Talking Too Much

[SDPersona]

In the beginning of our relationship, like the first and second month, we used to have skype nights everyday for hours and it was fine too, since we don't really have to deal with that much of a time difference. After we got that talking frenzy out of our system, there was much less to talk about and he felt we need to draw back on our 'date' times, because the Missing-You-And-Wanting-To-Come Syndrome got too much. I agreed and now our routine of seeing each other every two to three days works just fine for us. We do text each other sometimes, when one of us gets the urge of saying I love you or just has seen something that made us think about the other.

[Sano]

I was kind of worried that I was asking for too much attention. We used to talk like everyday but that was in the very beginning but we used to talk alot more frequently than we do now. We both have the same phone company so calling between our cell phones is free. But it dwindled down to like once every week or every other week and I started complaining about it because I felt like I needed more attention than he was giving me because he didn't text either unless I texted him. So I was thinking that was just me being selfish and needy. (it probably is) but we talked so infrequently I was kind of like ....do I even still have a bf? o.O (then what I really mad about but were times where he text me and promise to talk but then never called especially since I went to the doctor and got some results that really freaked me out and a text messages just wasn't going to do the trick)


>.> so he says he's going to try harder and we have been talked for past couple of days

[AllieCat1989]

Me & my fiance talk a lot. But I hate when we don't. I think it's because we lived together for over 2 years and neither had jobs outside of the house (I made cakes from home and he took care of his parents/makes video games/writes) and so we're used to spending pretty much all the time together. I think it's irritating when he gets mad when I don't respond right away or whatever, but I guess I do the same lol. I think if we never lived together talking less would be okay. But at this point it doesn't feel right.

[Trethsparr]

I believe talking too much can be summed up in a few ways:

When it interferes in your everyday life.

When it interferes in your other relationships.

When you become so dependent on the person you literately cannot function. (though this can be achieved through many other means)

A lot of people seem to think they suffer from the last one. Once in a while when you feel so crappy from not hearing from the one your love that you don't want to do a damn thing is perfectly normal in my opinion. We all get that from time to time because let's face it, this situation sucks ;_;. What I'm talking about are people who absolutely need to talk to the person every damn day all freaking day that if, Lord forbid, they go an hour without hearing from them they'll go halfway suicidal @_@! Remember, just because you're part of a couple, it doesn't mean you lose your right to be an independent individual. If my cripple ass can get shit done without Enrique, so can most other people. For new people, yet I cam physically handicap. It sucks, but I survive.

Word. ^^^

The amount of communication changes over time, too. When we were first CD, we were together all the time, but the relationship was also still quite new. We used to talk on Skype basically every night, too, to try to make up for the fact we were long distance at first, but work and school started getting in the way of that. Nevertheless, we adjusted and were more content with our situation. We don't need to talk all the time to maintain the same level in our relationship.

Now we usually talk for a few minutes on the cell, send maybe a daily text or two, and Skype 2-3 time a week on average. We both have had a lot on our plate up until recently (I still do with finishing up our wedding plans), and we find that talking for long periods of time all the time can really distract us from our responsibilities. (Not to mention the fact that you can run out of news/stuff to talk about pretty darn quick.) I enjoy the time I do have with him, but I don't freak out if I miss a few days of seeing him here and there.

[Sierra]

My boyfriend and I have had an almost constant conversation going for almost two years now via IM.

We talk to each other from work all day and despite the time difference, we spend our afternoons together - we then spend a few hours apart or have 'date night' and talk the whole time then, and then reconvene around bed time to talk for awhile longer. He's busy Monday nights so that's really the only time we don't talk, oh and sometimes Fridays, if I go to sleep when he's not home.

We both have our lives, and he can text me while I'm out but we know we'll talk at some point during the day. If one of us won't make it to the computer that's when we reach for the phone.

[Butterfly]

We talk at some point every day.. We talk on the phone almost every night and Skype about 2-3 times a week..

In addition to that we are always texting throughout the day. Thank GOD for text! It's nice to be able to stay connected even though you are far apart and unable to actually "talk."

[Hannahbaby16]

Well, from the begining of our relationship we ALWAYS talked. wether it be by phone,texting,facebook or xbox! (LOL)
we just felt like we needed to talk as much as we could.

As of now, we pretty much talk every day. Even in between periods at school.
It's great. but, of course i still have to give him freedom when hes out with friends. I trust him so it's okay.

I don't think you could ever talk too much. It's Long Distance. It's kind of all we can do anyway.

[Alexandria Lora]

Gosh.. We still talk every day and the amount of time varies from 30 minutes to 4 hours. I agree with most that all relationships are particular to its own rhythm; not all relationships follow the same methods or time tables of communication. I also believe that trying to find a specific amount or way in communication can cause issues because you always look for it to follow that standard. It sounds to me that you know your limit in communicating with your SO and maybe you should talk to him about it too so you both are on the same page. Its all about getting on the same page that makes whatever your communicating scenarios all satisfying. Hope this helps

[what2do]

hello i'm new here..first post. my boyfriend and i actually lived together for about a year out of state and i had to move back home due to money and health issues.we broke up due to that but then he called me up sayin he missed me,he wanted to get married,etc so of course i took him back.we both are not good at long distance,but at least we are not roommates and at each others throats like we were. the distance has been good for us. you truly dont know what you've got till its gone. we miss each other more now.we text everyday.sometimes he texts me while hes at work and other times he doesnt cuz he stays busy at work.he will call a few times throughout the week but its usually like a 5-10 phone conversation and it really makes me mad cuz i'm the type that wants to talk for hours on the phone (im currently not working and have alot of time) hes not a phone person at all.the best time for us to talk is on his off days.i expressed my concern to him that i feel like we dont talk enough and he assures me im on his mind all day everyday from when hes at work till he goes to bed. i can't get him to write me a letter to save his life.i just find it odd us being long distance he should want to talk on the phone right or make an effort to write me?in person he has alot to talk about,but on the phone hes silent. i miss him

[redbellepepper]

we activated our mobile internet, so our YM's are open 24/7. we don't log off unless we have connection issues or aviation security tells us to sign off. battery ran-off isn't even a problem. we are both available and accessible to each other ALWAYS.

is it too much? hihihihi

[Eyelids Bare]

This is something that has been on my mind for some time as well... It actually feels strange now. We got to a point where we would talk every night and at the time it was great. We bother really were going through a rough spot. Her more then me it seems but still... Mostly we would ramble and it was great and fun. But now that everything has been shifting for both of us with getting our lives in order we talk far less. Granted circumstances being what they are, since she has been healing from some time at the hospital. Its been a really hard few weeks. I think some of my security was questioned when all of a sudden we were no longer talking all the time. Which is not like me at all. In my past LDR we would maybe talk 2 - 3 times a week, maybe a little online. Email here and there and it kept things fresh. When asked what have you been up too, I'd have a real reply... And so would she. With this one, I think we sort of lost sight of things. Which I feel is very easy to do, if you start out in our situation where you really had no intention of getting so heavily involved. It was just very natural. But it has made the nights very hard when I don't hear from her. Logically I know why. She has even told me all there really is to say on her side and nothing has changed with us. Just become re-arranged. But heart and mind are two different beasts!! The best thing to do is find the place in between that I feel I am currently struggling to find. We really had lost touch of things, because we sort of just spaced out for a few months talking every night... We forgot about our own lives. Because at the time, neither of us had one. And mostly neither of us still do, but we are both working on that in our own ways. Anyyyyyy way. Short of the long, find a balance. It is easier to do it now then to backtrack and find it. IMO atleast.

[MissButterfly]

I've been talking to my SO on skype every night since we've started dating, which was over two months ago. Except when I was in Rome and didn't have any connections. He sends me a goodmorning message on facebook every day, and I love waking up and reading them. He's such a poet! We've never ran out of things to talk about, there's a seven hour time difference between us, so we can talk for an hour every night, and longer on the weekends. We pretty much talk about everything, and when we don't, just looking at each other and doing some other stuff feels great aswell. 'Too much' is indeed different for every couple!

[nicole]

We talk every day. 30 mins-1 hour in the morning, then for however long it takes for me to get sleepy on a night time, seeing as I'm 5 hours ahead. But usually in the morning, we don't talk much, we just hang out quietly and read the news or whatever, because I'm usually still tired (at 10am haha) and he's just woken up. We email during the day too, if my schedule allows it. If I don't see him in a day, I'll drop him a pm before I go to bed; we used to record messages on youtube, but he can't get his webcam to work on the Mac for youtube so it dropped to pm's, which is fine

On a weekend we hang out all day on skype, if we don't have other plans, again, we don't talk all the time, we watch movies, surf the internet ect; just like we used to do CD, we just like being in each other's presence sometimes, even though we aren't actually talking.

It's weird, I used to go for days without the desire of any human contact whatsoever, now with my SO, I hate not talking or having any contact at all with people in general, not just my SO. I've come out of my shell quite a bit.

[Micah]

My SO and I normally have a nightly phone call and a few texts throughout the day. There are times where we skip the nightly phone call because of various reasons, like having plans with friends, being tired, etc. Sometimes the call is only 5 minutes if neither of us really have anything to say, but oftentimes it is about 30-45 minutes.

I think it is possible to talk too much, but it depends on the person, I suppose. I know people that are in a LDR that talk multiple times a day on the phone, basically every hour or two, and I just think that would get on my nerves. I don't like to be tied to my phone all day long and neither does my SO. We are kind of an atypical LDR because we don't skype or use the computer for communication at all. This works great for us, but some people desire more or less communication. I must admit if we don't have our nightly phone call, I miss him way more than usual in the morning and we can't wait until that night to talk. It is important to find a balance between communicating with your SO and everything else going on in life.

[kteire]

My SO and I IM on skype for about 2-3 hours after work every night. And on weekends, we've sometimes talked for 12 hours straight, I kid you not! We live-skype about once a week, sometimes less than that, because I live with my mum, and she's got boundary issues. So we prefer to skype when she's not home.
And if I can't talk to him one night, I like to send him an email or something on facebook.
We can't text. I'm annoyed. He's checked everything with his company in Ireland, I've checked everything with mine here, and while he can get my texts, for some reason NO ONE can figure out, I can't get his.