On and Off

[LoveMe515]

i have a LDR i live in new york he lives in tennessee .me and my boyfriend saw each other for the first time on July 30th 2011 we had so much fun we saw each other at the south street seaport in new york it was perfect and after that day i was so happy for a whole week nothing could bring me down but after a week i started to get so sad and depressed i cried myself to sleep i missed him so much and so i told him what i was feeling and we decided to take a break so we can be friends and i get better but then i really got over him like i fell out of love with him at that point it was basically over but we talk and we still best friends like we talk like best friends all day long but im sad because i ruined everything i really loved him and my stupid feelings got me out of love i really loved him I usee to love him i could see my future with him now i messed thingss up i want him back i wanna fall back into love but i alreadyy putt him thruu to muchh BS sadd part is he lovess me soo much and i broke his heart for the 3 times he is a really nicee guyy too we talked today and he was telling me how even though we arent together but he misses me how he sees other couples together and he got sad and he wants me and how he wants to hold me in his arms i wanna tell him i want him back but i want him happy i dont wanna break his heart again because i love him please help me

[iamangel]

First, Take a deep breath and relax.
If you still love each other then what's the problem? Coz you're afraid that you can hurt him again? If that so, before get him back ,give him an assurance that you will never hurt him again and this time you will be sure on your feelings, be sure that you will never regret your decision and be responsible on what decisions you will make...
Good luck

[kteire]

I'm a bit confused, because you said both that you love him and don't love him anymore... If you really did love him and have fallen out of love with him, it's not fair to him to take him back just to spare his feelings. It will hurt him very much, but you have to be honest about your feelings, and it would hurt both of you more if you tried to keep going, and never did fall back in love with him, and have to break up then instead. You should only get back together with him if you do still love him. I'd recommend taking a bit of space from each other for a little while so you can figure out what you feel, and if you do really miss him and love him, go for it.

[pytsip]

It sounds like you're a bit confused about your own feelings. I will say this, there's two paths that can be taken when in a long distance relationship, the first is the concept of "Distance makes the heart grow fonder" meaning, that the more you're away from someone, the more you realize how much you love them and how much you want to be with them. The second concept is "Out of sight, out of mind" which means that the more you're away from someone, the less important they become to you. we all have people who fit into each path, and sometimes those people are the people who we thought we loved very much. Unfortunately, sometimes the people we think we love very much end up falling into the "out of sight, out of mind" path, and what happens is that if you break up, or if you're far away from each other, you start to loose your feelings for that person. It doesn't necessarily mean that you don't love the person, and it doesn't mean that you're incapable of re-loving that person. But you need to figure out how you actually feel about your SO now because it's not fair to him to keep dragging him along. If you love him and you want to be with him, then get back together with him and go down the distance makes the heart grow fonder path and embrace it. Surprisingly, ldr's are some of the best relationships to be in, because every time you see that person agin, it's like you're seeing them for the first time. It's always the honeymoon stage!

But, if you realize that you just can't handle the distance and that you're already started down the other path, then it's not fair to drag him along with you, you need to let him go because that's what's best for both of you.