Overreaction?

[Sarah M]

Hi guys,

I've just looked at my boyfriend's Facebook page, as I usually do every so often since he hardly ever uses it except to look at my photos and let friends add him.

But he's got this new friend, and her name is Sonia Hurndon ...I don't think he knows her personally. Seriously, check out her page.

...Should I be worried?

Unfortunately, I've already emailed him asking how he knows her, 'cause she doesn't look like anyone he's mentioned to me before. There's also another girl that he's friends with, from South Africa, but she's four years older than him. He may have gone to school with her, but he wasn't close to anyone that much older.

Should I be worried?

Did I do the right thing?

[karbauer]

I don't have a facebook so I don't know what's on the page. What kind of things are there?

[BJL_Sweetheart1109]

I'd say probably just an initial overreaction. I don't think you have much to worry about unless other things start happening that should cause you to worry. It's just Facebook, he knows you can look at it, and he hardly uses it anyway.....Probably just one of those random people who add whoever they can and somehow came across his page.

[asianbarbie0917]

Ha im a person who adds almost anybody to my page. Maybe ur SO is the same way? but i do think its an over reaction, I have tons of guys on my page and he has tons of girls. he cant control what her profile pic is, Lol if i went through all my friends a good quarter of them are them trying to look "sexy" lol whether or not it works isnt for my judgment. Just remember that its probably harmless. Either way she's not tht attractive (just my opinion)

[agentholli]

I agree, I don't think you need to worry..some people just add people because they want like 400 friends. She looks almost like she is some kind of actress or singer or something, maybe just trying to get herself out there? It isnt an overreaction, you need to know whats going on. I agree, she isn't attractive

[MadMolly]

Overreaction I'd say, I have friends who pose with their boobs or dicks out until FB catches them :P I don't think its necessary analysing how he knows everyone on his friends list, I have friends I met once at a party and never speak to again but I don't bother removing them... plus I add anyone I work with, regular customers, good- or interesting-looking friends of friends etc :P It's just Facebook. Relax!

[Zephii]

I can't say I wouldn't react badly to that. She looks like a .. ah.. woman of low moral fiber.
You don't need to be acusitory.. I think if I had to broach this subject with Obi I'd be like.. "So, uh, your friend has a very interesting outfit... have you known each other long?" or some such.
If he doesn't know her - and sometimes random people like this will add anyone, often to scam them in some way - you can just ask him to remove her, as if your accounts are linked she'll have access to some of your stuff etc. I wouldn't worry too much at this stage though, it's likely to be nothing.

[Zephii]

Oddly enough I notice all her friends are men...

[silence94652]

the girl looks like one of those internet whores that want as many friends as possible. i think you're fine :] i'm kinda the same way... i get very concerned very fast and i'm trying to get over it. good luck to you!

[aggie]

I'd agree with everything posted above... You definitely shouldn't be worried... Just think of how many friends you have on facebook that don't matter to you at all ... all friends, that you dont speak to, or friends of friends, or people met at parties, that he doesn't know about... because you simply don't talk about them to you.
Also, there is this thing that T. taught me over the two years of our relationship... that whenever you get worried about something, wait 24hours to react. Usually, if it's something important, after 24 hours it's still important and must be discussed. But if it's something minor like that, you just realise that after a day, and that way you don't look like a paranoid girl. (im not saying you do, but definitely i started looking like one, when i would question every single worrying comment on his page or his status or anything that shouldn't really worry me). What im trying to say is, that if you give yourself 24hours it will let you change your perspectives and analyze if its really worth your nerves or not.
Girls are amazing with overreacting... Im jealous of guys that they dont get that

[Alisz]

Bah, another reason why FB is evil :P Don't sweat it. Whether he knows her or not, you're gonna have to trust him anyways. There's no way for you to know what he does everyday and who he talks to. I'm sure my boyfriend has talked to "pretty" girls, but it doesn't bother me because I trust him. They could be someone who serves him coffee or someone he works with, whatever. I talk with "cute" guys too and I'm not interested in them. It's just unavoidable that they will talk with people of the opposite sex. To keep your sanity, just remember that it's you who gets his attention and it's you who he cares about. ^^

[Sarah M]

Thanks, everyone. I emailed him and asked him who the girls were, saying that they didn't look like people he knew. I was right. He didn't know them. He doesn't search to add people, he just accepted them as friends. Once I'd told him about what was on their page, then he looked and deleted them straight away.

I'm not fussed about Matt being friends with pretty girls or anything. I know heaps of girls he's friends with and they're all gorgeous and a lot closer to him than I am. Physically, anyway. But I trust him with all my heart. I was just a little embarrassed to see that on his page, where anyone could see.

So we're all sorted. Yay.

Thank you all.

[Mio]

Ask him who she is, sometimes people add others withou knowing them.

[Sarah M]

Ask him who she is, sometimes people add others withou knowing them.

Yeah... He did that. He just accepts anyone who adds him as a friend. I told him to be wary of that.