Should I enter another LDR?

[luna_banana]

I was once in a LDR for 2 years but things weren’t working out and I broke up with him. Now I am dating another guy, close distance. We have been together for about 4.5 months but in August I go to college 6 hours away. He is still going to be in high school. Plus, he plans to go to a local college, which means that at best we’ll be in a LDR for FIVE years before we both finish college.
I definitely have experience handling a LDR from my last relationship. However, I don’t feel nearly as attached to this guy as I was to my old boyfriend when I had to move away from him. It’s hard for me to imagine a future with him. But I know he cares about me very much and he IS a good boyfriend. The worst part is that he is constantly worrying that I’m going to break up with him before I go to college. If I decide I don’t want to continue things he wants me to break up with him sooner rather than later. So here I am in limbo, wanting to make a decision but also wanting to put it of as much as possible.
I don’t want to lie to him just so he won’t worry, I don’t want to end our relationship right now when there’s still 2 months before we leave, and I don’t want him to be depressed all the time about something we can’t change. Has anyone gone through this sort of thing before? Do you have any advice to offer?

[melpie]

I guess i look at it as is it worth a shot to you? Do you think it's something that could possibly work out... is he someone you can see yourself with 5 years down the road? As you know LDR's are a lot of work but with the right person I think it is completely worth the time/effort and all the other hard stuff that you will have to deal with again. Would you regret not giving your relationship a chance? Just some things to think about... hope this helps!

[Sora1101]

I honestly don't think you should, if your feelings for him aren't that strong I would break up with him, going from one LDR to another in such a short amount of time could be a real strain on you emotionally, and going off to college you're going to be stressed enough as it is, I think you'd be better off living the single life for awhile or finding someone closer to your school. If you really like this guy though go for it, if you can see yourself being together then by all means, but just keep in mind that being in a LDR for 5 years with someone you can't see a future with wouldn't be the best idea.

[lucybelle]

Yeah I feel like the guy you're with now might be your rebound guy. It seems like you sort of like him, but probably just like him cuz he likes you. I'd let him go, stay single a while, and see what's out there. Good luck.

[uniquefem]

One thing should remember LDR or not LDR, do not fear to falling in Love again. Thats what made you a live anyway, with all the ups and downs.

Most of my relationship is LDR. I had one not LDR too, when its not work it wont. Should check your self if you really want this or this is just a rebound from your previous relationship. Careful with expectations, or hopes.. just see if you really want this again, when you sure about this, and you want this relationship, then pour your self in to it.

We can't choose to whom we falling in love and how the relationship will be

[bluishskin]

Whether or not to go on another LDR, that's entirely up to you. You were there before so you know how it feels. I have to agree with Sora that if you don't feel that attached to this guy nor see yourself with him in the future, then best to end it as soon as possible to avoid wasting time and energy. Or, you could try to keep it going until you are on LDR, and see how you think and feel about him and everything that's involved in your relationship. He has the point though, it's almost like "quickly put me out of this misery if you don't like it anymore". Most importantly, what is it that you actually want? Personally if I were I would try not to worry too much as you are still young and you have heaps of things ahead of you. Try to keep it simple and enjoy life (including being single)!
Whatever you choose, I hope it's the best for you. Cheers!

[Silviar]

I'd base it on whether you want to continue the relationship or not. You can always give it a try and then break up if it doesn't work for you.

[churchgrim]

I've never been through anything like this, but I'll share my view, in case it helps any.

In my opinion, never view a relationship as a LDR.
I say this because it's not about the distance (though of course it impacts it), but because it's first and foremost about the relationship.
You say you don't see a future with him, so I'd say no, don't carry on in the relationship because if you do and then you move away, he's going to be much more stressed with the distance, and you (most likely) breaking things off down the road. It's easier to get it out of the way now if you honestly don't see anything happening with him.
I know you say you dont want to break up with him now with two months to go, but you holding off until he leaves with make it harder to break up when the time comes, and it will give him hope that you won't end things! Plus imagine being broken up with just as your SO goes to leave. It would be way tougher than hearing the news sooner.

Of course, all this is simply my opinion, but I do think it's for the best.
Good luck!