His parents found out!

[kiara_silver]

Today Nathan wrote to me "i need to talk now"
Turns out his dad found out about us for the first time. No one in his family knew about us and that we been secretly dating for 2 years. well semi secretly. But anyways his dad is the only one who knows, he asked a few questions but not alot, and since then Nathan just went to his room and avoided talking. lol so now its all on my mind. I wonder what there thinking, what they think of me, and me and him and just so many thoughts. Nathan says to chill and not worry so im not panicking but its something to think about. Its already 3am there so hes long asleep now. But i wonder what there going to say tomorrow, if there going to want to talk to me, if there going to question or be upset with him, is this going to be a issue with him coming here. Just lots of questions.

Anyways my question to you guys is, did any of ur family ever find out about any of you without you telling them? Was it a surprise in any way or were u taken off guard? How did things go?

[Karringtyn]

How old are the two of you would be my first question....

Breathe is my advice. It will all be ok....just remember the love you two have..

[kiara_silver]

i'll be 19 on the 22nd, and he's 18, will be 19 in august we first got together right before our 17th b-days

yeah he kept telling me to chill out lol but i so want there approval

[snow_girl]

I know you've mentioned this before but how come he hasn't told his parents already?

[kiara_silver]

He isn't very close to them, he keeps to himself mostly, he likes to keep his private life private. His father works where he goes away for months at a time so he's never got the opportunity to really have a close relationship. So its hard for him to share things with anyone. He planned to tell them when he was here. But guess thats not going to happen now.

[snow_girl]

As long as he wasn't outright hiding it, I think its good he found out. I wouldn't worry too much, what's the worst that could happen from them knowing?

[kiara_silver]

Yeah, it just was a surprise, and it just happened a few hours ago. So its all on my mind. Nathan already payed for his ticket and is all booked and coming, and im not worried about us and our feelings. Im just.... idk nervous?

[kiara_silver]

Lol my Nathans so sweet and good to me, he came on and talked to me and reasurred me, just left its after 5am his time. lol was watching a movie so he was up already but he still came and checked on me, so i feel loved lol, whatever happens happens. Were not going to change our plans or feelings, so i feel better now.

[FadedSunrise]

Oh boy. I think you might know my story and all, since I've told it a few times, but mine found out. Before I was willing to tell them. And it drove a stake a mile wide between our relationship and changed the way I saw them. Basically, I forgot that I have no mail privacy at home, and stupidly told my boy to send a letter to my house. One day I was out, but the parents were home early, and they received the letter. So they proceeded to interrogate me on it. I could never take their pressure or disapproval, so eventually I cracked, and we argued for a week while I cried day and night and eventually decided to break up on their orders. Then I secretly got back together since 3 months 3 weeks ago, keeping all contact between me and him private. That was January, and since then he's come up in conversation about two times. Each time they talked of him they had such a snide and condescending tone towards him, just on the basis of his career and background, and because it is coming from my parents that I love to my boy that I love, it hurt so much that I just started living with the perpetual facade that I had moved on and was happy single. Better that then live in perpetual torment.

My boy's 25, and I'm 20. I live at home with parents, who pay for everything major, and he's been financially independent and on his own since graduating college about 4 yrs ago. He lives in China, I was born in China but moved here. We're actually from the same home province, and with how much my dad especially talks about the pride of hardworking Chinese farmers(my parents, and his parents, are both from farming families), but in the same breath looks down at my boy in disdain it just adds insult to injury.

[ClipitsWings]

that was sweet of him to reassure you i feel like you don't have much to worry about if he's determined not to be swayed Also not all parental reactions are bad, so you can keep your hopes up a bit about that. i ended up telling my mom about my boy after 2+ years and she happened to be relieved (=_= which actually came off a little offensive, but she mean it positively!)

i wish you luck

[Mara]

I didn't tell my parents about my first serious boyfriend. I will never go down the secretive route again. They did not take it well at all because at the time they found out about my boyfriend, he and I had been dating 2.5 years. It wasn't really in secret, but I wasn't open about it either. This made them take an immediate dislike to him. In your case though, if they didn't overreact when they found out I think you are good.

[BlueCat]

To me it seems like you'll be fine. The fact that his dad didn't yell at him and simply asked him a few questions, is a really positive sign. It shows that he's taking it seriously, whether he likes it or not, he's still thinking about the situation and what it means. I imagine he'll take some time to digest the answers to his questions, he may or may not mention it to his mum, but he probably realises that your hearts are set on it since it's been so long. So I imagine, the questioning was more from concern than anything. He probably is just taking time to adjust to the news and I'm sure will come to be fine with it.