Went to Prom with my ex.

[luna_banana]

I broke up with him about 3 months ago, but all of the tickets were already booked so I flew down to Texas to see my old friends and go to Senior Prom with him. When he saw me again for the first time since December, all of the memories came back to him and were so painful that he left 10 minutes after prom started.

I was pissed but had a great night anyways with my girl friends. But then the last two nights, he asked me to go out for ice cream with him. We talked for a long time. He says that he still loves me and that he'd do anything to start over knowing what he knows now, and not let his insecurities and jealousy ruin the relationship. But we aren't going to the same college, he didn't get accepted to any of the places I may go. And I really don't want to commit to a long distance relationship right now, knowing that it would be at least 4 years before we could close the distance, especially with a guy I recently broke up with because I was unhappy in the relationship. However, I still have feelings for him and if we were to live closer to each other, I'd be willing to try again immediately.

Seeing him again revived all of the memories of the past 2 years, when we were happy and in love, and before his paranoia completely destroyed us. Can I believe that he's changed now, after having his heart broken and going to counseling for attempted suicide? Should I give him another chance?

Additional info: I live in North Carolina and he lives in Texas. The colleges we're planning to go to are each in our respective regions of the country. We dated for 2 years but broke up in January. When I broke up with him he completely lost it: tried to kill himself, injured himself constantly, and started doing drugs again. I feel very guilty about these things, but I know it also serves as proof that the relationship was unhealthy.

[LadyMarchHare]

First off, don't feel guilty that he went the self-destructive route. Chances are if it hadn't been the break up he would've cracked about something else and done any if not all of those things anyway. He consciously chose to do them, you did not put a gun to his head for any of it.

On the same note if it's only been 3 months since this happened and he's getting help for it, it's honestly way too soon to say if he's going to be better or not from that much less any issues he had before the break up such as the paranoia. Stuff like that takes a long time to work out without running risk of a relapse and even then there is no guarantee. If you think either one of you can handle it I would try to stay at a friends-only level not only because he's still in the process of getting better, but you mentioned you do not want to be in a LDR with 4 years between you and closing the distance. Maybe somewhere down the road things will change, you never know, but since he runs the risk of becoming volatile and destructive again it's probably in your sanity's best interest to not rekindle old flames.

[MadMolly]

From my experience... don't go there again hun

[leonsfangirl]

If you have doubts (which sounds like you have quite a few) then i would do as LadyMarchHare said and stay friends for a while until you can honestly and truly see it being better 2nd time around. Going into any relationship half-hearted won't be good for either of you and may set his recovery back should things not work out.
Support him as a friend through his recovery, don't blame yourself for past events and focus on having a healthier relationship in the future.