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    Which one is worst?

    Actually, that should probably be which one is the hardest?

    1. Being CD and then going LD?
    or
    2. Starting off LD online?

    Is there really a way of being LD that's harder?

    Love you forever and forever
    Love you with all my heart
    Love you whenever we're together
    Love you when we're apart.

    #2
    I would say the first one. Because although mine started off online. After meeting and being together in person and now he's gone. Its so much harder missing him then before. I now know specific things to miss, rather then just missing him come online. Which i still do lol. But i have hope and faith that he loves me and will come see me again soon. I hope we can end this distance....
    I love you Nathan <3
    sigpic
    5/25/09 <3

    Comment


      #3
      If you're CD then forced to go LD, I would say it depends entirely on the circumstances and reasons why you're having to go LD. For me, I would say starting off LD online would be the hardest, simply because if you start off CD, at least you know what your SO is like to be around in person, what it's like to hold and cuddle them, hug them, talk to them face to face, etc. When you start off LD online, you've never had the luxury of being able to be with your SO, or talk to them face to face in person, only via webcam, and it's not the same as being able to interact with someone whilst they're there with you. You can't touch them, you can only imagine, and for me, the lack of physical contact is so torturous it's unbelievable.

      But then again...it must be extremely hard to have to see a CDR become an LDR...I can't begin to imagine how painful that would be.

      Comment


        #4
        I don't think one is harder than the other.
        Being LD is hard no matter what. end of story. In my mind, at least.
        I will agree after meeting my boy in person, the missing is different. I know what I'm missing. Being LD before we met in person was hard to. I had all the "I wonders" I wonder if his hair is as soft as it looks, I wonder if his eyes are as green as they look on camera, I wonder if they'll be fireworks the first time we kiss, etc. And there would be nights I'd cry because we were so far away and I wanted to know his touch.
        It's hard, either way. And I don't really believe one way's harder.

        First Met Online: October 2010
        First Confessed Feelings: December 21, 2011
        Became a "Couple": January 7, 2012
        First Meeting: March 9-14, 2012
        Second Meeting: July 16-31, 2012
        Closed the Distance: May 30, 2013
        Engaged!: June 1, 2013
        Picking out wedding dates now!

        Comment


          #5
          I guess unless I'd done both, it'd be hard to say lol. But I did the first, and it ripped me to shreds!! It's such a horrible feeling, going from seeing the person you love almost every day, to once every 3-4 months. I honestly don't know if I could do it again. Plus, we always had crazy chemistry in person, and having to learn to adjust to only talking online, and often going quite awhile without hearing his voice... it's awful.


          Love will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free

          Met: Cork, Ireland - December 31, 2009 • Started Dating: Cork, Ireland - May 22, 2010 • Became LD: July 15, 2010 • My Move From Canada to UK: October 26, 2011
          Closed the distance June 18, 2012!

          Comment


            #6
            Well, I've never had an LD that started off online, so I really have nothing to compare it to. My SO and I started off CD, and only switched to being LD when I had to return to my home country to work. I had to adjust from seeing him everyday (he lived literally right down the street from me), spending a good portion of my time with him & his family, sharing my day to day activities w/him...to barely any contact at all. The adjustment period was extremely difficult. I do feel one bonus to starting off an LD online is that you have the internet (Skype, Google Talk, Chat, etc) to aid you in your communication. Since the relationship is built online, internet communication becomes very strong. That alone is a huge advantage as my biggest challenge in my relationship now is that my SO has no internet access. Communication is very infrequent and I have to say at times, I feel quite envious reading about other relationships on here that have more frequent communication (esp. international relationships) aided a great part by the internet. I think LD's that started as CD's have to take more time to figure out the best way to communicate; there may be more bumps along the way as the adjustment to the LD is made.

            Comment


              #7
              I started of CD with my SO. He had to move because his dad was being an ass.
              I think its harder being CD and going LD because I was around him a lot and now I'm pretty much by myself 90% of the time.
              " There is always hope.
              "

              Comment


                #8
                I say the first because thats how mw and my so were. We lived 8 miles away saw each other everyday and then he got a job for gas company and i havent seen him for bout 2 months and its sooo hard.
                Finally happy and at peace with her man Timmy

                Comment


                  #9
                  Since me and my SO have always been LD, i can only imagine that being CD first and it turning into LD can be the hardest. Whenever your LD from the beginning its all you know.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    When you go from CD to LD you at least had a certain amount of time with your SO. When you start LD you always wonder how it would be like to be with that person, how it would feel like to kiss them. You didn't experience anything at all with them. I think both are hard though.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by NaNi View Post
                      When you go from CD to LD you at least had a certain amount of time with your SO. When you start LD you always wonder how it would be like to be with that person, how it would feel like to kiss them. You didn't experience anything at all with them. I think both are hard though.
                      I think it gets harder knowing what it's like to be with your SO...to kiss them, hold them, smell them...everything. It becomes very real and those moments are what you refer back to when the distance really hurts.
                      I have seen from threads on the forum that the dynamic within LDRs that began online change once the first meeting happens. It seems to go from "will I like them as much in person?" to "yes, I definitely liked them as much in person and now I can't wait to see them again". I think "knowing what you're missing" as opposed to "imagining what your missing" could definitely be perceived as more difficult. Maybe members whose LDRs began online can offer feedback on how things changed after the first meeting (ie. if it got easier or harder).

                      Comment


                        #12
                        I'd have to say they're about equal. Yes when you start off CD you know what you miss when you finally go LD but when you start out LD you don't have any memories or experiences to recall when you're feeling lonely, you don't know what it's like to BE with your SO you just have to imagine how they would comfort you.

                        Notes:
                        Met: 8.17.09
                        Started Dating: 8.20.09
                        First Met: 10.2.10
                        Closed the Distance: 8.9.14

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by books View Post
                          I think it gets harder knowing what it's like to be with your SO...to kiss them, hold them, smell them...everything. It becomes very real and those moments are what you refer back to when the distance really hurts.
                          I have seen from threads on the forum that the dynamic within LDRs that began online change once the first meeting happens. It seems to go from "will I like them as much in person?" to "yes, I definitely liked them as much in person and now I can't wait to see them again". I think "knowing what you're missing" as opposed to "imagining what your missing" could definitely be perceived as more difficult. Maybe members whose LDRs began online can offer feedback on how things changed after the first meeting (ie. if it got easier or harder).
                          That's what I kinda meant. Relationships that began CD have all that. The people involved can think back on wonderful memories together, but couples that started out LD don't have any of that. When the distance really gets too much for them they can't think back on any memory. I guess it just really depends on the person. My relationship started LD (online) and it was definitely harder after the first visit.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            I'm about to do the first one. I don't think any one is "worse" they're too different. One is getting to actually see the person day in and day out--easy. The other is waiting for them to come online; waiting to actually meet them, etc. I think they're both equally hard depending on the people involved. They also might be drastically different. All depends on the couple and the relationship.

                            I think my boyfriend and I are doing pretty well getting ourselves prepared to go LD; but it's a different thing entirely to actually do it, even if it is exactly what you know you have to and WANT to do.
                            ". . . We obviously have to come to accept it, but that doesn't stop it from gnawing at us day by day.
                            The best we can do is enjoy our time together, anticipate our reunions, and remain passionate and loyal through distance." ~Mike <3



                            ~*~11.21.2010~*~

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Well I'll have to pick the first one considering thats the situation that I'm in. It really sucks knowing what your missing when you're forced to go LD for quite some time.
                              My favorite text message conversation:

                              Tobby:love ko! what are you doing?
                              Nika:learning how to cook love ko.
                              Tobby:cooking? please put some in a plastic bag and send some to me so i can taste it! <3
                              Nika: weh? your silly! I'm learning how to cook so when we get married, I'll be cooking all your meals love ko. <3
                              Tobby:your so sweet.<3 marry me now? hahaha
                              Nika: We're still kids love ko, lets wait until we're more mature, but you know my answer will be yes, whenever you ask!
                              Tobby:I love you so much! You're the one for me, I'll wait as long as i need to love ko. love you!
                              Nika:I love you too! call me Nika Sy now.. hehe
                              Tobby: Addict!
                              Nika: Addicted! <3

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