Friends issues

[SeaLover]

Since my ex and I broke up, she has went about continuing to be friends with a couple of my close friends. I was just wondering if anyone else has had this happen to them. I think it's making it harder on me to move on because she's indirectly still in my life, But I don't want to cut any ties with my friends. Any advice on the subject would be greatly appreciated.

[snow_girl]

Not a whole lot you can do. When you introduce friends to a SO they inadvertently become her friends as well if you are together long enough or hang out in a group often. So just because you have broken up doesn't mean she has to break up with the friends as well. Generally those friendships aren't long lasting once the relationship ends but talk to your friends about it and just let them know if they are hanging out with you, you'd rather her not be there.

[Rugger]

I had this happen to me. I dated a guy who was abusive and even after we broke up, my "best" friends were still friends with him. I would not hang out with them if he was there, I would have no contact with him whatsoever.

Just tell your friends that if she is around, you won't be. You are uncomfortable around her and they should respect that. They can still hang out with her, just not at the same time you are.

[lucybelle]

I had this happen where my friend/roommate became friends with my ex after we broke up. One time I came home to my apartment and he was there with his new girlfriend. Oh shit was I pissed. I just went to my friend and told her that I was super uncomfortable with him being in the apartment. I told her she can be friends, whatever I can't tell her what to do, but I don't ever want to see him or hear about him. Eventually she understood, and I never had to see him again.

[SeaLover]

I guess you're right. Besides telling them that I'm not comfortable around her, I'll just have to grin and bear it.