Angry at him... for nothing?

[Yei&Jon]

Ok, so apparently my Jon and I hit the dull part on out LDR...again (something that's been happening a lot recently), and it seems that everytime this happens, I just snap at him for any little comments he makes. Like last night for instance, I felt really sad out of nowhere and typed "I need you baby", and he immediately thought I meant it suggestively and replied in that manner. I flew off the handle which lead us to argue/not talk for the rest of the night. I went to sleep early and apparently that made it worse cause I left him alone after I hurt him and "lied to him", something that I found out a bit later when I woke up cause he called me and I didn't remember what we talked about on the phone (I was half asleep when he called and I wasn't exactly paying attention) so I wanted to know. He refused to elaborate on what I lied to him about so I just said good night and went back to sleep (I don't like to nag about anything, just makes me angrier).

So, I wake up today and start thinking; It's been 1 year and 7 months as of tomorrow that we've been in this relationship and my quetion is, could all this be happening cause I'm just tired of this LDR and want it to be a CDR already? I mean, I have to admit that a CDR with him scares me sometimes just for the fact that he's 5 years younger and our mind set it's on a different level for a lot of things but, isn't getting over our fears it's what makes us happy? I feel like I'm ready for it but I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

What do you guys think? And how many of you can relate to this situation?

[Caitlin2009]

I had that last night actually :/ it doesnt happen all that often, in fact it happens like every couple of months or so me or her or both of us will have a meldown and lash out at each other, and i think its because we miss them so much because there not in the same room as us, so any little thing sets us off! In my case i have to wait for her to be approved to move to the US, and that takes 6 months to 2 years, and even with knowing shes gonna be visiting in a few months doesnt make the pain any less cause i want her here now! But something like this passes it always does, least in my situation

[Yei&Jon]

I agree, it is because I just want to be close and embrace him in my arms and I just hate not knowing when I'll see him next. The uncertainty of the outcome just kills and makes me bitter in a way even when he's not at fault. :/

[xsomanymilesx]

i can relate to this situation, the part where your saying that you sometimes snap at him for little things. i did the exact same thing last night. it was around 5am and because i have 2 weeks off at easter, and ive just come back from a holiday in london i decided to do an all nighter, we do them when we can because we feel that having long periods of time of us talking makes us feel closer to oneanother, anyway he said to me ' you must be tired now, do you want to go to bed' or something along those lines, and i know that he didnt mean it in a bad way, he was just concerned because he is 5 hours behind me and doesnt want me to be sleeping all day the next day and waste my day... but really.. what choice do i have? i took it in the way that he didnt care about talking to me as much as i did, and didnt appriciate me staying up for him, i told him that of course i was tired, i was ALWAYS tried... but it didnt matter because i was talking to him.
i went a bit crazy for a while, i knew i was being irrational but then i opened up to him about what i was not happy with; school, social life ect and it helped me see that it wasnt him i was mad at, it was things going on in my life and all the stress and pressue, and i was just taking it out on him... maybe there is something else bugging you not just something to do with your boyfriend... thats making you snap at him more? idk its just a suggestion
+ as for the going from LDR to CDR, that too has its ups and downs, i have yet to deal with that yet, i hope you feel better soon xx

[Yei&Jon]

Hehe, I too have had those "He wanting me to go to bed" snaps which, as you mentioned, have been cause of stress and pressures. Mostly from school on my part, and the confusion wether if I'll work or not as what I'm studying for. As for the family problems, well, those are always there..

[xsomanymilesx]

hmmm. thats pretty much the same stressful conversation we had last night, about me not wanting to do a levels and university, that would mean another 7 years of school, i want to do a diploma in travel and work in an airport, sad i know. but its what i want to do loll. i think.. im not sure, i dont know whats for the best in the long run anymore! and the fact my family dont know about him, theres the worry that the'll be a big fight about that too... i hope you feel better soon x

[lunamea]

I overreact frequently, too, and so does my husband. I think LD intensifies issues that are easier to deal with in person. It's just easier to misunderstand and harder to make up again when all you have is webcam, phone or text. Then there are other issues that are more brushed aside in an LDR that are unnerving when living together (daily problems: who does grocery shopping, who cooks, do we go out or not and who pays etc...). I'd still choose CDR over LDR any day, but there's problems and fights no matter if you live together/in the same town or far apart.

[So_Far_Away]

My bf is constantly telling me I should go to bed now... Sometimes I take it in the way it's meant, but more often than not, I fly off the handle lol. It's only because he knows I have to be up at seven for uni and he doesn't have to be up ... ever.... But it still gets on my nerves!! You'd have thought he'd stop telling me by now hehe. I snap quite a lot - I get angry really quickly, but I calm down equally quickly, so at least I'm never mad for more than half an hour (except once or twice for really major things). But it's just so easy to misunderstand when not in person! But as has been said already, there's different issues when it comes to being CD. Like bathrooms and kitchens lol.

[xsomanymilesx]

same here, so far away, i can never ever stay mad at him lol + hes always calm and stuff so its like, il just make myself look like a knob if i carry it on :P

[Caitlin2009]

lol no i cant stay mad at her for long either, normally its only for a few minutes and then its swept under the rug quickly unless its a big time fight which is rare for us.

[XAngie976X]

Around that time of the relationship it happens, it's happening to me sometimes and the separation just gets to people. My friend tells me it's from the stress and girls eventually start getting hostile from lack of love and affection. Every little thing that I don't like I either get mad or get really sad to the point of tears that I think he'll just get tired and hang up but to me it's just hard to get used to someone who actually sticks with you when you're at your worst. Every girl has that little moment, the SO needs to know that and embrace it and never let you at your absolute worse.

[Caitlin2009]

Around that time of the relationship it happens, it's happening to me sometimes and the separation just gets to people. My friend tells me it's from the stress and girls eventually start getting hostile from lack of love and affection. Every little thing that I don't like I either get mad or get really sad to the point of tears that I think he'll just get tired and hang up but to me it's just hard to get used to someone who actually sticks with you when you're at your worst. Every girl has that little moment, the SO needs to know that and embrace it and never let you at your absolute worse.

amen to that! whenever i was in these moods with my ex he would threaten to break up with me if i didnt get out the mood quick, but with her she lets me be like that for awhile and we talk it out until im feeling better. its good to have someone love you so much like that

[BJL_Sweetheart1109]

Aw it's ok. We all do it. Last time I did this (got angry at him no matter what he did/said) I told him I was entitled to it. The distance it not easy, it really sucks! I deal with it just fine day after day after day.....and after a while it just gets too be way overwhelming. But I cope with it very well majority of the time I think I'm entitled to flying off the handle now and then. I find I tend to react with anger when I get overly stressed with school and the distance......it's like I'm just tired of being so far away and I miss him so much it almost physically hurts and I want more than anything just to have one kiss one hug....my heart just can't take it, I don't know how to respond or cope with it and I end up getting angry with him for everything he does. [[i told him that too. I apologized for being so crazy and being angry with him all week, but I told him all that about coping with it just fine and he needs to just deal with me being crazy for a week every couple of months. lol]]

It has basically everything to do with the distance and being so far away (for me at least). When he's home we spend a lot of time together but we still do our own thing. I am more than ok with giving him guy time or hanging out with him and his friends. But no matter what, at the end of the day, he's still coming home giving me kisses, holding me in his arms, and sleeping next to me. But in our current situation I don't have anything.....not a kiss, not a hug, not even a slight brush of his arm against mine. All I have are our phone calls and webcam sessions. When those don't go how you want them to, or he's not so sensitive (making it suggestive instead of being sweet about it) well I'd get angry too.

He knows by now...if I'm getting angry at him for almost anything it's probably just me stressed out with other things and just not being capable of dealing with the distance as well. I've told him that when he's away too long and I miss him so much my heart gets heavy, it start to physically hurt to be so far away for so long.....and sometimes it's just easier to be mad at him than hurt like that. We also have about 11 months/1 week [my countdown ticker in my signatrure. ] until we are CDR.....and I'm beyond ready for it and it's so close, but still so far.

Idk. That's sort of how I feel and why I think I react the way I do sometimes. I've also told him all that. Explained to him why I some times act the way I do. I do it in an email bc I'm better at writing my feelings, I get too emotional when I talk about it. He doesn't usually write back, but it makes it easier for him when he understands why I'm doing what I do. He also usually kind of lets it "run it's course" and might try to text/call a little more. It helps him understand how to deal with me and react to me. Hope it helps..........

[Yei&Jon]

Around that time of the relationship it happens, it's happening to me sometimes and the separation just gets to people. My friend tells me it's from the stress and girls eventually start getting hostile from lack of love and affection. Every little thing that I don't like I either get mad or get really sad to the point of tears that I think he'll just get tired and hang up but to me it's just hard to get used to someone who actually sticks with you when you're at your worst. Every girl has that little moment, the SO needs to know that and embrace it and never let you at your absolute worse.

Amen! (As well xD) Jon is always surprising me when it comes to that. Like right now, I'm on the phone with him as it's like nothing happened. Laughing, joking... Sheesh, god bless him. <3

[XAngie976X]

It's hard to find a good guy that will stick around so he'll be there for you and knows what you're dealing with.

(btw I'm Puerto Rican too sorry I just had to point that out)