How do you get through tough times in LDR?

[avalyn10.08]

Hello everyone,

Im struggling in my LDR. We are hoping to close the distance within the next couple of months and finally move in together . He is very busy with military work and we can’t talk much for the next few weeks. Its been so long since we last spoke and seen each other. Im having a hard time with missing him and feeling hope for our relationship.

how do you all get through tough times in LDR when you cannot talk to your loved one? I miss him so much and I worry during times we cannot speak that he forgets about me… as silly as that may sound

any advice helps! Thanks so much LDR community

[OhioJim]

I'm sorry, but I can't give you any advice.

My SO and I are going through tough times right now ourselves, and I would also like to know how to deal with it.
I just wanted you to know that you are not the only one having problems.

[avalyn10.08]

Thanks for the response! I appreciate it. I think it helps a lot
to hear I’m not alone. I know it’ll be worth it in the end as he and I are meant to be. It is just hard at times.

feel free to message me or talk more about your situation if you need support, it’d be happy to offer that

[yohcurlyhair]

Hello everyone, I am currently in a 6mos ldr and as for now I am struggling of taking care to my bf and also to our relationship. He's keep on telling me that I did not care for him and for his feelings at all, but I actually care for him. Right now, in our state i really dont know what to do and i am having a hard time coax him, Please help me on what to do because i cant help myself seeing him feeling tired and sad with my hand. thank you in advance for your advice!

[avalyn10.08]

Hello everyone, I am currently in a 6mos ldr and as for now I am struggling of taking care to my bf and also to our relationship. He's keep on telling me that I did not care for him and for his feelings at all, but I actually care for him. Right now, in our state i really dont know what to do and i am having a hard time coax him, Please help me on what to do because i cant help myself seeing him feeling tired and sad with my hand. thank you in advance for your advice!

Hi yohcurlyhair,

Sorry your having a hard time in ldr. How often do you see or talk to your bf? Maybe the next time you see or talk to him you can ask him what would help him see how much you care about him. I think we can forget about love languages. Also maybe he is generally feeling down and having troubles seeing that you care. I can relate to that in my ldr.

[yohcurlyhair]

hello avalyn,

we actually talk and face time everyday and we're actually fine when we're talking, but when he got drunk or he got upset unexpectedly he tend to tell me that his ex is much more caring than me. i already asked him on what can i do for him and he just replied that i dont need to ask him about that because he thinks that i know what to do when he's having a hard time in his work and in his everyday life. i feel hurt because i think that i am not enough being his girlfriend, being in his side. pls help mo on what am i going to do because i love him so much because he is the only man who accecpted my past and my flaws. pls help me thank you so much.

[avalyn10.08]

That sounds really difficult. I’m sorry you are dealing with this. I don’t really know how to help other than to suggest that you have a talk with your bf about this and let him know how much it is affecting you because it sounds like it is really taking a toll on you and your self esteem. It also sounds really unhealthy and it isn’t really the best or okay for him to be comparing you to past relationships even if he is upset, that would be very hurtful for anyone to hear, I think. If your bf is having such a hard time with things right now maybe it would be helpful to suggest that he talks to someone as he may be experiencing low mood and there is nothing wrong with needing someone to talk to so that it isn’t affecting your relationship as much.

You should also know that you are enough even if you are not his gf, even though it may not feel that way! ❤️

Hope that helps!

[Lausss]

Hello Avalyn

I understand how you are feeling, because I’m going through the same right now. My bf is also in the military and so it is difficult to communicate and even when we find more time there is a lot he has to leave unsaid.
We will meet in 2 months, which is not a long time but still I fear the same things you do.
what I do is trying to make myself busy, go out and exercise. Nights are the worst moments, sometimes crying a little makes me feel better. I also tell him when I’m feeling more down or hesitant than usual, even if he doesn’t reply in the same day.
and of course remind yourself that when this phase is over you’ll be happy together, having hope and a goal is the best advise.
Unlike me, you are close to closing the distance, plan it! Fantasise ! And don’t overthink your bf commitment, I’m sure he is 100% into you, that’s how military men are. Of course he remembers you, and he thinks of you as much as you think of him.
good luck!