I Let Another Weekend Slip Away Without Saying I Love You

[Sierra]

I promised myself that this weekend was the weekend I would tell my boyfriend how much I love him for the first time. I was so anxious about it I was able to convince myself not to every time. Not telling him is making me insane, I want him to know how I really feel about him but I'm afraid saying I love you will put too much pressure on him.

I wish I were less of a goober. Now he's gone and I have to wait five weeks for the chance to tell him again.

[snow_girl]

I waited 5 months for him to tell me. Every night before bed, I would want to say it but based on what had happened when I asked if we were in a relationship at the beginning I didn't want to be the first one to say it. Finally after a year of being together it was one of our last days together before he went back home and I told myself I had to do it. It still took me ages but I finally said it cause I didn't think he ever would and as soon as I said it without even thinking he said it back. Then had the nerve to tell me he was going to do it that night as well!!

Anyway don't be nervous, he's probably even more scared to do it then you are.

[Sierra]

I wish he would tell me, and it's sad to me that I freeze up like I do. I know he loves me, I'm sure of it, it's just ... articulating the words scares me more than I thought it would, especially given my age, but I've been through so many bad relationships, I'm so scared to get hurt again and invest my heart, and even though I'm already so emotionally invested, I guess to me saying those words really makes it concrete. Every day we had together this past weekend I kept telling myself I was going to do it, and then backing down. I feel like a coward.

I know he's scared too, he said something about us loving one another and then caught himself and got this look on his face and I just wanted to tell him, baby I do love you ... but when I tried to spit out the words ... couldn't do it.

We do have some issues in our relationship regarding me not going to be able to go out to visit him until he changes his living situation and I made it clear that I can't fully trust him until I do go see him where he lives and he said he understands. When I dropped him off at the airport he told me that the next time we saw each other he'd have good news about him moving and all that, and as soon as that's sorted out maybe I'll be less afraid.

It's just that I feel that not telling him how I feel hurts me, and I'm sure it hurts him too.

[snow_girl]

I had all that fear built up too before I said anything. I made it out to be a way bigger deal then it was. I was actually a little disappointed that it was just so blase compared to what I was expecting. You can still love him and he can love you even if there are issues. I caught my SO a couple times drop the L word in conversation before we said it and then act like nothing happened. I think it was him testing the water. Still I think you should say it, what is the worst that could happen?

[Sierra]

I know how right you are, and for me, I just want to get it off my chest so he knows in no uncertain terms how I feel about him.

I will do my best to say it next time we see each other, it's not too far away. But I have to admit, it's hard to get off the phone with him and not say I love you, I catch myself always biting my tongue. I wish I could just say it and get it over with.

[snow_girl]

But I have to admit, it's hard to get off the phone with him and not say I love you, I catch myself always biting my tongue..

Yep I know that one all too well. He came to Canada for 5 months and it ate me inside. My family say it all the time so I would catch myself about to say it to him just out of habit from saying it to my parents, there was def a few awkward moments.

[kteire]

Yep I know that one all too well. He came to Canada for 5 months and it ate me inside. My family say it all the time so I would catch myself about to say it to him just out of habit from saying it to my parents, there was def a few awkward moments.

Same here!! I always tell people when I love them, my family says it every time we hang up the phone, say goodbye, cook each other dinner, etc. Holding it in for the while that I did was not fun haha.

But MAN is it scary to say it for the first time!! I knew that he loved me too, but it took me loads of attempts to actually say it. Although, apparently he spent a solid month panicking about what he'd say when I said it, because he knew I loved him, and it didn't occur to him that he loved me too haha. And so when I did say it, he said something like "Ohhh, of course I do!"

[Kristin91]

For me, I was really nervous to tell my SO that I loved him the first time. Then once I realized I wanted to tell him I had to stop myself from saying it because I wanted to tell him in person. But when I finally got the chance to tell him it was amazing! It just seemed perfect!