Am I too Young?

[Bobbiejeanne]

Recently I've been getting a lot of flack for wanting to stay with my SO even though I'm moving away. Mostly comments like "You don't know what you want" and "College will change you" and "You know you'll find someone better at College".
Now, up until this point, I haven't let it bug me... but now it's starting to chip away at me a little.
I love him, I really do, and I couldn't imagine being with anyone else

People in College LDRs: Is it really THAT hard?
Everyone Else: Are we too young? What is your honest opinion of College LDRs?

Thanks guys for listening, it's been REALLY getting to me

[Sora1101]

Well all I can say is if you know you want to be with your SO then it shouldn't be that hard to stay with him, because you'll be willing to work hard for who you want to be with. I don't think you're too young, I started dating my SO when I was 15 and now we have been together for almost 2 years, it's just a matter of growing WITH your partner not away from them.

[Darth_Taco]

While it wasn't due to college, I began my long distance relationship with my boyfriend when we were 18. Maintaining this type of relationship is hard enough for two young people. Add in the fact that we're fickle and I'm a recovering drug addict and you got yourself a disaster :P. I got sober, we ignored all the naysayers and just continued on with the relationship. We're 21 now and we're going good. Some people on his side are still being asses, but that's mostly the gay thing since we're not long distance anymore. Kinda funny they were more ok with long distance xD. What can I say? Homophobia will always be stronger than the fear of technology :P.

Now, none of this is me giving your a guarantee that your relationship will work out or that this will even be easy. This will probably be one of the hardest things you will ever do. You will have times of weakness, days where the loneliness seems almost unbearable. Just remember, if this relationship is working, it will get better. That doesn't mean you can't go seeking help through these tough times though, it's actually recommended :P. Best to talk with people that know what you're feeling and your loved one. You'll be surprised how much some hard work (or lovin), a positive attitude, and some encouragement from random people on the internet will help get you through this.

[snow_girl]

I think college is hard on LDRs for a lot of reasons. You go into it saying nothing will change, until you get invited to a party and your SO gets jealous. You want to hang out with new friends, and you feel bad that your missing out on this stuff with your SO. You see all these guys and girls at school holding hands, theres a really cute guy in one of your classes that shows some interest in you, you wonder what it would be like to date someone closer to you.
As long as you both trust each other 100% and can work though each situation that arrises you will be okay.

[pbdude200]

At times it will be hard but just keep your head up and don't let the naysayers get to you and that will help a lot

[Dziubka]

LDRs are always hard.
It doesn't matter whether you work, go to school, university or whatever. You can always meet someone who lives in your city. Someone who's cute, fun and if you weren't in a relationship, you'd totally want to go on a date with them.
It can be your new class- or workmate, your friend's cousin who has recently moved to the city, whoever.
And I think everyone who's in a LDR has at some point thought how much easier it would be to date someone closer.

What makes being in a LDR during college/uni harder, is two things.
First of all you've most likely just moved out of your parents' and you're surrounded by people who're living in their own for the first time. Everyone enjoys their freedom to do whatever they want, come home when they want, go out with who they want, drink how much they want and so on. In a LDR you give up part of that freedom and I can guarantee you, that a lot of people won't understand that.
My boyfriend and I actually encourage each other to go out, but sometimes I still catch myself wanting to get home earlier from cocktails with friends so I can talk to my boyfriend before he goes to sleep.

Secondly and this might be connected with the first reason, you're meeting a lot of new people almost every day. I don't know what it's like after uni, you probably still meet new people but during college there's new classmates, neighbours, your neighbours' friends that they bring to a party, your new workmates if you're working,...
Obviously the more people, you might, they more likely it becomes that you meet someone you'll like or develop a crush on.

It's definitely not impossible and I think it would be silly to break up simply because it might be hard. If it's meant to be and there's no one better for you than your SO, then go for it. You'll never know if you don't try.
But at the same time, try to enjoy college as much as you can anyway. If you're going to stay at home talking to your SO on Skype, while your friends are out having a blast, you'll most likely end up resenting him for it.

[Rugger]

LDRs are always hard.
It doesn't matter whether you work, go to school, university or whatever. You can always meet someone who lives in your city. Someone who's cute, fun and if you weren't in a relationship, you'd totally want to go on a date with them.
It can be your new class- or workmate, your friend's cousin who has recently moved to the city, whoever.
And I think everyone who's in a LDR has at some point thought how much easier it would be to date someone closer.

What makes being in a LDR during college/uni harder, is two things.
First of all you've most likely just moved out of your parents' and you're surrounded by people who're living in their own for the first time. Everyone enjoys their freedom to do whatever they want, come home when they want, go out with who they want, drink how much they want and so on. In a LDR you give up part of that freedom and I can guarantee you, that a lot of people won't understand that.
My boyfriend and I actually encourage each other to go out, but sometimes I still catch myself wanting to get home earlier from cocktails with friends so I can talk to my boyfriend before he goes to sleep.

Secondly and this might be connected with the first reason, you're meeting a lot of new people almost every day. I don't know what it's like after uni, you probably still meet new people but during college there's new classmates, neighbours, your neighbours' friends that they bring to a party, your new workmates if you're working,...
Obviously the more people, you might, they more likely it becomes that you meet someone you'll like or develop a crush on.

It's definitely not impossible and I think it would be silly to break up simply because it might be hard. If it's meant to be and there's no one better for you than your SO, then go for it. You'll never know if you don't try.
But at the same time, try to enjoy college as much as you can anyway. If you're going to stay at home talking to your SO on Skype, while your friends are out having a blast, you'll most likely end up resenting him for it.

this. LDRs are hard regardless of where you are.

You need to live your life in college. Don't miss things because of him because as DZiubka said, you'll resent him for making you miss these exciting oppertunities. Another biggie in an LDR is trust. The both of you have to trust each other because you are going to be meeting a ton of new people in college and spending time with them. If there is no trust there is no relationship

---------- Post added at 07:30 AM ---------- Previous post was at 07:30 AM ----------

LDRs are always hard.
It doesn't matter whether you work, go to school, university or whatever. You can always meet someone who lives in your city. Someone who's cute, fun and if you weren't in a relationship, you'd totally want to go on a date with them.
It can be your new class- or workmate, your friend's cousin who has recently moved to the city, whoever.
And I think everyone who's in a LDR has at some point thought how much easier it would be to date someone closer.

What makes being in a LDR during college/uni harder, is two things.
First of all you've most likely just moved out of your parents' and you're surrounded by people who're living in their own for the first time. Everyone enjoys their freedom to do whatever they want, come home when they want, go out with who they want, drink how much they want and so on. In a LDR you give up part of that freedom and I can guarantee you, that a lot of people won't understand that.
My boyfriend and I actually encourage each other to go out, but sometimes I still catch myself wanting to get home earlier from cocktails with friends so I can talk to my boyfriend before he goes to sleep.

Secondly and this might be connected with the first reason, you're meeting a lot of new people almost every day. I don't know what it's like after uni, you probably still meet new people but during college there's new classmates, neighbours, your neighbours' friends that they bring to a party, your new workmates if you're working,...
Obviously the more people, you might, they more likely it becomes that you meet someone you'll like or develop a crush on.

It's definitely not impossible and I think it would be silly to break up simply because it might be hard. If it's meant to be and there's no one better for you than your SO, then go for it. You'll never know if you don't try.
But at the same time, try to enjoy college as much as you can anyway. If you're going to stay at home talking to your SO on Skype, while your friends are out having a blast, you'll most likely end up resenting him for it.

this. LDRs are hard regardless of where you are.

You need to live your life in college. Don't miss things because of him because as DZiubka said, you'll resent him for making you miss these exciting oppertunities. Another biggie in an LDR is trust. The both of you have to trust each other because you are going to be meeting a ton of new people in college and spending time with them. If there is no trust there is no relationship

[Lina]

Wherever you are and whatever it is that you're doing, as long as you want to be with your SO and you love him then nothing changes. Regardless of how many new persons you meet or the place where you move to, the only things which can influence your relationship are your own principles, your perspective on things. Many of us get negative comments about our LDR even if it's not a college LDR, cause that's how people are -they consider this type of relationships hopeless or meaningless. Just stick to your wishes and your feelings and don't let the comments of others to get to you.

[Yaaamiii]

LDRs are always hard.
What makes being in a LDR during college/uni harder, is two things.
First of all you've most likely just moved out of your parents' and you're surrounded by people who're living in their own for the first time. Everyone enjoys their freedom to do whatever they want, come home when they want, go out with who they want, drink how much they want and so on. In a LDR you give up part of that freedom and I can guarantee you, that a lot of people won't understand that.
My boyfriend and I actually encourage each other to go out, but sometimes I still catch myself wanting to get home earlier from cocktails with friends so I can talk to my boyfriend before he goes to sleep.

This

I started out my LDR because he went away to college, and believe me it was probably one of the most difficult things I ever went through. I can't even begin to describe the emotions I felt. Its hard because both of us had classes at different times and on different days. Then he wanted to hang out with his friends at night. Can't say I don't blame him, but it put one hell of a strain on our relationship. But it IS possible, we're still still together, we're both going into our junior year at two separate colleges and I can only tell you that it takes a lot of time and patience because schedules need to be figured out. It'll be rough at first, you'll be trying to get accustomed to a new environment with new people and you'll be living on your own. You're probably gonna wanna try new experiences (not saying they'll be bad ones) because these 4 years would be the time to do it.

Remember, it takes patience. Don't be afraid to tell your friends every now and then that you can't hang out with them because you wanna talk to your boyfriend. You'll actually be really surprised at all the people you meet who are in your same shoes. Best of luck! PM me if you have anymore questions, believe me I've been through what you're going through, and have gotten those exact comments. :P

[Tobby]

I'm only 14 and in a LDR with my SO. I hear alot of negativity towards me and her but i KNOW she's the one i want to be with. We're going to prove everyone wrong and show them that we can handle this situation until we can do things on our own. Since the school system is different in America than in the Philippines. I'll be starting Sophomore year while she graduates High school and starts College. Don't let anyone mess your feelings! its you who's in love, not them. Keep the Faith, and i agree with the others as well, TRUST each other, You know you love him, and you also know he loves you, so whats there to worry about?

[HollzHeartsChris]

What I would say is, don't listen to all the negative things that people say to you that may cause you to have any doubts in your LDR. I used to get a lot of it from people at school, but the reason why is because they can't understand what it's like to be in an LDR, when you've met the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. They can't comprehend what it's like to love someone so deeply, it doesn't matter how far away you are from your SO, but you still keep your relationship going strong. And as a lot of other people on this thread have said, it doesn't matter really as long as you love your SO and you trust each other You have the strength to be in an LDR, you have the strength to overcome what people may say.
I'm going to university in less than a month and in a week and he'll be starting school again in less than a week now. Don't let people put doubts into your mind about your relationship, because you have nothing to worry about when you know your SO loves you

[bluishskin]

LDRs are always hard.
It doesn't matter whether you work, go to school, university or whatever. You can always meet someone who lives in your city. Someone who's cute, fun and if you weren't in a relationship, you'd totally want to go on a date with them.
It can be your new class- or workmate, your friend's cousin who has recently moved to the city, whoever.
And I think everyone who's in a LDR has at some point thought how much easier it would be to date someone closer.

What makes being in a LDR during college/uni harder, is two things.
First of all you've most likely just moved out of your parents' and you're surrounded by people who're living in their own for the first time. Everyone enjoys their freedom to do whatever they want, come home when they want, go out with who they want, drink how much they want and so on. In a LDR you give up part of that freedom and I can guarantee you, that a lot of people won't understand that.
My boyfriend and I actually encourage each other to go out, but sometimes I still catch myself wanting to get home earlier from cocktails with friends so I can talk to my boyfriend before he goes to sleep.

Secondly and this might be connected with the first reason, you're meeting a lot of new people almost every day. I don't know what it's like after uni, you probably still meet new people but during college there's new classmates, neighbours, your neighbours' friends that they bring to a party, your new workmates if you're working,...
Obviously the more people, you might, they more likely it becomes that you meet someone you'll like or develop a crush on.

It's definitely not impossible and I think it would be silly to break up simply because it might be hard. If it's meant to be and there's no one better for you than your SO, then go for it. You'll never know if you don't try.
But at the same time, try to enjoy college as much as you can anyway. If you're going to stay at home talking to your SO on Skype, while your friends are out having a blast, you'll most likely end up resenting him for it.

Well said. I agree with all this.