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what will I gonna do?...he asked for a break,,he ask for space :hurt:

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    what will I gonna do?...he asked for a break,,he ask for space :hurt:

    it's been 4 days ago as my SO,,told me this line "I need a break,please leave me alone for a while",..it hurts for me as I heard that line,.I'm speechless and tears started to fall in my eyes..I asked him whats going on,,I messaged him,,but he didnt reply..and as I message his best friend to please ask him coz I cant understand why?,,as his best friend told me,.my SO said that the reason why he ask for space is because he is been exhausted the way I treated him,.he gets annoyed everytime I'm trying to message him,call him in skype,,to ask him how is he?,,coz i'm just missing him,..I usually did that even before..to call him,..but now he gets annoyed...I don't know now what will I gonna do?...

    guys please give me some advice,.I feel so down now and helpless...
    missing him so much...
    dianelovesjeremy

    #2
    It sounds like he just feels a bit smothered. I would give him the space that he's asking for and then, when he contacts you try to talk things out.

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      #3
      I'm sorry to hear that love...but yes as Mara said, give him the space like he told you to. I know it's not easy and you're having this uneasy feeling, wondering what's going on, but try to be patient and perhaps wait until he contacts you first. Then hopefully you guys can start talking about what's actually happening.

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        #4
        I think you need to STOP messaging him for a while. In your previous posts it does sound like to smother him a bit and its getting to him. He needs space, especially now. He's fed up and if you don't give him space he will leave for good. Do what he's asked and hopefully he can clear his head and you two can talk it through. Until he comes to you, do not message his friends, or him...you need to be strong and wait.

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          #5
          Originally posted by Mara View Post
          It sounds like he just feels a bit smothered. I would give him the space that he's asking for and then, when he contacts you try to talk things out.
          until when?...it his birthday tomorrow..can i just greet him?...
          dianelovesjeremy

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            #6
            Originally posted by Mara View Post
            It sounds like he just feels a bit smothered. I would give him the space that he's asking for and then, when he contacts you try to talk things out.
            until when?...it his birthday tomorrow..can i just greet him?...
            dianelovesjeremy

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              #7
              Like everyone else here said, if he says he needs space then you should give him some.
              I have been in the same situation, altough my SO wanted space because her personal life was a mess and she just couldn't handle everything at the same time. So we went on a break for a whole month and for the first week it was really difficult for me because I was constantly worried of her, wondering what's going on, wondering if it's because of me even though she told me it's not about me. After that month we bonded even more and we're doing great!

              Just try to keep yourself occupied. Hang out with friends, watch movies, read some good books, do things you have wanted to do but haven't found the time for. This could be a good chance for you to breathe a little bit too, don't you think? Have some time for yourself only. I also think it would have been fair from your boyfriend to tell you how long of a break does he want, but perhaps you shouldn't ask now when he's not even answering you. Just give him time and let him contact you. And about the birthday, I don't know... I know I would probably just send my SO one text and wish her a happy birthday if I was in your situation, but I don't know what would be the right thing to do.
              "Everyone smiles in the same language."

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                #8
                Until he contacts you first. For tomorrow, I think a short message saying "Happy Birthday" is ok. But that's it and don't expect for any reply.

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                  #9
                  I agree with bluishskin, do not contact him until he contacts you. About his birthday, did you send him a present or a card or anything? If you did, then I'm not sure if I'd even contact him to say happy birthday. If you didn't, I'd send him a short message saying Happy Birthday I hope it's a good one and leave it at that. He's asked for space and I know it's really hard, but you have to respect that. Who knows, it's already been four days, he might contact you on his own soon. Just give him some breathing space, it'll be okay.

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                    #10
                    Do not contact him at all, wait for him to call you. It sounds like you already have been trying to contact him since he told you he needed space, I probably would tell you to stop for now. Wait until he contacts you. From your old posts it sounds like he felt you were smothering him. It doesn't work that way with most guys, they don't need or want as much attention as girls want. As for the birthday thing, just send him one text or email only saying happy birthday and that you love him, but I wouldn't tell him much else.

                    And by the way, once he finally does contact you, I would ask him if he's feeling better and if its ok to start trying to contact him again. Just to play it safe

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                      #11
                      From your previous post in here i could say you're very clingy to your SO. I think i read your post about crying too... if i am not mistaken. Its just too much for a guy to take!

                      Its nothing wrong with that, but give him some space! i am not being negative here just observing your previous post thats all... maybe LDR not for you because you sound like can not take the distance between both of you just like he did it--sorry if this is sound mean... but you could toughen up a little bit for him like previous post advise from many people here.

                      For his bday just say happy bday and thats all. Let him contact you first after that. Give him some space to think about everything. Better do this rather than loose him for good.

                      Hope everything is ok for you

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                        #12
                        Hello!
                        I have to say that I am agree with all people here who told you to STOP contact him and give your SO a space!!
                        As long as I know, a guy doesn't like it when his lover act like a "possessive" lover. Please note that here I use "possessive" word because you sounds like that in terms of contacting him very often by phone, sms, skype and all.
                        A guy is also human that needs time or space for himself. That is why I think it is normal for him to ask you to give him a break.

                        We are all suffering from a long distance relationship and I also know that you need him, but doesn't mean that you have to do it way too often in contacting him. He may feel tired and even scare or worst, run away instead of loving you and care for you more.

                        As bad as it sounds, but it's true.
                        As for his birthday, if you haven't sent him any birthday card or gift then you can send him a short text saying "Happy Birthday". But then just that.
                        Hope the best for you and good luck!

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                          #13
                          Maybe you should just send a quick "Happy Birthday" email. I wouldn't recommend text because you would probably keep checking your phone to see if he replied. Once a person ask for their space, please do not contact them nor their friends (that's the quickest way to annoy them and drive them away). By contacting him after he requested that you not do it, it shows that you can't/don't respect his wishes.
                          sigpic

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                            #14
                            Originally posted by mickey's bird View Post
                            Once a person ask for their space, please do not contact them nor their friends (that's the quickest way to annoy them and drive them away). By contacting him after he requested that you not do it, it shows that you can't/don't respect his wishes.
                            True!!

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                              #15
                              Honestly it was going to happen sooner or later, like everyone else said from your previous posts you were really smothering and clingy to your SO. In a previous post you even said you two were engaged so if that's the case to be honest why are you being so clingy, he's with you because he wants to, there is no need to smother him.

                              for his birthday send him a really short email that says "Happy Birthday, I hope you have a wonderful day today" and end it with that do not try to add things like i miss you and i'm sorry in there it will just push him away even more, after the birthday email wait for him to contact you again.

                              While you may miss him go out and do your own thing, do not sit at home waiting for him, hoping he'll contact you go out work, hang out with friends ect something to keep your mind off of not talking to him.




                              Treasuretrooper <-- how I helped pay for some of my LDR expenses when I was in one.

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