thinking about the distance and/or dwelling about it never seems to do any good, but make me sad!Comment
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I feel exactly the same. It's been so hard for these past few weeks that we almost broke up. I know for a fact that it would just be harder if I end this, but either way it's still hard. I'm just trying to keep my head straight and focus on the things that we have, even if there aren't much. Wish I could make myself more positive too, but it's not easy. D: There are times when I just break down and cry from missing him so bad, but there's nothing I can do.
I'm sorry if I didn't give any advice. I just wanted to get that bit out of my chest. XD"Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue,
a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them
which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky."
- Rainer Maria Rilke
"An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet,
regardless of time, place, or circumstance.
The thread may stretch or tangle, but it will never break."
- an ancient Chinese beliefComment
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That's perfectly okay. I think I made this more as a venting thread! Stupid missing people!~"Happiness is not the absence of problems but the ability to deal with them"~Comment
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