How do you cope with your SO's problems?

[Ninjamonkeys]

The last couple of weeks has been not so great in the life of my SO. I've tried to cheer her up, even succeeded on occasion but I can't do anything about the cause of the problems or even the symptoms. If I was there then we could hug or something to make things better but I can't be, I'm over 3000 miles away. I keep reminding her that I'm going to be visiting soon, in about 2 months, and that I'll be there for 6 weeks and we'll have an epic time. I'm writing this after a weekend of sporadic sleep, due to trying to keep my SO happy, so if i sound like an idiot, it's that!

Is there anything else anyone else does to try and help their SO and cope with not being able to help them out with their problems?

[HollzHeartsChris]

I know how you feel. My SO has been having a horrendous time lately and I've been doing all I can to keep him strong. It's hard being 5100 miles away from him, but the best thing you can do for your SO is be there for her as much as you possibly can and comfort her. It's what I've had to do. Discuss what's bothering you both, talk about it. One thing my SO and I've been doing through all our hardships is escaping into a virtual world and playing some games. It's fun to just forget what's bothering you both, and the distraction sounds to me like something you both could use. Even if you're both not much of a gamer, you could always just try some of the simple games that msn has to offer for example. There's also some games that Michelle and Frank have listed on their list of 99 things to do that you both could try out Just keep her spirits up as much as you can, it's all you can do until you close the distance.

[Zephii]

Listen to them. Even if they are teling you the exact same thing for the hundreth time. Don't lose your patience, just listen. Knowing someone cares sometimes is enough.

[bluishskin]

Oh gee that sounds kinda similar with me and my SO. :P
First off, I'm a moody person (according to a fingerprint analysis my brother conducts I use 90% feeling and 10% logic...can you imagine that?) and sometimes I get upset about things that maybe I shouldn't be upset about, but that happens and sometimes I just can't help it. What my SO does is similar to you; he tells me that we will see each other again soon and/or he just listens to whatever I need to say. If what I'm upset about relates to our relationship, then we share ideas and thoughts. If not, sometimes there isn't much he can do other than listening to me and trying to make me calm. It takes time for me to deal with whatever I'm dealing with, and I admire his patience. He's also good at consoling me and making me laugh.
I pretty much do the same thing when he's having problems. In LDR we often wish we could do a lot more to help our SOs, but sometimes there isn't much to do either. Communication, listening to each other and being patient are the keys.

[Minerva]

Everyone in an LDR goes through this. I find this perhaps the toughest aspect of being long distance.

You can only be there. Listen to her. Send her little surprise messages through out the day. Tell her you love her. Give her space if she needs it. And try to be strong even if you feel helpless. I know when I'm down, I get strength from my bf, and I hope he does from me as well when he's down.

Finally, take care of yourself. Please try to sleep and try (though I know it's hard) not to stress about what you can't do, and instead focus on what you can. You can't hug her from across the ocean, but you can support her, and that will help.

Take care.

[Piglet-]

First off, appreciate the fact that she seeking you for asylum. She could be sulking in complete isolation but chooses to come to you. She trusts you.
Continue your support Mr.NinjaMonkey, you are obviously doing a good job. (:
She knows you are there to comfort her in her time of need and will realize this more so when her issues are straightened out.
It is obvious to us and to her that you love and care for her.

[Ninjamonkeys]

Thanks for the swift replies guys and girls. We often play games on OMGPOP, listed on the 99 things to do, along with a couple of other games. I'll keep that in mind to do with the distracting. She does tell me that just talking to me helps, even though it doesn't appear so from my point of view and I have been trying to go out of my way to talk to her, like this weekend.

Thanks guys, you've made me feel better just because you've confirmed things that i kinda doubted.

You Rock!

[Piglet-]

Haha, good luck with your relationship Mr.NinjaMonkey.

p.s.
I find your Theodore 'Chewbacca' Roosevelt avatar quite charming. ^^

[Ninjamonkeys]

Haha, good luck with your relationship Mr.NinjaMonkey.

p.s.
I find your Theodore 'Chewbacca' Roosevelt avatar quite charming. ^^

Why thank you, amusement is the sole aim of that avatar!

[Rugger]

Send her snail mail! It always makes me feel a little bit happier when I get a letter

[pytsip]

At the risk of being redundant, I'm going to go with what a lot of other people have already said and say just listen to her.

[Piglet-]

At the risk of being redundant, I'm going to go with what a lot of other people have already said and say just listen to her.

[Jezah]

As the SO in question, I say....just listen and do exactly as you have been doing.

You help so much love, and I feel awful that I even need to drag you into this. However, you wanting to help badly enough to seek advice made me . Its hard, but we made it through more than 3 months and we only have 2 to go...when I am not depressed, and feeling happy like right now, I can see that. Sometimes my tears cloud my vision and its hard to see, but one thing that is always crystal clear is how much you love me and I love you.