how does music affect how you feel about your relationship?

[FDRV]

To preface, this is the second....third significant break in my/our ldr. When we first met she introduced me to a band, I really liked them especially one album. I listened it to a lot on our first major time apart, probably daily, and tbh, the whole time was difficult and a massive countdown until I was with her. I'm on a train tonight listening to the same album. It's not that it wasn't obvious but I must have never realised before, it's totally a break up album. Probably healing for the lead Singer but listening now not what I needed to hear, in places it's down right depressing, especially when I had and have so much to look forward to. I like the album but I don't think ill listen to in the same way again. How has music affected your perception of a relationship, negative and positive just interested to heĆ*r. Also, sorry for any mistakes, posting on my phone!!!

[MeeshaLenee]

This is an awesome topic, thanks for bringing it up!

I don't know if my emotions influence my music listening choices or vice versa, to be honest. Probably a little bit of both.

Recently, I've become uncertain that my relationship is going to work out, and listening to Relient K's album Forget and Not Slow Down has been an...interesting experience for me. I think it's only made me feel worse about things, despite being a great album. But at the same time, I think I was already decided in my heart what was going to happen, and the music just brought it home to me.

So, I guess...I'd say, for me, music enhances what I'm already feeling about the relationship. When I'm happy, I tend to listen to the happy songs that make me feel even better about the relationship. When I'm not so positive about the relationship, I listen to music that reflects my mood and brings me further away from satisfaction with how things are going.

I dunno if that made any sense to anyone or not. >.>

[BabyGund]

So, I guess...I'd say, for me, music enhances what I'm already feeling about the relationship. When I'm happy, I tend to listen to the happy songs that make me feel even better about the relationship. When I'm not so positive about the relationship, I listen to music that reflects my mood and brings me further away from satisfaction with how things are going.

^^^THIS.

[Tara_Lynn]

I have radio syndrome (pretty sure I heard the term on a movie once(. Not sure if many of you have heard of it before, but it's when every song on the radio suddenly seems to revolve around what you are feeling. If you are depressed every song suddenly reflects that (although that maybe because I listen to country when I'm depressed...lol). When you are happy and in love you hear all those pop songs that are bubbly, etc. And when you are worried about your relationship you hear the songs about it not working out when you are down and those that are all about working through it when you have hope.

Music definitely enhances your moods. For good and bad. But there is definitely nothing better than a song coming on that reminds me of my love. Makes me hope that he thinks of me as well when he hears it.

[blankita719]

Agreed with Meesha - I have certain songs that when I am in a funk, I will listen to because they seem to say what I feel so much better than I can. But also the reverse is true...when I am really, really happy I'll listen to upbeat songs. I find it difficult to switch my mood by listening to songs though. If I am in a funk, I'll stay there and no amount of happy love songs will switch that.

Music also really makes me nostalgic. I'll listen to certain songs when I want to remember times in my life - even those that aren't my favorite. I'll always think of my SO whenever I listen to "Motorcycle Drive By" by Third Eye Blind because it fit us perfectly when we broke up the first time. It was difficult to go through but now when I hear it, I enjoy listening and remembering feeling so young and how possibilities seemed endless. But that's probably going off topic. My point it yes, what I am listening to is a direct reflection of what I am feeling.

[LadyMarchHare]

My SO introduced me to a couple of bands/artists in the year we've been together, most of it is heavy metal so it's not exactly the cheeriest stuff on earth but in relation to my relationship even depressing songs from those artists remind me of him and I feel not really 'better' but more like I'm closer to him because it's a shared interest. Hopefully that makes sense. Although there is always one song I listen to when I'm feeling down about my relationship and that's Killswitch Engage's "The End of Heartache" because to me it does embody the pain of being apart from someone.

Music, in general, is therapy for me. When I am angry, I listen to angry songs and let the song scream and curse and vent for me. When I am happy, I listen to happy music. And so on. I make a point to connect every song I listen to, to something whether it's me, someone I know, a part of my life, or just something made up because then it holds greater meaning to me. Songs that I relate to my SO or to our relationship, no matter what the initial message in the song is, are valuable to me in the same way a gift might be.

[LostInLove]

Music is definitely an emotional thing for me. When I'm upset or having a bad day there's nothing better than getting in my car and blasting some music, the more mind-numbing the better. When I'm in a good mood I love dancing along to my favourite tunes. And when a song I love comes on the radio, it can really make my day.

On the converse side, there's a few songs I can't listen to anymore because they remind me too much of my SO and how far away he is right now. They're good songs too, so it makes me kind of sad.

[TknandLvnIt]

My SO and I both grew up listening to the same album over and over so we have that connection whenever we hear that album. We both love the John Mayer Room for Squares album and Evanessence's first album (forgot the name) which came out while we were in h.s. and we both love Jimmy Needham all three of his albums. They all have positive and negative associations or rather make me sad when we are apart ,we just ended a visit or we are fighting. Music definitely has a powerful affect on your mood though!

[kiara_silver]

Sometimes i'll listen to a song or song will come on and i somehow find a way to relate to the lyrics and i'll cry lol or ill just feel moved by the words. Or it will make me feel uplifted or miss him or.... yeah music sometimes effects my moods pretty strongly.

[leonsfangirl]

GREAT THREAD!!!

Music is a HUGE part of my life and my SO's, we share alot of songs (well he sends me tracks, he's not a fan of the music i listen too)
Music effects my mood hugely, certain songs will depress me,others make me smile, a have about 5 that remind me of my SO but there's 2 that i wish didn't as they are quite negative and my SO is the same.
Music i feel has added depth to our relationship, another way to communicate our feelings be they happy or sad. This quote sums it up for me, but i don't know who said it.
"Music lets you know your not alone. That someone else has felt that same way before and they were kind enough to put it into words."

[leonsfangirl]

GREAT THREAD!!!

Music is a HUGE part of my life and my SO's, we share alot of songs (well he sends me tracks, he's not a fan of the music i listen too)
Music effects my mood hugely, certain songs will depress me,others make me smile, a have about 5 that remind me of my SO but there's 2 that i wish didn't as they are quite negative and my SO is the same.
Music i feel has added depth to our relationship, another way to communicate our feelings be they happy or sad. This quote sums it up for me, but i don't know who said it.
"Music lets you know your not alone. That someone else has felt that same way before and they were kind enough to put it into words."

[NaNi]

When My SO and I met for the first time in person we listened to a lot of music. Either on TV or on the radio while driving around her city. I especially liked this one Kiwi song and turned the volume up whenever I heard it. I didn't pay attention to the lyrics at first, but when I did I realized that it was about falling in love with someone. Which I did. It's still one of my favourite songs because it's upbeat, positive and such a good summer song. There are other songs as well which makes us think about each other whenever we listen to them.

[loveknowsnodistance27]

Music is a huge part of both my own life and my SO's life. We both have music playing I'd say at least 60% of our day, maybe more. The music I choose to listen to does go along with my mood from time to time. If I feel like I miss my boy, I will either listen to "our song", or more positive music to help me realize it's going to be okay, or even listen to sad music if I feel like I just need to let my emotions out. I've noticed I won't listen to songs that deal with breakups and heartache in fear of putting negative thoughts/negative Chi into the universe. My boyfriend and I have similar musical tastes, and I've noticed some of what he listens to when he's down will make me feel better too if I'm feeling down. If I listen to the radio and I feel a certain way, I notice certain songs come on related to how I'm feeling as well. Music has most certainly helped me through many days where I just felt so sad about the distance and missed my boyfriend to no end. I don't know how I would have gotten by, so it definitely influences my relationship, and when we're together Anthony and I tend to share the common bond of music too.