Saving/Archiving Instant Messages or Texts

[snow_girl]

I have a folder with all of our conversations saved and the time logs of our skype calls. I also copied all our emails to the folder. I know that when the times comes for a marriage visa we are going to need proof that we were together when we were not physically together. Its not exactly something I would want any sort of authority to read but I have to much I hope that they would just take one look at all I have a say its okay.

[Élan]

I purposely save all the emails he's sent me and occasionally read the old ones, but I don't like to read our old chat logs. I've saved the chat logs for immigration purposes ("proof of an ongoing relationship"), but that's the only reason. I'd rather read through emails that we'd written very purposefully than random chats where we may or may not have been busy, cranky or otherwise distracted. Does he mind if you save emails?

[knhdarw]

I save the messages that are special (make me smile, laugh or fall in love all over again) so this is perfectly normally and my BF saves messages from me too

[LadyMarchHare]

I don't disagree, but I was just making the point that if you say you've deleted them, then you should. For me, it would be a trust issue. I might think it's silly, and you might think it's silly, but for whatever reason, the OP's SO has an issue with it *shrugs*.

I wasn't contesting that as I do agree that if you've promised something you need to follow through. I was just sort of musing about why someone would find it uncomfortable to have conversations saved, even if some of the things you say are private.

[Moon]

I wasn't contesting that as I do agree that if you've promised something you need to follow through. I was just sort of musing about why someone would find it uncomfortable to have conversations saved, even if some of the things you say are private.

Yeah, kinda weird, huh? I mean, what's she gonna do, send them to the New York Times? To each his own, I guess

[Caitlin2009]

lol we use skype now, but when we used MSN alot heh i saved all the voice clips and all the messages, i have 2 and a half stacks of disks full of our convo's yeaaah kinda sad but im very sentimental and i dont wanna throw stuff like that away

[jencav]

I purposely save all the emails he's sent me and occasionally read the old ones, but I don't like to read our old chat logs. I've saved the chat logs for immigration purposes ("proof of an ongoing relationship"), but that's the only reason. I'd rather read through emails that we'd written very purposefully than random chats where we may or may not have been busy, cranky or otherwise distracted. Does he mind if you save emails?

no, he doesn't mind emails. he just thinks that the "chats" are more like conversations, and that it would be like recording a phone call. the funny thing is, my dad not too long ago realized that instant messenger archived his messages, and he had the same reaction! i am kinda thinking it's a "man" thing. lol

[jencav]

Yeah, kinda weird, huh? I mean, what's she gonna do, send them to the New York Times? To each his own, I guess

:-) you all are correct in your musing. i completely agree, and it makes me smile. thank you.

there is some complication in our situation, and he is also concerned about a permanent time line, and a very private person. although, as i commented to another post, he has not told me to delete our emails. when i agreed i wouldn't keep them, i asked him if i could keep the stories (we sometimes write little stories back and forth), and he said that i could keep those. when we use gmail, it is automatically "off the record" because he chose that, so i am in compliance there ;-). when we are on instant messenger, though, i still have my archiving on, and i have a hard time deleting them, and so i haven't. i don't necessarily go back and read them all the time, but, as many of you have said, i like to look back sometimes and read something sentimental that was said. especially during a time of no contact. i have told myself that if he ever makes it here, that i will delete them because i don't want him to know i did it anyway. i need them right now. once in awhile i have a moment of thinking "should i just stop and delete them?", but i'm afraid i'll regret it.

thanks for all the comments!

[jencav]

just another note, we do not email that much. we mostly instant message, so that is where our time together is.

also, once in awhile, in reading back, i might read something that causes me to think. so sometimes, i also wonder if it might not be such a good idea for me to be reading back and maybe "analyzing" something that was said, when he doesn't do that. he does have a point that when you are talking in conversation, all you have is your memory of it. i wouldn't say i have a problem or make issues out of anything, but i do think it's interesting to explore the question. does anyone else ever find themselves doing that?

[Sora1101]

I only save the texts that make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside ^^; and no matter how many times I re read them I get the same huge smile and the same butterflies.

[princessmeg1328]

I definitely keep the texts and e-mails that my SO sends me. We might need them one day for immigration purposes. I keep them for sentimental reasons too. He and I spend most of our time on Skype so the things that are written there don't really make sense after a while.

[kteire]

I didn't even think about the immigration thing a few people have mentioned - good to know!!
I keep all our IMs on skype automatically anyways, and while it might be silly, I still have my Irish cell phone. It has texts from when we were dating CD, and from when I was there visiting him a few months ago Sometimes when I get nostalgic, I turn it on and read back to when we first started dating and everything was so new and uncertain!