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**LadyMarchHare** · May 13, 2011, 04:45 AM

Unless your SO is giving you solid reasons to believe he is going to turn his back on you and go to this girl who is pretty much just saying "take me please" you'd do better ignoring/blocking her and not letting someone else's desperation bother you. If this whole situation is bothering you that much, and I mean so much you can't not be bothered no matter how hard you try, you need to talk to him about how she is making you feel with her comments (I would refrain from calling her names or insulting her, it's childish) and ask that he either set her straight as far as how she is acting or not have anything to do with her anymore.

There are going to be people who want to wheedle their way in to people even if they're taken, regardless of whether or not their lover or spouse is living with them or miles away. You can't let it get under your skin because at the end of the day he is with YOU and unless he ends it with you, it's going to stay that way. Just because your partner "changes" doesn't mean they're trolling for booty.

**Rugger** · May 13, 2011, 05:19 AM

I agree with LMH, as always. Unless your SO has given you some reason to doubt him, don't. He's most likely as annoyed by this wench as you are. Ignore her, she is beneath your concern. You have to be confident in your relationship

**leonsfangirl** · May 13, 2011, 05:26 AM

Originally posted by LadyMarchHare View Post

Unless your SO is giving you solid reasons to believe he is going to turn his back on you and go to this girl who is pretty much just saying "take me please" you'd do better ignoring/blocking her and not letting someone else's desperation bother you. If this whole situation is bothering you that much, and I mean so much you can't not be bothered no matter how hard you try, you need to talk to him about how she is making you feel with her comments (I would refrain from calling her names or insulting her, it's childish) and ask that he either set her straight as far as how she is acting or not have anything to do with her anymore.

There are going to be people who want to wheedle their way in to people even if they're taken, regardless of whether or not their lover or spouse is living with them or miles away. You can't let it get under your skin because at the end of the day he is with YOU and unless he ends it with you, it's going to stay that way. Just because your partner "changes" doesn't mean they're trolling for booty.

Exactly that!

I had a chick try that with my SO, i told him it bugged me and we sorted it out. Had it the other way too. Unless you tell him how you feel he won't know.
Try and chill out, changes over a few days can be any number of things.... maybe he's tired/feeling ill/stressed or just having a bad day.

**JEREIANEDREI** · May 13, 2011, 08:04 AM

thanks guys for the advices....I appreciated your opinions...
I already talked to him about this matter,,that I'm being annoyed with this bitchy...but we are just havin' argues,he said im acting too much..I trust my man a lot,,but I dont know why i feel this way of this girls intention,,it really bothers me,,to feel that my SO is continously havin' communication with this flirty girl,,though he said he dont actually knew this girl...I feel insecurity as I saw the girls info in FB, to know that the girl have,everything that my SO's parents and family like for him "AN IDEAL GIRL",,since they are rich and I'm just a poor girl,,who don't have any degree or whatsoever in life that this girl have...the last time I'd tried to get more info to this girl,I found out that she's in Vegas,.to knwo that he's just an hour away to my man,.to know that anytime they can see each other,,as the girl keep on messaging my man,,I feel that she's making the move just to get my man,,.I dont know how to make myself calm...I feel down and scared of losing my man...since I've been fooled for so many times,,with my past relationship...I'm tired of being always left alone...I told myself if this man will left me,,I dont know what will happen to me...

**Sano** · May 13, 2011, 09:40 AM

I hate people that try to break up relationships ESPECIALLY when they know in advance the person is commited. She's not worth getting upset over so dont give her the satisfaction.

**JEREIANEDREI** · May 13, 2011, 09:57 AM

Originally posted by Sano View Post

I hate people that try to break up relationships ESPECIALLY when they know in advance the person is commited. She's not worth getting upset over so dont give her the satisfaction.

so what will I gonna do?...I feel helpless....Its drivin me crazy

**Sano** · May 13, 2011, 10:34 AM

First, If he's not interested in her he should not be talking to her. Since its bothering you so much you should just tell him out right that he needs to block her. If theres nothing going on it shouldn't be a big deal. And try to calm down, money is not everything. My bf parents would prefer if I were white but they can go sit on a volcano and keep wishing for all I care. If this guy really loves you it doesn't matter what she has and you dont. Yeah, his parents support of you would be nice but then again you're not dating his parents you're dating him. I went through a simillar situation and it got so bad I wanted to be done with him completely but we talked (I vented on here ... alot >.>) and we got through it. Dont let this betch get you so upset chickie.

**LadyMarchHare** · May 13, 2011, 03:26 PM

Originally posted by JEREIANEDREI View Post

thanks guys for the advices....I appreciated your opinions...
I already talked to him about this matter,,that I'm being annoyed with this bitchy...but we are just havin' argues,he said im acting too much..I trust my man a lot,,but I dont know why i feel this way of this girls intention,,it really bothers me,,to feel that my SO is continously havin' communication with this flirty girl,,though he said he dont actually knew this girl...I feel insecurity as I saw the girls info in FB, to know that the girl have,everything that my SO's parents and family like for him "AN IDEAL GIRL",,since they are rich and I'm just a poor girl,,who don't have any degree or whatsoever in life that this girl have...the last time I'd tried to get more info to this girl,I found out that she's in Vegas,.to knwo that he's just an hour away to my man,.to know that anytime they can see each other,,as the girl keep on messaging my man,,I feel that she's making the move just to get my man,,.I dont know how to make myself calm...I feel down and scared of losing my man...since I've been fooled for so many times,,with my past relationship...I'm tired of being always left alone...I told myself if this man will left me,,I dont know what will happen to me...

You're running yourself into the ground with negative thoughts. You are letting it become far too personal with you when honestly she's not your problem. She's an aggravation, sure, but you don't know her enough to tell her personally to knock it off and if your SO is not making any move to tell her to zip her lip and move on then it's either time to accept that she's just going to be an annoyance or you can block her and never have to look at her or her posts on Facebook ever again. As for his family's idea of the "perfect girl" for him, 9 times out of 10 no one is going to marry the person their parents find ideal for them because they are different people with different standards as far as attraction.

You're probably going to ignore this or say it's negative but I seriously, seriously think you need to get into some form of counseling or therapy. Not because you're crazy but because the counselor can help you think more positively and feel better about yourself and your relationship so you aren't always feeling like he's going to leave you if you so much as sneeze wrong. You need a huge boost in self confidence and since it seems for whatever reason your SO is not going to be the one to help you with that, you need to act like an adult and do it for yourself. Low self esteem is considered unattractive and if you continue to act this way it could honestly jeopardize your relationship.

**JEREIANEDREI** · May 13, 2011, 03:34 PM

Originally posted by Sano View Post

First, If he's not interested in her he should not be talking to her. Since its bothering you so much you should just tell him out right that he needs to block her. If theres nothing going on it shouldn't be a big deal. And try to calm down, money is not everything. My bf parents would prefer if I were white but they can go sit on a volcano and keep wishing for all I care. If this guy really loves you it doesn't matter what she has and you dont. Yeah, his parents support of you would be nice but then again you're not dating his parents you're dating him. I went through a simillar situation and it got so bad I wanted to be done with him completely but we talked (I vented on here ... alot >.>) and we got through it. Dont let this betch get you so upset chickie.

yah,money doesnt mean anything to me,,ITS HIM that matters to me,,I grew up in a simple living,all I want is to be LOVED and not to be rich...I feel emotionally and mentally stressed by now...btw thanks for the advice!

**prinzeza87** · May 13, 2011, 03:40 PM

stay strong n positive, dnt let this issue get u like this, keep trusting ur man, wat i would do apart from talking about this to my SO is ask him to delete n block her n even with more reason if nothing its going on. so calm down n really ask him to stop any contact with this girl so u will feel more calm. good luck hon.

**kiara_silver** · May 13, 2011, 05:26 PM

i can understand jealousy, i to am jealous more than i would ever admit, and about little things. But you need to just trust your SO. If he isn't acting on anything she says, and he has no interest in her then you shouldn't let it get to you to much. Course let him know how you feel about it, but if its out in the open, hes not secretly talking to her and he chooses you over hier then i think you need to try to let go of the worries. Its going to eat you up and make you crazy, our imaginations can be horrible, they run wild sometimes. But just keep the communication with your SO open, but give your trust. like everyone else said, stay calm and relax

**JEREIANEDREI** · May 13, 2011, 07:22 PM

thanks guys....

**Sano** · May 14, 2011, 07:27 AM

No problem. Worrying so much isn't healthy and I should know. The problems we had early in my relationship were hard on us both. And I think it really came down to two things on both sides.
1. lack of self confidence : wondering what he/she sees in me that I dont see. And wondering if what I have is enough to keep her/him satisfied and faithful
2. Fear of the uncertain : This is starting to become a really serious relationship and I dont want to get hurt so I need to make sure you really really care about me or are you just wasting my time before I go all in for this

Im actually suprised that we got through all of that together. If he wanted to leave that tough patch we had would've been the perfect time. And there must be something special about him that made me stick it out too. Im suprised at myself too really XD
----Anyway! My point is, find a way to de-stress and communicate honestly to each other and you'll get through it too

**JEREIANEDREI** · May 14, 2011, 03:21 PM

thanks for the advice....

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