Talking Too Much

[Kyla]

I'm curious as to whether or not any of you feel that you can have too much contact with your SO.

How often are you and your SO in contact (is it through phone calls, texts, skype...)? Is there an amount that you think would be classified as too much?

[snow_girl]

My so talks too much sometimes! Haha but I guess thats not what you meant. Lately we've been talking lots but we've had nothing to say since both of us have just been working. I think skyping more then 3 times a week is too much especially when we usually will drop a short email everyday. It doesn't leave many other things to talk about when we video chat.

[beaton]

I think it's possible to talk too much, and end up straining the relationship. At first, we didn't talk enough(at least for me), like once a week on the phone and maybe one text a day. Then we started calling each other more often- like 2-3x a week. Then we started g-chatting every day while he was at work as well. That was too much. We had nothing new to say and it just felt weird. Now I just hop online to say hey, and save the conversation for when we talk on the phone, which is maybe 2x a week.

[bigmac62]

Usually, we IM for about an hour every night, and that seems to be just right for us. To be honest, I think the concept of "talking too much" really depends on the couple youre talking about. If it's a couple just starting out, then once a day seems just about right. If you maybe have been together for longer, maybe you can hold off a day or so before talking to them again. Those are just guidelines, however...like i said, it's different for each couple.

[FadedSunrise]

Yea, it's definitely different for each couple. When we'd just gotten to know each other, and I'd come back from China in December from December to about March we talked practically everyday we could, which almost turned out to be hours and hours everyday. Now that we've gotten busier, it's gotten to be less. And also, we've gotten out all of our getting to know each other questions, which used to take a lot of time. Now the time frame is about 1-2x a week for a couple of hours.

[NaNi]

We're only able to talk once a week through Skype, so it's definitely not too much. At all. It could be more really. We also email each other every day.

[13000km]

We text during the day if possible, IM during lunch and skype all night. It seems the only time we are not in contact is when I'm asleep, and even then he still texts (there's a 15 hour time difference so it's his day time when I'm asleep and I love waking up in the morning to his texts). Is that too much? I don't think so. Do we run out of things to talk about? Sure.

Skype time does not necessarily mean talking to us. It's the time of the day we get to see each other's faces and just be in each other's company. We do talk, but also spend the time we're not talking doing our own stuff. We've talked every day since the day we met, with the exception of when I was out of the country. I find skype very different from talking on the phone. With skype, it's kind of like we're in the same room and doing every day end-of-the-day routine, but on the phone, there is a pressure to keep the conversation going because even if your conversation fades out, you still have one hand glued to your face, which makes doing things a little bit harder.

I think "too much" means something different to each couple, and you just have to find what you're comfortable with and stick with it. (:

[Lissy]

I agree with what others have said about it depending on the couple. Sometimes it takes time and a handful of different approaches for people to find the right balance of quality time.

Personally, I'm in constant contact with my SO. We text all throughout the day, IM for a couple hours every night, and sleep together on Skype most nights (can you tell we're not super-busy? haha). This works for us and we like it that way, though I know that would be too much for some couples.

[jennyjellybeans]

For me and my SO, we've had contacted with each other pretty much everyday since we met up until now (because he's gone on business). Since my SO is only an hour ahead of me, our times are pretty much perfectly set when we can communicate. So we do through Skype, text messege, fring, MSN, or email. We talk at night after my schooling's done and he's done with all his work and even when he works late, he usually would make time like an hour or so to talk to me even if he was exhausted from all his work. However, all this communication has its downsides. I noticed we had trouble talking simply because we had nothing new really to talk about and we've done practically all the 1000 questions we can. :P When we'd Skype, we'd be all quiet until he thought up a flirt or made a funny face at me which would end up with an hour full of strange faces back at him.

Anyway! I guess you'd "classify" my time with my SO as 'too much'. lol. But of course it actually never feels enough for me. :/ No matter how odd it gets sitting in silence with him on Skype, i still enjoy staring at him, or making faces at him when he's not looking.

All in all, if you get alot of time with your SO, its great! And really lucky because some couples can't have that, but its good to draw back alittle from the communication simply because you run out of things to talk about. xD Unless your just really good at making conversation with him/her. Then its not a problem i guess!

[Dziubka]

Like everyone said, it depends on the couple.
For me the idea of "talking too much" to your SO is something I can't even quite imagine. I can't imagine having nothing to say to my boyfriend.
We talk everyday for about 1 - 2 hours, sent a lot of texts during the day and the occasional e-mail (plus I have a private blog, where I sometimes write him stuff).
If nothing has been going on during my day and there are no current affairs, we want to discuss then I just tell him how much I love him and how perfect a boyfriend (person!) he is. There's also almost always something about our visits and planning visits that we need to talk about... and oh... a million things.
For me the time we get on skype is never enough. Hell, even when we're visiting and together 24/7, I quite feel like I don't have enough time to tell him everything I have to tell him.
I know it's different for others and it's fine, but I know it wouldn't work for me.

[Darth_Taco]

I believe talking too much can be summed up in a few ways:

When it interferes in your everyday life.

When it interferes in your other relationships.

When you become so dependent on the person you literately cannot function. (though this can be achieved through many other means)

A lot of people seem to think they suffer from the last one. Once in a while when you feel so crappy from not hearing from the one your love that you don't want to do a damn thing is perfectly normal in my opinion. We all get that from time to time because let's face it, this situation sucks ;_;. What I'm talking about are people who absolutely need to talk to the person every damn day all freaking day that if, Lord forbid, they go an hour without hearing from them they'll go halfway suicidal @_@! Remember, just because you're part of a couple, it doesn't mean you lose your right to be an independent individual. If my cripple ass can get shit done without Enrique, so can most other people. For new people, yet I cam physically handicap. It sucks, but I survive.

[Jonesonaboat]

We're in constant contact.

We sleep together (well with a 8 hour difference it's usually I go to sleep then when I wake up he goes to sleep) every night we can on Skype. We use ping chat to keep in touch and as I only work in a fast food restaurant I get plenty of time to just bum around and send him messages. He's a paramedic so when he's not on call he's constantly messaging me. We'll always leave each other messages to wake up to on ping chat also.

Our work time tables usually work out quite well too. His day shift hours and my last shift hours are exactly the same, so we can Skype up until we both have to leave, and we're home pretty much the same time give or take half hour.

His late shift starts when I would finish one of my lates so that's the only time we'd clash and I think that's only happened once or twice. So otherwise we're almost always skyping.

If he has to go out and to shopping and things he'll do it once I've gone to sleep, but we'll leave Skype on. And I'll go do my business while he's asleep. It really works for us and neither of us could imagine going more than a day without contact.

[Zapookie]

I think it can get a bit too much. We're both really independent people, and both like our alone time. Also not skyping all the time gives us a chance to miss each other. If we're not skyping, we'll talk on FB or MSN. I think we prefer it better.. we did go through a phase of skyping all the time but we couldn't stop talking and it was keeping him up til 6am (time difference), so that wasn't healthy for him. We don't go a day without contact though.

[princessmeg1328]

In comparison to a lot of people, it seems like my SO and I don't very much. We e-mail each other every weekday while he's at work, but by 11am my time, he's done. We skype three times a week. On Tuesdays, we only skype for an hour and then he has to go to bed so he can wake up for work the net day. On Sundays and Fridays, we skype for about two or three hours then he either has to go to bed or I have to go to work. We text sometimes, but we're really trying to cut back on that because international texting is so expensive. It works for us though. We always have something to talk about when we skype.
Like other people have said, I think it depends on the couple. However, I also think there is definitely a way to talk too much. That's part of the reason why my SO and I only skype three times a week.

[Kristie]

Posting this, makes me feel I have no life haha.

My SO and I talk a lot.

During the weekdays we talk 30 - 60 min in the morning, if we aren't busy at work we are on FB or during his breaks he calls me. When he gets off work he calls and vice versa. Then before going to sleep we have to wish each others good night , but it ends up being 1-2hr talk.

We used to text a lot, but now we text occasionally. We do have 2 skype nights.

During the weekend it really depends. If we aren't doing anything with friends we usually spend time with each other, by watching movies or playing games.