Anyone's SO NOT romantic?

[CloseToMyHeart]

Ok, my SO is awesome and I love being with him, but he has to be the most unromantic person I know.... lol...

I hold dear to me all the "little things", like our first date, and where we met, and the day we met, our first motel (asked them to let me keep the room key.... lol )..... I like to do little things to remember but to him they don't mean much ..

I figured after not being together for awhile that just maybe he would give me even a single flower, or plan something special while we were together, but no ... his idea of romance is that he took a day off work for me, paid for dinners and movies, and cuddles with me when he's here.....

Anyone else not have a romantic SO? If so how do you deal with it, and be romantic without being annoying and seeming like your obsessed

[iamangel]

Me and my SO are romantic in a different way... Like you and your SO. He has his own idea on how to be romantic like what you said """ his idea; of romance is that he took a day off work for me, paid for dinners and movies, and cuddles with me when he's here....."""" Just try to understand and appreciate him. Because I'm sure he appreciate you too.

[Junebug]

I completely understand. My SO is loving and caring and everything you want in a man. When we are together we go out to dinner and cuddle at the house or even cook supper together and watch a movie and hang out. He has never once given me a card, flower, etc. I deal with this as being the fact that he just isn't that type of guy. He shows his love with time that he spends with me and the time talking we spend talking on the phone every night. I would find out what his Love Language is and then learn about it. It will help tremendously in your relationship. I will tell you this, my SO and I have different Love Languages but they work well together.

[Moon]

*Raises hand* Mine! My sweet, wonderful boyfriend is as romantic as a turnip Part of it's cultural, and part is just how he is, but after two years, I'm used to him. While he may not do those traditionally romantic things, he has his own ways that are more subtle, but definitely more substantial. Look for those small things that really matter, and appreciate them, since some guys will just never do those traditional ones. I might not get flowers, but I always have fidelity, ya know? You can talk to him though and see if he has any clue whatsoever, and maybe you can guide him a little bit to what you want. Good luck!

[jennten]

Mine isn't very romantic... He doesn't really think to do things like send me things or get me flowers, while I am always looking for little things to give him or randomly texting him that I love him (to his credit, he does that sometimes too). I kinda complained about it once to him and he felt so bad that he nearly drove himself crazy trying to think of something to do for me during the time that we're LD. But honestly, his brain just doesn't work that way. Fortunately, he does other things like if he comes to my dorm and sees dishes everywhere, he'll just pick them up and wash them. Then once when my stomach was hurting, he showed up at my dorm with a bottle of pepto bismol and a fizzy drink. I've learned to appreciate these little things as him showing that he cares for me and I'm getting to the point where I don't miss grand romantic gestures. He's a total sweetheart and so very good to me.

I might not get flowers, but I always have fidelity, ya know?

Exactly this!

[Micah]

My SO isn't very romantic, but that's okay. I don't try to change him because that's just how he is. There were many times I wish he'd make some romantic gesture, but then I just accepted that just because I am romantic doesn't mean he has to be. He is a protector, likes to provide, is extremely helpful, and he is very caring, so I guess that makes up for not being romantic.

[CloseToMyHeart]

Thanks everyone, I am so glad I'm not alone. I truly think the most romantic thing he does is the fact that when we are apart, he's not with anyone else. Even if he only "cares" for me (I was excited to even hear that), he respects me enough to only be with me. I thought one of the sweetest things he did was actually take time off work after less then a month together just to spend more time with me (he missed fathers day with his dad though....oops).

[uniquefem]

Well... i honestly laugh hard when reading this. My SO... not romantic.. and he drive me crazy because of that, because he had different ideas of being romantic, and ..somehow thats what i like about him!

He is the guy who met me after 7 months not see each other and gave me: a white mug said "UBUNTU". Yepp.. after 13hours flights and 2 hours TGV train, he gave me a software mug. But seeing his face like a lighthouse like it was a treasure, i cant do anything but jump at him and kiss him and say thank you.

When we stop for a coffee after long autobahn ride, i see the cafe like romantic 60es place, so i decide to take a sephia picture, while we doing our rest. And i think its romantic, and i just found out that he point one of his finger to the camera.. errhhh i pull his ears.

When we are at this romantic castle ruins, theres couple kissing each other passionately, i look at him, grinning (short of saying heyy i want those!!) you know what his lines? "bastard!"(with Russian accent) i was like omg! hahaha! if you want it, do it then!! (which i did, i jump at him!)

His idea of making me "interested" and idea of cuddling is, to tickle me to the point that i almost cry.

I hate all of this, i envy to other girls, but if you want to trade these memories.. haha i wont.. this is who he is, and i love him just the way he was... and yes, if there is another girl passes with short skirt.. he didn't look at hahaha! he is very faithful, and i think this is extremely romantic!!

[13000km]

I'm the non romantic one. I try to keep sentimental stuff but always end up losing them or forgetting about them. I have a very selective memory and for some reason tend to not remember stuff he does. I never know what to get him as gifts and need him to tell me specifically what he wants. I would never be able to plan a surprise for him because I talk too much. I do feel bad about it. But, he doesn't care. He has all his romantic gestures, gifts and surprises and most definitely don't find them annoying at all. I'm sure your SO enjoys all your romantic gestures, don't stop!

[milaya]

My SO and I have this kind of intern joke, that if you look up "unromantic" on wiki, his picture will show up.
I didn't even get a nice proposal when we got engaged and the day we signed our wedding papers he had nothing planned at all.

But... I don't mind that much, since he's the nicest guy I know and he is ready to give/buy and do anything for me, so I'm content. And, when he came to visit me last month, I had made him a list of things to buy me from Japan (food/snacks) and he had actually included many things I didn't ask for - just because he either thought of me (books and etc.) or knew that I liked it (snacks). Which is a big step since he used to only buy the things I said I wanted.

[Rugger]

My SO is like this too. He's not very romantic, but I've learned not to mind. There is no use making yourself unhappy with things that you are "missing" when you have so many other things to be happy about

[bluishskin]

Ah yes, my SO is not that romantic either but I def don't mind. Like you, I tend to remember small things such as the date of his first visit, the date of our first kiss, when he first added me on his Facebook and heaps of other stuff...but nuh-uh, he doesn't remember any of those unless I remind him. I haven't got any single flower from him which is also ok, but I really appreciate all the small things he has done for me, such as cooking me lunch when I was sick, calling me when I was hospitalised, accompanying to go to the doc and others. He's even bad at remembering birthdays, even birthdays of members of his family! I suppose that's partly cultural, partly because his mind just doesn't work that way. Thank goodness he remembers my birthday though, lol! It might irk me when I think he's not being romantic, but oh what the heck...as long as he's loyal to me then that's all that matters. Yup, Moon, I agree with ya!
So yeah, I deal with it pretty well.

[kteire]

My SO is not very romantic either. It used to bug me a bit when we were first dating, because he's a very logical person. When we go out for dinner, he figures out exactly how much each of us owe (down to the very last penny!). He doesn't make any sort of big gestures, and unless he's a bit drunk, he gets super awkward if I try to take a picture of the two of us! And he's definitely the sort of person that would think taking a day off work to spend with me is a big, romantic gesture, haha.
I've learned that with him, while he's not a typical romantic, he does things that are romantic in his own way, without realising it. When I was sick and really wanted pepto bismol, he ran around at 11-12pm checking every open pharmacy to see if he could find it! I thought that was incredibly sweet, but he'd never have thought that was romantic at all, lol.

[Tabitha]

My SO isn't very romantic, but neither am I, so it's ok.

[Silencedsongs]

It's sort of funny. My guy is the romantic one, and I'm sort of like - "Eh, don't buy me flowers. They just die. No, don't buy me that - that's a waste of money."

Soooo, what does he do? He'll buy little things that we both like. As we both like the Spawn comics, and I have an odd love for pirates - he bought me a Pirate Spawn that was given to me on his visit. ^.^; I really don't collect things like that, but it was thoughtful and cute on his part. Although, I don't really want to be given anything, all I need is him. He sometimes wishes I was a little more romantic, but he loves the way I show him that I care in my own way.