Feeling the distance in a different way?

[Yaaamiii]

So this thought crossed my mind today, its actually something I'm kinda afraid of. I'm kinda weird in the sense that I tend to feel the distance more-so when I've never seen where my SO lives. For example, during our freshman year of college, I never went to visit my SO at his school because I was still living at home and couldn't afford it regardless. I tended to feel the distance more because I had never been to where he lived..if that makes any sense. I felt like he was farther than 700 miles away, like he lived in this unknown place I had never been to or heard of. Now he's transferring schools, and after a year of being CD, I tend to be afraid of the same thing. Maybe I'll be able to visit him this time, maybe I won't. Either way, is it just me who is weird about this kind of thing?

[Dauntedpoet]

My SO moved twice in the last 3 years and it didn't 'bother' me per say, but now that I have been there I love being able to picture it all exactly.. him going up up the stairs turning to the left and going to bed.. or leaving his hand towel on the rack on the right after washing his hands.. the smallest stuff. On the reverse.. its always much harder being in a place alone after your SO has been there because you miss them so much more when they are gone.. looking for their stuff everywhere.

[GatoGirl]

Yaamii, that makes perfect sense what you say. You don't have any idea what things look like at his end of the world, so it's a big unknown. Unknowns are always unsettling. I think we make it even worse because we then tell ourselves that we 'shouldn't be anxious' when the fact is we are. Ask him to send you some photos of his living space, the school, etc.

[mickey's bird]

My SO feels the same way you do. The last time he was here was over a decade ago. At first I thought it was strange that he would ask me to take pictures of myself through the day and in various parts of my home. He explained that when he gets those pictures it's like he's getting to envision where I live and he feels a bit more apart of my everyday life.

[Yaaamiii]

Yes, unknowns are very unsettling. It's frustrating that they are though. And yah, I guess what it really comes down to is that knowing where he lives makes me feel like a bigger part of his everyday life...because then if he says something like "oh I'm walking down _______" I can say "oh, yah jaja." Instead all I can say is "ok... D:" cuz I don't know what he's talking about though I wish I did! Thanks guys

[rhiannae]

It's not completely going to help but how about asking your SO to take some photos from around the place? I completely felt the same and luckily was able to visit pretty early but photos would have been my next port of call