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In attempts of reassuring my SO, what does he need to hear?

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    #1

    In attempts of reassuring my SO, what does he need to hear?

    As some of you guys may know, I'm going through a very harsh time in my relationship. Biggest issue is that he is scared of the future and broadening our relationship to the next level (me relocating within the year). I hate how hesitant he is! But I suppose it really is just his nature to be doubtful and cautious about major things (like overly...). However this latest spat almost tore us apart. I'm a very aggressive person so I suppose i bombarded him with alot of stuff in it, they weren't inappropiate suggestions, just overwhelming. I know that he loves me with all of his heart and that he cares so much about my best interests, but now we are barely speaking.
    So next time we have the ability to talk, I'm trying to decided on what i want to say to him to help pacify his fears and doubts.
    Any input is appreciated
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    #2
    I hope you can talk soon!!! In my personal case it was never good to have long periods of no communication. I think when you talk next you should apologize for being aggressive with him and for whatever you think it was out of place. And let him know the reason why you reacted like that, out of fear or whatever. Then explain him how you feel about the future together, let him know you understand the consecuences of this and that you are willing to work on them in order for both of you be together. Everybody has to live, and life brings challenges, you will have to endure them either where you are right now or where you will be with him. Tell him how much you love him and appreciate him and how much you would like to spend the life with him. Best wishes girl!

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      #3
      He is scared of YOU relocating, at a distance of barely 400 miles? I would be aggressive too.
      I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
      - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



      "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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        #4
        By your profile it looks like you have been together almost 7 years and are looking to close a 400 mile distance. What is he finding so overwhelming about broadening your relationship? I could understand if you'd only been dating a few months and were moving cross-country and into his place. To me it would seem there is something much deeper going on with him and that's where you need to start.
        To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.

        ​Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.

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          #5
          The original post was done almost 5 years ago.....prob no longer relevant.

          Comment

            #6
            Originally posted by Unicorn26 View Post
            The original post was done almost 5 years ago.....prob no longer relevant.
            LOL - it showed up in my "new" thread. I didn't even check the date. Thanks!!
            To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.

            ​Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.

            Comment

              #7
              Originally posted by R&R View Post
              LOL - it showed up in my "new" thread. I didn't even check the date. Thanks!!
              No worries!!! I do daft stuff like this all the time. Must be our age hahaha!!!

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