Signs

[Sierra]

My boyfriend and I are just really starting out, but we've been talking for awhile. Mostly, he talks about the future with us together. It's something that's hard for me to do, because I'm insecure about the long distance thing.

But when I say something like 'someday I'd like to have a southern home with hammocks' he'll follow it up with 'and rocking chairs on the porch so we can watch the grandchildren play in the yard'. It makes me realize that he doesn't think of me as a temporary person in his life.

When we first met, the first time I was in his arms, he said he just wanted to come home to me every day, have me in his arms every day, and I said me too. He just really puts forth the effort to talk about the future and us still being involved and noting how close we are.

It's hard for me because I was engaged before but called it off, so I"m just ... terrified. But I'm working on giving him that security from my end, but as someone else says, the relationship will only go one of two ways ... breakup or marriage.

[Mizpah]

I can't explain Aaron and me. I can't explain what we share. All I know is that when he picked me on that silly Facebook app, and persisted his way into my life, that we fell naturally into a friendship deeper than any we had ever experienced. It was as though we had known each other for years, and while I don't believe in reincarnation or past lives, it was as if we'd had lifetimes of knowing and loving each other. Our feelings for each other were quick to bloom, and while I was a close-to-the-vest sort and fresh out of a two year engagement, three year relationship, I risked starting a relationship with someone I had never met, someone who lived 300 miles away. Then I risked a first meeting, risked taking a Greyhound to visit him and his family, and risked ending the distance just three months in. I found the one person worth risking it all for, and he lead me away from the comfortzone I had danced on the lines of, but never left. He taught me things, shared in new experiences with me, and his every word and action proved to me that we would be together forever. In fact, I knew that at our first meeting, after our first kiss, when we looked into each others' eyes. It amazed me that I was a part of that couple, the kind I had looked at with a mixture of awe, envy, and disbelief. The kind that doesn't usually exist outside of movies and novels, but when it does, everyone notices. Simply put, we flowed naturally, things clicked, others fell into place, and we found ourself on the same page, at the right time and place. When that happens, there simply is no question. Really, I know that life isn't certain, and that there's always a chance that circumstance could come between us, but I also know we love each other and will fight for that until the end.

[Rach321]

I can't explain Aaron and me. I can't explain what we share. All I know is that when he picked me on that silly Facebook app, and persisted his way into my life, that we fell naturally into a friendship deeper than any we had ever experienced. It was as though we had known each other for years, and while I don't believe in reincarnation or past lives, it was as if we'd had lifetimes of knowing and loving each other. Our feelings for each other were quick to bloom, and while I was a close-to-the-vest sort and fresh out of a two year engagement, three year relationship, I risked starting a relationship with someone I had never met, someone who lived 300 miles away. Then I risked a first meeting, risked taking a Greyhound to visit him and his family, and risked ending the distance just three months in. I found the one person worth risking it all for, and he lead me away from the comfortzone I had danced on the lines of, but never left. He taught me things, shared in new experiences with me, and his every word and action proved to me that we would be together forever. In fact, I knew that at our first meeting, after our first kiss, when we looked into each others' eyes. It amazed me that I was a part of that couple, the kind I had looked at with a mixture of awe, envy, and disbelief. The kind that doesn't usually exist outside of movies and novels, but when it does, everyone notices. Simply put, we flowed naturally, things clicked, others fell into place, and we found ourself on the same page, at the right time and place. When that happens, there simply is no question. Really, I know that life isn't certain, and that there's always a chance that circumstance could come between us, but I also know we love each other and will fight for that until the end.

Beautiful Mizpah! Except for the part about getting engaged/married quickly (we've known each other for 9 years!), this is very close to our story too. Well, maybe not exactly. We haven't been together all 9 years, and we haven't always been on the same page in terms of our relationship. But I definitely can understand your feelings. Strangers have been asking us since we first met how long we've been married or when we will marry, even when we weren't officially a couple. We've had many ups and downs, but since the first time I really sat down and talked to him, I felt at home. I still do.

[Mizpah]

Beautiful Mizpah! Except for the part about getting engaged/married quickly (we've known each other for 9 years!), this is very close to our story too. Well, maybe not exactly. We haven't been together all 9 years, and we haven't always been on the same page in terms of our relationship. But I definitely can understand your feelings. Strangers have been asking us since we first met how long we've been married or when we will marry, even when we weren't officially a couple. We've had many ups and downs, but since the first time I really sat down and talked to him, I felt at home. I still do.

Thanks, Rach It's a wonderful feeling, isn't it? Finding that one person worth the risk, the fight, who will stand by you through it all...I know just what you mean when you say you felt at home! Aaron and I had that same comfort from the very beginning, and we have often said we are each others' home, because really where we are physically does not matter as long as we are together. And in the last year and a half, until we finally settled into good jobs and a home of our own, we have had some pretty awful conditions! Living with his family for nine months in NC, at first was wonderful, but their dramas and pressures made it miserable. Not to mention we had the upstairs when their air conditioning broke and we couldn't get a repair for WEEKS. Then we lived with my parents in WV, an arrangement we had hoped would only last a couple weeks until our apartment in WV was ready, but it was a month and some change and the landlady never did finish the apartment, and my parents returned to their usual cycle of mistreating me. So we left, and a friend and her husband took us in for two months. And treated us like tenants instead of friends (we didn't mind paying their rent and helping with groceries, but they took it all to an extreme. Her husband even threw a cup I had been drinking from and some trash at me in anger because he thought I was going to leave it out). Then we lived in his brother and roommate's hallway for nearly a month after moving to WI until we found our apartment. I am exhausted just thinking of it! Without him, I would have gone crazy, I'm sure of it. When we were leaving the bus station after I arrived, an elderly man asked if I was his wife It's wonderful when people see that bond.
I am so happy that you found this kind of love too.

[Gelfling]

I realized that my SO and I have a really good chance at going the distance when I realized that I can tell him anything-- good, bad, inane, or just plain weird. At worst, I might tell him that I'm feeling vulnerable about a subject but I need to tell him about it, and then I do. Not only that, but even when we disagree, we're respectful to each other about it. There's no calling names, no insinuating that the other is crazy/bad/wrong, just an honest discussion of our differences and a search for common ground.

[kteire]

Another thing to add to the reasons that I know my SO is the person I want in my life...
I opened up to him today about how I believe I have depression again, and he said "I know you, and I know you can get through this again."
Unlike the tool I was dating the last time I dealt with it. When I opened up to him about it, he paid for dinner, walked me home, and avoided me until the end of the semester.

[princessmeg1328]

How do I know that I'll be with my boyfriend forever? It's easy. I look into his eyes and I feel like I'm home. The way I feel about him is a way I have never felt about anyone else. I want to share things with him. I want to have special experiences with just him. From the first day I met him, I knew I wanted to be with him. When I'm in his arms, I feel the safest and most secure I have ever felt with anyone. I know that with him, I can take on the world. I've never felt like that with anyone else. He makes me want to be a better person. I love him with my whole heart. His last trip here proved it to me. With him, I can do anything.

[ClipitsWings]

I was wondering...what type of things do you see from you SO that shows you that you will be with them forever, that you will get married. What are some hints they drop, or bluntly say, or actions that show you that they want to be with each other?

See, i don't exactly know what's going to happen, but i want him to be in my life as long as i can possibly keep him; i don't know how well i articulate it, but he's done some things (though for the most part the future isn't too big of a thing in our conversations)
~I was half asleep and we were talking about cuddling, he randomly made a comment about eloping, XD sure, all i said was "i don't see how you could do that while cuddling" but that he thought about it at all made me smile
~he took the initiative to plan a trip to see me without me saying a thing (and i can't wait <3)
~when i suggested the possibility of me studying abroad in brisbane, he said i could stay with him and claimed he would sleep on the couch haha (and that he'd spend most nights and the majority if not all weekends with me)
~he's always there to help me deal with my inner emo without getting exasperated and bailing haha
~he's said "one day, you'll wake up in my arms" and other sweet, optimistic tidbits
~he deals with my smartass responses and awkward round-about ways of talking about things XD crazy bastard thinks its cute haha
~my sweetheart is making me a stuffed animal its supposed to be a surprise, so he's just not going to tell me what it is of
~he accepts that i'm a straightedge prude and he's not pushing me towards anything that'll make me uncomfortable ( :P however...)
~he makes me laugh he's so ridiculously intelligent, and a million other things i love about him afar


i'm sorry your boyfriend does that, but keep your hpes up; things cme up and sometimes its hard to come through. everyone has done it at some point. everyone doubts, just make sure you're really sure before you act on them; no regrets. good luck