Injured but he is not doing anything....

[Carmen]

Hi guys just want to have some comments or advises....

I and my boyfriend just started a long distance relationship for 3 months. Things are fine so far as we will always talk on the phone.

Yesterday I got injured on my knee and ankle (because i fall down). On my way back I call my bf that I was injured and on my way back home. He said he had just finished his dinner with friends and he is going back soon. He will call me when he is back.

Ok, so I went back home, showered and wait for him to call back. Till 11:30pm I was too tired and text him asking him where he is. He called and tells me that his friend wants to have another round before going back. So he has no choice to follow.

I was very upset that he could have just text me or give me a call when he decides to stay out longer. Instead, he wait until i text him, then he claim that he is just going to call me.

Am I just being unreasonable or what? I was injured, in pain and i have to wait for him. If he so concern. He could have just called me or text me if he cannot make it on time.

What say you?

[Lina]

Simple way around it is to talk with your SO about how uncomfortable the whole thing made you feel. It's true that if he was worried for you, he would've called sooner or text you, but on the other hand you know how time flies and how easily you can lose the notion of time when you're along with others. Of course, this doesn't make less bothering that he kept enjoying himself while you were waiting for his call and needed to talk to him.

[Joyce:)]

You're not being unreasonable and quite frankly the way he acted was really mean, in my opinion. Or he just didn't think things through, Even when you are long distance, a good partner worries about you, asks you how you are feeling, sends text if he can't check on you otherwise. Tell him this bothered you

[Mara]

I would just talk to him about it. Don't be accusatory or place blame on him, just tell him that you would really have loved to talk to him and that you were waiting up on him. Tell him that if he is going to stay later than what the two of you talked about it's fine, just let you know so you won't be sitting up waiting on him.

[meg]

I'm on the other side, I'm afraid. Sure, he should have called you back, but if he's out with his mates then he's busy. He'll call you later, or the next day. If he wants to stay out later, he's allowed to.
You weren't seriously injured, not in hospital, so he probably didn't make the connection between you hurting yourself and needing the call. He probably thought you were fine, just a graze or a bruise.

[meg]

I'm on the other side, I'm afraid. Sure, he should have called you back, but if he's out with his mates then he's busy. He'll call you later, or the next day. If he wants to stay out later, he's allowed to.
You weren't seriously injured, not in hospital, so he probably didn't make the connection between you hurting yourself and needing the call. He probably thought you were fine, just a graze or a bruise.

[snow_girl]

I'm on the other side, I'm afraid. Sure, he should have called you back, but if he's out with his mates then he's busy. He'll call you later, or the next day. If he wants to stay out later, he's allowed to.
You weren't seriously injured, not in hospital, so he probably didn't make the connection between you hurting yourself and needing the call. He probably thought you were fine, just a graze or a bruise.

I agree. Yes maybe you were in pain but it wasn't really serious enough that he should have had to drop everything he was doing to baby you over it.

[Petals]

He certainly didn't have to leave his friends at that point, BUT a phone call or text just to check on her and indicate that he'll be staying out longer is not unreasonable to expect. OP, just tell him how disappointed you felt, when you didn't receive a phone call or text at that time. Set the tone of such things from early so he understands your expectations, because maybe he just didn't think about how his actions would affect you at the time.

[Carmen]

Thanks guys.....really appreciate your comments….
Things are fine when I really talk to him on the phone about how I felt. He apologize (for many time: D) . we are ok now….
But I’m just wondering, is this because of the way we communicate wrong? Or is it because of me? It seems to be like a routine when we argue….
I din talk about it-> I got upset-> he apologize-> I calm down-> we both happy
There are also times when I’m still upset, the results will be…
I got upset-> he apologize-> I’m still upset-> he got frustrated-> he got upset->I have to calm down-> we talk about it-> we both happy
I’m just wondering, is this healthy? Or is there any ways to improve our communication?

Thanks

[Hollis]

Perhaps you should let him know how he's making you feel the moment it's occurring instead of getting upset.

It's hard for a guy to have to constantly be glued to his phone.