In Need of A Little Support...

[jlb14]

My SO went back to college this week and has been partying every night since he got there. While this isn't the problem because I fully trust him I'm having a hard time with it. I graduated in May so he went back and I stayed home. It is really hard feeling left out of the loop. When I was in school I would go out with him all the time and it was always so much fun. Now he goes out and he doesn't talk to me. It almost feels like he has forgotten about me (which I know isn't true at all but it is the feeling I have) which when I'm stuck at home is hard to take.

I feel like if he would talk to me when he went out or say things like "Oh if you were here it would be better." or "This party sucks without you." The comments would help me to know he does feel the distance. Granted I would never tell him because I am a believer that you shouldn't tell someone to say something...they should want to say it if they mean it.

I'm not trying to sound like a whiny angsty teenager but it is a hard adjustment. I don't mind him going out and I would never EVER consider asking him to stop. It is almost like the hard adjustment is him going out without me. (And it doesn't help I can't really go out at home because I have an adult life now complete with a job.)

I couldn't visit him this weekend because he has a volleyball tournament all day tomorrow. But of course that means Saturday night and tonight he will get to go out with our mutual friends. I did find myself plans for the weekend but it's hard when I just want to be with my SO and don't know the next time I'll see him.

If you have been through it advice is nice but otherwise just having someone listen helps. Thanks everyone.

[kiara_silver]

I've felt this, before my SO would go out and one point there was a incident when he was out dancing or whatever, and so for awhile when he went out i would feel a bit mhmm uneasy? I would wonder if im in his thoughts, is he having fun with others and im last on his mind? Butnow we been together in person and i think it strengthened our bond.. And when he goes out he comes back and tells me it was depressing or he wishes i were there. Granted its nice to know, and after reading what you wrote i appreciate it even more that he does, but at the same time i want him to be happy and have fun. I dont want him to be depressed not enjoying himself because of our LDR. I know its hard to not be apart of social events. The distance sucks, but i think its good if your SO goes out and does his thing every now and then, keeps you happy when your busy and not focused on the missing so much. With a LDR i kind of feel like you have 2 lives, the life you share with your SO and then your own seperate life aart. Idk if that makes sense, I just think in a LDR you still have to go out and do your own thing and enjoy it. That being said I get where your coming from completly, My choice like many others would be with our SO's all the time. But just focus on his happiness and you go out and do your own thing too, thats my advice