I've been dating mine for a year now and I still can't sleep next to mine either. Sounds like are parents are similar. I completely understand your frustration. (and I'm 21)
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Not to get on the wrong side of this forum post debate or anything, but I'd like to but in about paying and parents.
It doesn't matter if you have the money for one trip, you would have to be entirely financially independent, not owe them a cent, AND have bettered them in your career advancement before they act as you want them to act. Your parents sound like my parents, and I personally feel, based on my previous interactions with them. Why do I think this way? I personally have the money saved-over $3,000, to take a trip to my SO in China AND probably visit other surrounding countries. I also do have the time in my schedule. But I am not financially independent overall. So there is no chance for me to have my way until then.
And even still, it's possible that after I reach all of those things my parents will still be the same. I've heard stories of successful lawyers who thought that financial independence, a great and prestigious career, would earn them parental respect. They are treated the same by their strict asian parents at 30, 35, etc. One of which was my previous professor.
So I guess what I'm saying is this is just the hand you were dealt in life, as I was, and you'll have to make the best of it. But I understand you too...I really do. There have been many nights at the gym where I wanted to throw some dumbbells into the wall in frustration...
But on the even more frustrating other hand, when I throw up my hands in defeat and start being 120% obedient to the way they want me to act, suddenly they turn around and chastize me for being an obedient robot and not being mature enough to have my own thoughts. (what in the hell they want, i have no clue).Comment
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hmmmmComment
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Seems like this post has been getting alot of attentions by other posts but i thought i would tell yall the reason i closed this thread i asked for advice and almost everyone was amazing and i couldnt ask for better people and i thank you all but i was sadden by one person on here they made me feel worse about not only myself but my situation so i closed it because i did not want them to be able to put one more comment that was negative and that was not gonna help @ all, I asked for advice not a lecture if i wanted that i would talk to my parents. Call me immature i dont really care but when u feel personally attacked by a single person it changes the way you act, and feel about this entire forum and it makes me sad that there are people out there who treat people like that when someone legitimately is asking for advice not constructive criticism. Someones opinion that has not been in this or my situation is irrelevant and while all advice and comments are welcome. But i feel that b4 you give said opinion u need to think will this have negative effects of that person, I cried because of certain comments on this post and yes that sounds dumb but its the truth. Hope yall have an amazing day and God bless yall! And another thing if you dont feel that the thread is stupid or blah blah blah there is no need for a comment from you!Comment
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Should have said if you do feel that this thread or any other thread is stupid and its taking time outta your day to write a comment back then a comment is not neededOriginally posted by knhdarw View PostComment
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I'm in the same boat with my parents. They won't let me sleep with my BF and neither will his parents. Honestly, I live in their house so I understand it. It sucks but I'd rather have a place to live"We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love " ~ Theodore Seuss Geisel.Comment
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You do realize you not only have the option to ignore the user so that you don't see their posts at all, but that you can report their post if you feel they're being insulting or personally attacking you, right? Honestly, it's the internet, there's no need to get up in arms about what a stranger says to you. I would advise you use these tools given to you or just contact Michelle personally and explain your problem and it will be handled the right way.Originally posted by knhdarw View PostComment
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rugger me and you both id rather have a home, car and financial security then move out and live paycheck to paycheck if i didnt care to live that way i wouldnt b in a LDRComment
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So after all this stress and worry about not being able to sleep in my SO room, my parents sont want me with mt BF they think he's not really good enough for me and that he's not the one for me :"(Comment
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Originally posted by snow_girl View Post
This. Sucks, but that's the way it is. Arguing about it isn't going to do anything but create tension during a time that should be fun.Comment
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yea thats the least of my worry's not they met him and now they dont think he's good enough for me
and his parents want nothing to do with me
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Oh man.. this sounds like a really tough situation. And honestly, it pisses me off too. Unless your boyfriend has done something to deserve your parents' disapproval, like if he's not treating you right, they have no right to tell you who is and is not good enough for you. Can I ask what their reasons are for feeling this way?
I have to disagree a little with a lot of the people on here. You ARE an adult, you're over 18 and to me that's an adult. I'm European though, so I know I probably see things a little bit different than others on here. It's one thing that you can't sleep in the same bed as him, that you have to respect, since it's your parents' vacation/house or whatever. But the fact that you can't even be in the same room with him alone, with the doors open.. that's just silly. And to me it sounds like they have no trust. If I were you, I'd sit down with them, tell them that you feel they don't trust you at all, that they don't think you can make good decisions etc. Tell them that you feel really hurt by this. Don't attack them, just tell them how you feel about it. And also that you don't feel that it's their place to decide who you should be with, and that you boyfriend is good to you (if he is
) and makes you happy etc.. to me it seems like there is a lack of communication here and that things need to come out in the open about this.
Keep us posted about how things are going. I wish you all the best, must be such a hard situation you're both in right now. And even though you're not dating each others' parents, parents' opinions have a great impact on you, even if you don't want them to.Comment
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Parents are like that. I think its because they don't know him or your relationship that well yet. I think a lot of parents assume that if two young people sleep in the same bed they are going to have sex lol. When my dad always saw my bf and I holdhands and have our arms around eachother he gave me a speech on how I better not run off and get married at age 20. I was like ok... so since your on vacay with him just do whatever silly rules they have. After all sleeping will be just a small portion if your day. Enjoy the daytimetogetherComment
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Stina- they Dont think he's good enough for me because we want to different things outta life or so they say i'm in college majoring in pre-med and he works for the government been there since he was 19 has a year of college under his belt in computer science. they also feel that he's not handsome enough for me, and that he acts weird, and nerd the things that attracted me to him are the same things my parents despise i guess you could say. My sister also doesn't like the way he talks to me she says he's mean but honestly he freaked out because of his brand new Hat i thought it was funny and once we got alone i told him he needed to chill and quite being a A** that he wasnt gonna make a good impression on my family by acting so stupid and he apologized and we moved on. My parents didnt but other than that he did nothing wrong on our trip together for him to come see me and go on vaca with my family for 5 days he spent $900-1000 and i spent about $400 which is way more then my parents paid for the trip and their saying that he can not support me financially and that in the long run i'm not gonna be happy with him because were to different. My parents well my mom said i have grace and carry myself well but i told her i know who i have to do that with but when i;m with my friends or my SO i can let my hair down and truly be me. It sucks cause not only am i crying because he left on tuesday and i may not see him for 7 months but my parents are gonna make it hard and i'm banking on them trying to forbid me to be able to go to see him in december like ive been planning. and idk what i would do if that happened its hard enough for me to wait 3 months let alone 7 :"( prays are welcome cause this is a horrible time for me right now and there nothing i feel i can do i feel alone @ my house and the one person i wanna run to is 1000 miles awayComment
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